Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — Сосед инопланетян организует у себя в подвале мужскую комнату. Корво и Терри решают, что им нужна такая же комната, которая, однако, не приносит им радости. Корво начинает понимать, что всё дело в женщине. У соседа есть недовольная жена, от которой тот и прячется в подвале. Корво создаёт недовольную женщину-робота на основе жён из телесериалов. Ему нравится, что этот женоробот осуждает и унижает его, а Терри наоборот находит в роботе мать. Через некоторое время программа робота сбивается, и он начинает убивать мужчин. Репликанты в это время изучают в школе феминизм. Девочкам нужно написать доклад о том, как они боролись с патриархатом. Джесси раздражена излишней толерантностью современного общества, из-за которой она не может найти ни одного женоненавистника.

Предыдущая серия S01 E05 Лавовый реактор

Следующая серия S01 E07 Терри и Корво украли медведя

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я

The P.A.T.R.I.C.I.A. Device

Сезон: 01Серия: 06

Описание

Сосед инопланетян организует у себя в подвале мужскую комнату. Корво и Терри решают, что им нужна такая же комната, которая, однако, не приносит им радости. Корво начинает понимать, что всё дело в женщине. У соседа есть недовольная жена, от которой тот и прячется в подвале. Корво создаёт недовольную женщину-робота на основе жён из телесериалов. Ему нравится, что этот женоробот осуждает и унижает его, а Терри наоборот находит в роботе мать. Через некоторое время программа робота сбивается, и он начинает убивать мужчин. Репликанты в это время изучают в школе феминизм. Девочкам нужно написать доклад о том, как они боролись с патриархатом. Джесси раздражена излишней толерантностью современного общества, из-за которой она не может найти ни одного женоненавистника.

Субтитры

00:00:04,504 --> 00:00:06,339 ♪ dramatic music playing ♪
00:00:06,423 --> 00:00:07,257 [both grunting]
00:00:07,382 --> 00:00:09,884 -[tires screeching] -[horns honking]
00:00:09,968 --> 00:00:12,387 ♪
00:00:14,931 --> 00:00:16,141 [bell dinging]
00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:20,311 [squawk]
00:00:27,318 --> 00:00:28,820 [heavy breathing]
00:00:28,903 --> 00:00:31,281 Oh, my god, oh, my god, oh, my god, we don't have noses!
00:00:31,364 --> 00:00:32,782 [all gasp]
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:35,285 KORVO: <i>Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia</i>
00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:36,953 <i>until the asteroid hit.</i>
00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:40,540 <i>One hundred adults and their replicants were issued a pupa</i>
00:00:40,623 --> 00:00:42,417 <i>and escaped into, uh, the space,</i>
00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:45,462 <i>searching for new homes on uninhabited worlds.</i>
00:00:45,545 --> 00:00:48,256 <i>We crashed on Earth, stranding us on an already overpopulated planet.</i>
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:50,175 <i>That's right, I've been talking this whole time.</i>
00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:52,135 <i>I'm the one holding the pupa. My name's Korvo.</i>
00:00:52,218 --> 00:00:54,512 <i>This is, this is my show. I just dropped the pupa. Do you see me?</i>
00:00:54,596 --> 00:00:55,722 <i>[stammers] This is ridiculous.</i>
00:00:55,805 --> 00:00:57,849 <i>I hate Earth. It's a horrible home.</i>
00:00:57,932 --> 00:01:00,477 <i>People are stupid. Why did they make so many languages?</i>
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:02,604 <i>Why didn't they just get together and figure out one language</i>
00:01:02,687 --> 00:01:04,981 <i>so when I go to a Mexican restaurant I can just order "cheese tube"</i>
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,775 <i>and not have someone roll their eyes at me.</i>
00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:08,610 ♪ dramatic music playing ♪
00:01:08,693 --> 00:01:11,321 ♪
00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:16,659 [birds cawing]
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:18,703 There's Kevin. Ooh, he's got somethin' cool.
00:01:18,828 --> 00:01:20,872 Oh, I want it. Oh, I want whatever Kevin has.
00:01:20,955 --> 00:01:23,875 What is that? It looks amazing. Come on, come on.
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:27,003 [grunts] Oh, man, I didn't realize they would be as teavy as they are tig.
00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:29,881 Oh, Korvo, Terry who looks like a Gary.
00:01:29,964 --> 00:01:31,299 - I wish. - Can we help you
00:01:31,382 --> 00:01:32,967 with your "tig old bitties" sign?
00:01:33,051 --> 00:01:34,552 What is that? A Catholic thing?
00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,596 [laughs] No.
00:01:36,679 --> 00:01:41,392 Tig old bitties. You get it? Think about it. Tig. Old. Bitties.
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:43,061 - Oh, yeah. - I-I definitely understand.
00:01:43,144 --> 00:01:44,687 It's announcing that the bitties are aged.
00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:47,482 - Oh, my favorite bitties are tig. - It's a joke sign for my man cave.
00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:50,068 Ooh, what's a "manc ave"?
00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:53,863 Well, here it is. This is where I can go and just get away from it all.
00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:56,282 A place I can express my most private self.
00:01:56,407 --> 00:01:58,201 Check out the Boondock Saints pinball machine.
00:01:58,284 --> 00:02:00,411 - Ooh. - And the classic bass.
00:02:00,537 --> 00:02:02,580 <i>♪ Put me in the lake ♪</i>
00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:05,834 What? He's talking to me? This fish is full of surprises.
00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:08,419 Ooh, posted rules. Number one, the man is always right.
00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:11,047 Number two, sports are life. These are all new to me.
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,007 I don't want to be in violation of any rules.
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:16,219 Here's the best part. Are you ready for me to blow your mind?
00:02:16,302 --> 00:02:17,470 -[gasps] - Oh, my God.
00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:19,556 God damn it, this-
00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:20,932 - Oh, oh, my. - Ooh.
00:02:21,015 --> 00:02:23,017 - There it is. - Kevin, are you coming up--
00:02:23,101 --> 00:02:26,688 oh, god, did you actually spend $3,000 on that misogynistic sign?
00:02:26,771 --> 00:02:28,148 - What is wrong with you? - Babe, what I do
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:30,316 with my Christmas bonus is my Christmas business.
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:31,234 [sighs]
00:02:31,359 --> 00:02:32,777 Korvo, let's just be real here.
00:02:32,861 --> 00:02:34,946 Please, please, please, please can we have a man cave?
00:02:35,029 --> 00:02:36,406 - Yes. - What, oh, really?
00:02:36,489 --> 00:02:38,658 Oh, man, you should have held out. I was gonna offer to suck your--
00:02:38,741 --> 00:02:41,202 Kevin is so confident and happy. He must get so much work done.
00:02:41,286 --> 00:02:44,914 Imagine how great our lives would be if we could be this confident.
00:02:45,039 --> 00:02:46,541 Did you notice that the football is actually a keg--
00:02:46,624 --> 00:02:47,876 Shut up, Kevin, we're imagining.
00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:53,006 From Coretta Scott King to Jill Soloway, these are just a few notable feminists
00:02:53,089 --> 00:02:55,133 who improved the lives of women everywhere.
00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:57,427 Ladies, this semester, your final grade
00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:59,679 depends on proof that you fought the patriarchy.
00:02:59,762 --> 00:03:03,308 I want a full report on a glass ceiling you tried to shatter by next Friday.
00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:04,726 What does that even mean?
00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:06,728 Uh, Miss Perez, what, what do the boys have to do?
00:03:06,811 --> 00:03:09,480 I don't care, the boys can just draw a picture of a lightsaber or something.
00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:11,649 You might as well learn now that life is just easier for you.
00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:12,567 [bell ringing]
00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:14,194 Don't forget to rate and tip me on the Teach app.
00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:17,071 Guys, guys, come on. I need it for my asthma medicine.
00:03:17,155 --> 00:03:18,448 I live near the quarry.
00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:21,618 Man, what am I gonna do? When I chose to be a girl,
00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:24,329 I thought it meant I'd get the better McDonald's toys.
00:03:24,412 --> 00:03:25,997 Now I have to topple something?
00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:28,124 I told you not to pick female. Remember?
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:30,877 I tried to explain that to you the minute I chose to be a man
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:32,212 and became better at explaining things.
00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:36,341 I just need to find a glass ceiling and shatter the crap out of it.
00:03:36,424 --> 00:03:40,386 Otherwise, Jill Soloway made I Love Dick for nothing.
00:03:40,470 --> 00:03:42,222 Ooh, you wanna help? We could topple it together.
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:44,474 Yeah, I'm gonna pass. I'm just gonna hang back
00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,059 and do a regular alien thing today.
00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:48,228 Come on, gender politics is fun.
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:50,063 Seems kind of like a loaded topic.
00:03:50,146 --> 00:03:52,815 Everyone on the internet is always fighting about who can be president
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:54,609 or who can bust ghosts, but good luck.
00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:58,529 It is not loaded! Gender issues are a totally normal thing to mess with.
00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:03,534 Come on, Yumyulack, don't be like that. Don't be such a man.
00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:06,120 Hey, do you guys mind if I borrow the boomerang?
00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:09,624 - Whoa, what's going on in here? - Welcome to our "manc ave."
00:04:09,707 --> 00:04:11,334 Man cave!
00:04:11,459 --> 00:04:13,086 Ah, ah, ah, there are rules.
00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:15,964 Please read and strictly abide by all of them before having fun.
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:18,049 Man only? Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.
00:04:18,132 --> 00:04:19,384 Are you guys doing a gender thing, too?
00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:21,636 What? No. We're doing a "manc ave" thing.
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:23,388 - What's "dig old bicks"? - I don't know.
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:26,808 Some sort of human code. They were out of "tig old bitties" signs
00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:29,227 but the salesman said it was in the same area, so...
00:04:29,310 --> 00:04:30,353 [whirring]
00:04:30,436 --> 00:04:32,063 Pretty great, right? Just like Kevin's.
00:04:32,146 --> 00:04:33,898 No, yeah, I love how it moves up and down.
00:04:33,982 --> 00:04:35,316 Oh, it keeps you guessing.
00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:37,443 Ah, football is amazing.
00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,529 Apparently, we can watch jets battle the color brown.
00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:43,074 This is a color brown house. We are color brown fans under this roof.
00:04:43,199 --> 00:04:44,284 - Got it? - It's brown town, baby.
00:04:44,409 --> 00:04:47,203 Now everybody just sit back, grab a cold one,
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:50,373 and let the awesomeness of the "manc ave" wash over them.
00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:52,292 [football game on TV, indistinct]
00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:55,837 Any second now.
00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:58,756 FISH: Help me.
00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:00,550 [grunting]
00:05:00,675 --> 00:05:01,801 [whistle tweets]
00:05:01,884 --> 00:05:05,096 Oh, hello, I'm a female and I'm looking for a patriarchy to topple.
00:05:05,179 --> 00:05:08,808 I've never played this game, but can I be your kicker, please?
00:05:08,891 --> 00:05:10,768 [laughs] No way.
00:05:10,893 --> 00:05:13,813 A ha! You're freaking out that I would fundamentally alter
00:05:13,896 --> 00:05:17,650 the way society felt about women in a male-dominated sport.
00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,319 Gotcha, suckers!
00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:22,405 What? No. Girls have played on high school football teams for years.
00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:24,699 You just can't be the kicker because we already went
00:05:24,782 --> 00:05:27,994 to the state supreme court so a dog could be kicker.
00:05:28,119 --> 00:05:31,581 Damn, Denver! Good boy, good boy.
00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:33,583 You can be our starting quarterback. How about that?
00:05:33,708 --> 00:05:36,961 Hey, Dylan! This girl who I haven't seen play yet is taking your place.
00:05:37,045 --> 00:05:39,505 I'm fine with that. It's not about winning. Woo!
00:05:39,630 --> 00:05:43,384 Ugh, finding a new struggle for women is gonna be a real struggle.
00:05:43,509 --> 00:05:46,637 Hm, has the awesomeness of the "manc ave" washed over you yet?
00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:47,847 Um, I don't think so.
00:05:47,930 --> 00:05:49,557 Maybe it happened and we just didn't notice yet?
00:05:49,640 --> 00:05:51,517 No, this is wrong. Something's missing, Terry.
00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:53,811 There has to be something Kevin had in his "ave" that we don't have.
00:05:53,895 --> 00:05:57,023 No, no, I know. I mean, we have very man-centric movie posters
00:05:57,106 --> 00:05:59,776 with man themes like Boys Don't Cry, Boys On The Side,
00:05:59,901 --> 00:06:01,944 <i>How To Lose a Guy in Ten Days.</i>
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,989 Terry, pull up a live hologram feed of Kevin's "manc ave."
00:06:05,073 --> 00:06:06,991 [whooshing]
00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:09,243 See, I don't get it. It's exactly the same.
00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:11,162 Computer, analyze nitrogen levels and--
00:06:11,245 --> 00:06:13,664 Can you please come watch your son blow out his candles?
00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:16,834 - Everyone's waiting. - Oh, he'll be three for like a whole year.
00:06:16,918 --> 00:06:18,336 - Kevin. - What kind of cake?
00:06:18,419 --> 00:06:19,921 - Kevin! - All right!
00:06:20,004 --> 00:06:22,548 -[groans] - God, I hate this man cave.
00:06:22,673 --> 00:06:24,258 Computer, strip everything but Angela.
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:27,053 He spends all of his time in his stupid room full of toys
00:06:27,136 --> 00:06:30,264 instead of with his family. I should have married Omry.
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,934 Terry, we were totally missing the point of "manc aves."
00:06:33,017 --> 00:06:34,769 Oh, that we need to throw way more birthday parties?
00:06:34,852 --> 00:06:36,604 The best part of being in a "manc ave," Terry,
00:06:36,687 --> 00:06:39,607 is someone being irritated that you're in a "manc ave."
00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:41,567 - But I don't wanna take turns in here. - Neither do I.
00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:43,152 Which means we'll have to
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:45,738 build a robot that hates us being in the "manc ave."
00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:47,156 [both cheering]
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,658 - Yeah! - Terry!
00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:51,244 - By "we," you mean you, right? - Yes, I'm going to be doing all the work.
00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:52,537 I was just trying to be nice.
00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:54,580 Behold, our new robot.
00:06:54,705 --> 00:06:56,249 - Wow, that was fast. - I used a lot of parts
00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:57,291 from the last robot I made.
00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,877 The one that was supposed to kill those kids who threw a cup of pee at you?
00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:01,170 - You got over that? - For the moment,
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,296 they may keep their lives.
00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:03,589 Well, I tell you what, here's the headline.
00:07:03,673 --> 00:07:06,259 It looks great. Now did you use the specs I gave you
00:07:06,342 --> 00:07:08,386 to make her the perfect combo of every TV wife/mom?
00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:10,263 Yes, she's 20 percent annoyed wife from Raymond,
00:07:10,346 --> 00:07:12,432 twenty percent doting hot mom from Modern Family,
00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:14,642 fifteen percent fast-talking Gilmore Girls mom
00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:17,186 and ten percent Marge Simpson because she's got blue hair.
00:07:17,311 --> 00:07:19,272 - Is that too many percents? - No, it's, it's under actually.
00:07:19,355 --> 00:07:22,775 The rest is just filler code, except for a pinch of Sophia from Golden Girls.
00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:25,319 That was one sassy old lady, you know? I couldn't resist.
00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:26,821 Twenty-five, 83...
00:07:26,904 --> 00:07:29,407 Are you using your abaca-dactals like a baby?
00:07:29,490 --> 00:07:32,118 - What, what are you, 80? - Ah, now I have to start over.
00:07:32,243 --> 00:07:34,871 I call her P-A-T-R-I-C-I-A.
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:37,790 It stands for Patricia Automated Television Retro-fitted
00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:39,625 Intelligent Companion In Action.
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,335 You know what, it's okay if you made that up to fit.
00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:43,629 You chose a name with two I's and two A's. That's already hard.
00:07:43,713 --> 00:07:45,840 The important thing is not what PATRICIA stands for
00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:48,176 but that she's programmed to hate the "manc ave."
00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:49,385 [whirring]
00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,804 PATRICIA: [gasps] <i>Korvo, Terry.</i>
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,265 <i>Pupa! I hope you don't plan to spend all day</i>
00:07:54,348 --> 00:07:57,435 <i>in your awful, disgusting "manc ave." We have chores to do.</i>
00:07:57,518 --> 00:07:59,520 - Why are didgeridoos so expensive? - What, what?
00:07:59,645 --> 00:08:03,107 Five thousand dollars. It's a tube! Still buying it.
00:08:03,232 --> 00:08:06,235 - Did you guys make a woman robot? - Oh, yeah, awesome, right?
00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,987 Yeah, we built her to hate the "manc ave."
00:08:08,070 --> 00:08:09,906 I mean, look at how awesome she is. Look at her, look at her go.
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,282 - She's hatin' it perfect. - No, no, no.
00:08:11,365 --> 00:08:12,909 You guys are wading into a whole gender thing.
00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:14,994 I'm telling you, this can't end well for anybody.
00:08:15,077 --> 00:08:16,120 I'm outta here. G'day.
00:08:16,245 --> 00:08:18,372 - This isn't a gender thing-- - I said g'day!
00:08:18,456 --> 00:08:21,417 No matter what the problem is, she finds a way to blame the "manc ave."
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,212 - Just, just like a real wife. - PATRICIA: I fucking hate this "manc ave."
00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:26,589 Oh, she makes me wanna go in there so bad!
00:08:26,672 --> 00:08:29,008 - Ah, yeah! - KORVO: Oh, ho, ho, it worked!
00:08:29,091 --> 00:08:30,384 [Pupa burps]
00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:35,806 Hi, guys. I, a girl, would like to be on your men's lacrosse team.
00:08:35,890 --> 00:08:38,142 I also know nothing about lacrosse.
00:08:38,226 --> 00:08:40,478 - Ha ha, did you hear that? - Oh, I heard it, Chad.
00:08:40,561 --> 00:08:42,355 But I don't believe it. Say it again, girl.
00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:45,107 Lacrosse is French for "date rape" no longer.
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:48,027 I demand to be on your boys' team. What's the problem?
00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:50,863 Can't stand a girl trying to step on your "boys only" field?
00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:53,574 No, we've been asking for a girl to join our team for years.
00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:55,785 Oh, the football guys will finally stop mocking us.
00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:57,954 No, come on, I need this to be a struggle.
00:08:58,079 --> 00:08:59,830 Chads, we got a girl on the team!
00:08:59,914 --> 00:09:01,040 [cheering]
00:09:01,123 --> 00:09:03,668 - Hey, stop. -[groaning]
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:09,048 Attention, esports team. I know that gamers are misogynistic,
00:09:09,131 --> 00:09:12,969 and that's why all female bodies in games have unrealistic proportions
00:09:13,052 --> 00:09:16,472 and are programmed to give the gamer an unhealthy amount of eye contact.
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,724 - Let me in. - Yeah, another girl!
00:09:18,808 --> 00:09:21,060 Wait, am I the only guy in here? Oh, no.
00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:23,563 I've been using some very coded language.
00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:24,564 [bell rings]
00:09:24,647 --> 00:09:27,358 Australian music is so good. It's like a whole genre.
00:09:27,441 --> 00:09:31,028 You're looking at this town's first female firefighter.
00:09:31,153 --> 00:09:33,698 I found my glass ceiling and fucking shattered it,
00:09:33,781 --> 00:09:35,074 and saved most of a family.
00:09:35,157 --> 00:09:37,910 Well, I'm the first woman to mansplain jazz.
00:09:37,994 --> 00:09:40,162 It's, like, all about syncopation.
00:09:40,288 --> 00:09:42,832 That's great and all, but I saved most of a family.
00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:44,750 Why do you keep saying "most of a family"?
00:09:44,875 --> 00:09:47,753 Because it sounds better than just the two dogs.
00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:49,338 Oh, Yumyulack, come here.
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,592 If I can't find a glass ceiling to break soon,
00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:55,344 they're all gonna get broken without me, and then I'm gonna fail,
00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:57,638 and then they're gonna put me in the dumb kid's class in room B.
00:09:57,722 --> 00:09:59,932 Room B is awesome. We get to do art all day.
00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:03,269 And stop telling me things. I already said I wasn't touching gender stuff.
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,604 I'm just out of ideas.
00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:06,314 You know what I do when I'm out of ideas?
00:10:06,397 --> 00:10:09,358 Cocaine. And then I get like, a million ideas at once.
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:10,901 [grunts]
00:10:10,985 --> 00:10:13,779 Ooh, ooh, I got it. Pants that fly but are also dogs.
00:10:13,904 --> 00:10:14,822 Hm.
00:10:15,531 --> 00:10:18,075 Well, I do love cocaine, but isn't it illegal?
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:20,703 Everything cool is illegal! Besides, cocaine is okay for us to eat
00:10:20,786 --> 00:10:22,413 because our alien bodies process it differently.
00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:23,706 It's just like sugar. I make it myself.
00:10:23,831 --> 00:10:27,126 Yumyulack, that's it! I should make a glass ceiling myself.
00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:29,003 - And then I'll break it. - Hey, come on.
00:10:29,086 --> 00:10:32,298 I didn't help with that epiphany. I'm just eating cocaine like we usually do.
00:10:32,381 --> 00:10:34,467 - Leave me out of it. - Thanks for your help, Yumyulack!
00:10:34,550 --> 00:10:37,053 Stop it! I'm gonna go fight my shadow!
00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:38,220 [giggles]
00:10:42,099 --> 00:10:45,478 Ah, PATRICIA, I bet you hate how we sit in the "manc ave" all day
00:10:45,561 --> 00:10:48,606 while you're up here not enjoying the "manc ave."
00:10:48,689 --> 00:10:50,650 PATRICIA: <i>What's with all the dirty dishes, Korvo?</i>
00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:52,276 I left them here for you to clean.
00:10:52,401 --> 00:10:54,362 PATRICIA: You see this here? It's called a dishwasher.
00:10:54,445 --> 00:10:57,531 And this is how you turn it on. [gasps] Ooh!
00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:00,368 Now that's at least one thing you can finally learn to turn on.
00:11:00,451 --> 00:11:03,204 Not that it matters since you're an alien who has no dick.
00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:05,873 I guess my mom was right. What am I supposed to do with that?
00:11:05,956 --> 00:11:08,125 - No dick! -[laugh track plays]
00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:10,044 No one's ever spoken to me like that.
00:11:10,127 --> 00:11:12,213 This angry wife subroutine must be a side effect
00:11:12,296 --> 00:11:14,173 of your anti-"manc ave" programming.
00:11:14,298 --> 00:11:17,009 PATRICIA: Or maybe I'm just tired of being married to an idiot
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:18,511 who leaves his dirty socks in the living room.
00:11:18,594 --> 00:11:19,512 [audience groans playing]
00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,681 This must be a byproduct from all the TV mom data
00:11:21,764 --> 00:11:24,600 I fed into your personality. You're a perfect organism.
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:27,895 PATRICIA: Byproduct? You don't make enough money to buy me any products.
00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:31,315 And the only time I can organism is when I'm watching <i>Outlander.</i>
00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:33,567 You're making me feel smaller and less of a man.
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:35,403 I love it. Quick, do it again.
00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:38,280 PATRICIA: Quick is the only way you know how to do anything.
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:39,407 [laugh track plays]
00:11:40,825 --> 00:11:41,867 [coos]
00:11:41,992 --> 00:11:45,121 Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, PATRICIA. I foosed my shoulder.
00:11:46,997 --> 00:11:49,250 PATRICIA: Aw, honey, let me take care of that for you.
00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:50,501 One, two--
00:11:50,584 --> 00:11:52,670 [yells]
00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:54,880 Owie.
00:11:55,005 --> 00:11:57,133 - Does that feel better? - A little.
00:11:57,216 --> 00:11:59,844 PATRICIA: You were a really brave little man just then.
00:11:59,927 --> 00:12:02,263 I'm so proud of you. Here.
00:12:02,346 --> 00:12:06,434 That was a special kiss from Mommy. Does that feel better?
00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:09,520 - I need another one. - There you go, sweetie.
00:12:09,603 --> 00:12:12,106 I tell you what, this mommy must be a residual byproduct
00:12:12,189 --> 00:12:13,816 of me being so brave, huh?
00:12:13,941 --> 00:12:17,445 PATRICIA: I'm baking cookies in here. Does baby wanna lick my spoon?
00:12:17,528 --> 00:12:18,863 [moaning]
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:21,949 Oh, my God, what is this feeling I'm feeling?
00:12:22,032 --> 00:12:23,617 Oh, I never want it to end.
00:12:23,701 --> 00:12:26,078 [audience awws]
00:12:26,203 --> 00:12:27,163 [bell rings]
00:12:28,038 --> 00:12:30,416 ♪ dramatic music playing ♪
00:12:30,499 --> 00:12:33,335 ♪
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:38,716 - Where have you been? - Oh, oh, uh,
00:12:38,799 --> 00:12:40,176 just making this delicious sundae.
00:12:40,259 --> 00:12:41,218 - By yourself? - Uh-huh.
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:43,387 Terry, you're lying. You don't know how to peel a banana.
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,139 - I always have to do it for you. - Wait.
00:12:45,222 --> 00:12:46,724 Why are your shoulders slouched
00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:48,434 and why do you look like you have a lower sense of confidence?
00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:51,353 I was judging myself in the mirror. I'm-I'm very shameful.
00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:52,521 You don't know how to self-scrutinize.
00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:54,356 I've been hanging out with PATRICIA. She makes me feel something
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:55,858 - I've never felt before. - Me, too.
00:12:55,941 --> 00:12:56,942 - Emasculated. - Nurtured.
00:12:57,026 --> 00:12:59,069 I love the way she can just cut right through me
00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:01,530 with a real tightly wound zinger. I've never been so wonderfully beta.
00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:04,533 Oh, she wipes my mouth with a wet wipe and treats me like a baby.
00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:07,119 It's so comfortable and nurturing. I never had a mom, Korvo.
00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:09,246 - I never got baths. - Terry, I know we specifically
00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:12,082 created her to hate the "manc ave," but hear me out on this.
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:14,168 What if we altered the rules of the "manc ave"
00:13:14,251 --> 00:13:17,338 so we could invite PATRICIA to hang out with us in the "manc ave"?
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:18,714 - We'd have it all, Terry. - Oh, my God, yes.
00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:20,299 Oh, that's perfect. Let's, let's change the rules.
00:13:20,382 --> 00:13:21,967 We're gonna change the rules. Oh!
00:13:22,092 --> 00:13:24,303 PATRICIA: But, but I hate this place.
00:13:24,386 --> 00:13:26,972 I know, I know, but it's okay. Look, huh, see?
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:29,058 It's okay for you to be here. Isn't it fun?
00:13:29,141 --> 00:13:31,811 FISH: No, it's not. Get out while you can. Run.
00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:35,147 Ignore that fish, it's joking. It's not serious. It's just having a jab.
00:13:37,191 --> 00:13:39,777 PATRICIA, I demand you overwrite your hate of the "manc ave."
00:13:39,902 --> 00:13:42,696 PATRICIA: Override, ov-er-ride...
00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,949 funny, you never ride me over.
00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:45,950 - BOTH: Ooh. -[laugh track plays]
00:13:46,075 --> 00:13:48,661 PATRICIA: Can't-love-manc-ave-dig-old-bicks
00:13:48,744 --> 00:13:49,870 [stammering]
00:13:49,995 --> 00:13:51,080 [alarm blaring]
00:13:51,163 --> 00:13:53,624 ♪ dramatic music playing ♪
00:13:53,749 --> 00:13:56,585 ♪
00:13:56,710 --> 00:13:59,839 PATRICIA: Must destroy manc ave!
00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:03,968 You gave her rocket launchers?
00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:07,596 It's harder to build a robot without them, Terry. They're load-bearing.
00:14:12,142 --> 00:14:13,769 -[grunts] - Uh-oh.
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:17,314 Oh, dig old bicks. I get it now.
00:14:17,398 --> 00:14:19,984 - You do? What, what does it mean? - I don't know.
00:14:21,610 --> 00:14:23,320 ♪ dramatic music playing ♪
00:14:23,404 --> 00:14:25,406 ♪
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:33,205 <i>♪ I got the eye of the tiger ♪</i>
00:14:33,289 --> 00:14:37,167 <i>♪ I am dancing through the fire ♪</i>
00:14:37,293 --> 00:14:39,670 <i>♪ I am the champion ♪</i>
00:14:39,753 --> 00:14:44,508 <i>♪ And you're gonna hear me roar ♪</i>
00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:47,678 <i>♪ Louder, louder than a lion ♪</i>
00:14:47,761 --> 00:14:50,055 <i>♪ 'Cause I am the champion ♪</i>
00:14:50,639 --> 00:14:53,851 [flatly] Oh, no, please, stop. Second door on the left.
00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:58,022 Oh, no.
00:14:58,147 --> 00:14:59,398 [bell rings]
00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:02,943 Excuse me, pardon me. Female feminist hero comin' through.
00:15:03,027 --> 00:15:07,948 Move aside, men. I, a woman, have arrived to topple the glass ceiling
00:15:08,032 --> 00:15:10,367 and shatter the fuck out of the patriarchy.
00:15:10,492 --> 00:15:13,037 Yeah, we're looking for Jesse, the guy who set up this club.
00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:16,707 Well, I've got news for you. Jesse isn't a boy.
00:15:16,790 --> 00:15:18,500 He's a girl, and it's me.
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:20,336 Whoa, whoa, whoa. This is your club?
00:15:20,419 --> 00:15:23,213 Yep, sorry, but this isn't a boy club after all.
00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:24,924 We don't wanna join. We're here in protest
00:15:25,007 --> 00:15:27,426 to speak up for all the women who are too weak to speak for themselves.
00:15:27,551 --> 00:15:29,303 - But I made this club to-- - Do you have any idea
00:15:29,386 --> 00:15:30,888 how messed up it is to discriminate against people
00:15:30,971 --> 00:15:32,473 - based on their gender? - Uh, yeah.
00:15:32,556 --> 00:15:34,642 I was just about to say that when you interrupted--
00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:37,269 As the brother of two sisters, nothing enrages me more
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:39,521 than misogyny, and this is misogyny.
00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:40,689 - Uh-huh, it's not. - Yes, it is.
00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:42,316 You need to shut this club down right now.
00:15:42,399 --> 00:15:45,319 No, not before I topple it. I need it for my grade.
00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:47,738 If she's not gonna do it, we have to tear it down ourselves.
00:15:47,863 --> 00:15:49,114 - Please, stop. - Let's get her
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:51,492 before she creates an unsafe environment for all women.
00:15:51,575 --> 00:15:53,077 - Oh, no, no, no. - She's running.
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:56,580 - That means she's guilty. - Angry mob, bros.
00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:57,998 [sobs]
00:16:01,835 --> 00:16:03,921 She's ruining the only thing I actually liked about humans.
00:16:04,004 --> 00:16:05,631 - We need to stop her. - TERRY: Okay, I say we just
00:16:05,714 --> 00:16:07,633 grab her and make her tuck us into bed and read us stories.
00:16:07,716 --> 00:16:09,593 We can't just grab her, Terry. She'll slice us in half
00:16:09,677 --> 00:16:12,012 - with her laser blades. - And whose fault is that?
00:16:12,137 --> 00:16:13,722 - Huh? - KORVO: I don't know what to do.
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:16,016 Wait, if she hates the "manc aves," we need to lure her
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,519 to the biggest, stupidest "manc ave" we can find.
00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:20,938 I know just the place.
00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:24,066 [men screaming]
00:16:24,149 --> 00:16:26,402 ♪ sports arena music playing ♪
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:27,653 Oh!
00:16:27,736 --> 00:16:30,572 ♪
00:16:38,205 --> 00:16:39,415 Oh, crap, here she comes.
00:16:40,791 --> 00:16:41,709 Get inside.
00:16:49,591 --> 00:16:51,343 [people screaming]
00:16:54,555 --> 00:16:56,265 ♪ dramatic music playing ♪
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:58,225 [lasers firing]
00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:17,578 The activation ring. We have to get it off her finger.
00:17:17,661 --> 00:17:18,996 - Aim for the ring. - How many tickets
00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:22,374 - for all your sticky hands? - I don't know. Like, a million. Hey!
00:17:22,458 --> 00:17:25,002 Those come out of the tickets they pay me with.
00:17:26,962 --> 00:17:27,838 Now!
00:17:27,963 --> 00:17:29,840 ♪
00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:43,145 [lasers firing]
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:46,690 - Ms. Perez, Ms. Perez! - Jesse, what are you doing here?
00:17:46,815 --> 00:17:48,609 School stuff. You wouldn't understand!
00:17:48,692 --> 00:17:49,943 Get down!
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:52,738 Ms. Perez, I tried to make a glass ceiling to break,
00:17:52,821 --> 00:17:55,657 but a bunch of male allies got mad. You gotta help me.
00:17:55,783 --> 00:17:57,159 What the fuck are you talking about?
00:17:57,284 --> 00:18:00,120 I couldn't move us women forward, Ms. Perez. Please don't give me an F.
00:18:00,245 --> 00:18:01,580 I didn't even realize you were a girl.
00:18:01,705 --> 00:18:03,832 I thought you were gonna draw Count Dooku's lightsaber.
00:18:03,957 --> 00:18:05,459 What? But I have a bow.
00:18:05,584 --> 00:18:07,044 I don't know, you're green and your mouth
00:18:07,127 --> 00:18:09,630 extends past the boundaries of your face. How would I know?
00:18:09,755 --> 00:18:11,840 If you really wanna topple the patriarchy and get an A,
00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:14,009 - this is your chance. - You're right, Ms. Perez.
00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:16,845 Every feminist hero had their robot to conquer.
00:18:16,970 --> 00:18:19,056 ♪ heroic music playing ♪
00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:28,816 PATRICA: Time for you two naughty/disappointing boy men
00:18:28,899 --> 00:18:30,234 to learn a lesson.
00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:34,238 PATRICIA, stop.
00:18:34,321 --> 00:18:36,365 Gender not found.
00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:38,700 That's because I'm an alien plant.
00:18:38,784 --> 00:18:41,537 It took me all this time to realize that's okay.
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:44,873 I can do whatever I want. So can you.
00:18:44,998 --> 00:18:47,543 PATRICIA: But I'm a mom, I'm a wife, I'm a mom, I'm a--
00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:50,379 No way, Jose. You're a killer robot.
00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:53,382 And if that's what makes you happy, then lean into it.
00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:56,927 PATRICIA: I don't have to kill men. I could be killing anyone I want.
00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:59,429 No matter what gender. I could kill everyone!
00:18:59,555 --> 00:19:01,431 Ha, not today.
00:19:01,515 --> 00:19:07,062 PATRICIA: No, I was about to kill all humans in the world...
00:19:07,938 --> 00:19:10,274 Patricia, I'm sorry. But I have to turn you off.
00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:14,444 PATRICIA: You turn me off every day when you take off your shirt.
00:19:14,528 --> 00:19:16,363 What's wrong, Korvo? Why-why'd you stop?
00:19:16,446 --> 00:19:19,449 I can't deactivate her, Terry. I didn't realize I had a hole in my heart.
00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:21,743 A hole that needed to be demeaned with a non-stop barrage
00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:25,956 of insults and sexual criticism. We can't kill her, but we can't live with her.
00:19:26,039 --> 00:19:27,291 So what do we do?
00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:30,169 We started this thinking we needed a "manc ave"
00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:32,254 to fill a gaping hole inside of us.
00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:33,881 But what we truly needed was to know
00:19:33,964 --> 00:19:36,550 that we have different types of gaping holes
00:19:36,633 --> 00:19:38,552 that need other ways to be filled.
00:19:38,677 --> 00:19:40,804 You taught us that we don't have to hide in an "ave," Mom.
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,181 - Thank you. - We can't kill you
00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:44,308 and we can't have you going around and setting stuff on fire.
00:19:44,391 --> 00:19:46,476 So from now on, you'll live in this shipping container.
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:48,187 Do we really have to get rid of her?
00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:50,898 Maybe we can keep her around like a feminist icon.
00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:53,525 Your dress is too short. Boys will think you're a slut.
00:19:53,609 --> 00:19:55,152 You're not my real mom! Shut up!
00:19:55,235 --> 00:19:57,279 Patricia, it's time to get in the container.
00:19:57,362 --> 00:20:00,282 Don't worry, you won't be bored. I made you a cuck-bot for company.
00:20:00,365 --> 00:20:03,368 CUCK: Does anyone want to go to the Gap and make some returns?
00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:05,370 I didn't try to make him look like Ted Cruz.
00:20:05,454 --> 00:20:06,872 It just happens with these things.
00:20:06,955 --> 00:20:08,749 - CUCK: Hello. - PATRICIA: You're wearing that?
00:20:08,832 --> 00:20:11,752 I thought I threw that out. Why are you making that face?
00:20:11,877 --> 00:20:13,754 - CUCK: I'm not making a face. - PATRICIA: God, you're annoying.
00:20:13,837 --> 00:20:16,632 Could you be more nasal? A real man wouldn't let an alien
00:20:16,715 --> 00:20:18,842 bury him in a shipping container.
00:20:18,967 --> 00:20:20,552 It's nice to know that any time we miss her,
00:20:20,636 --> 00:20:23,764 we can come outside and we know that she's just a few feet down there
00:20:23,847 --> 00:20:25,474 just ripping into him, you know?
00:20:25,557 --> 00:20:28,268 On how he brushes his teeth, and how he doesn't arch his back properly.
00:20:28,352 --> 00:20:30,520 The way he stands all crooked and how he's all weasley
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:33,273 and thin and not muscly or anything.
00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:36,026 - Yeah. - Wow, I just had the craziest week.
00:20:36,109 --> 00:20:38,654 Oh, yeah, you weren't around. What were you doing this whole time?
00:20:38,779 --> 00:20:41,073 I accidentally let hundreds of koalas out of the zoo
00:20:41,156 --> 00:20:43,533 and then spent a ton of time rounding them all up.
00:20:43,659 --> 00:20:46,495 The zoo has the capacity to house hundreds of koalas?
00:20:46,578 --> 00:20:50,499 Yeah, they were running all over town. I had to coax them with didgeridoos.
00:20:50,582 --> 00:20:54,127 It was on the news. Like, you-you didn't see any of that?
00:20:54,211 --> 00:20:55,212 <i>[grunting]</i>
00:20:55,295 --> 00:20:57,005 <i>Okay, get in, get in here, get in.</i>
00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:58,966 Hey, so how did your gender-based stories turn out?
00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:01,551 Uh, good, yeah. I mean, I think we covered every angle
00:21:01,635 --> 00:21:03,136 and pretty much solved it, so.
00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:06,056 Yeah, I think everyone will be very happy with what we did.
00:21:06,139 --> 00:21:08,016 Well, I'm glad we survived, because I don't think
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:10,686 there's a more controversial topic we could have dealt with.
00:21:10,811 --> 00:21:12,562 Okay, class. Next assignment,
00:21:12,646 --> 00:21:15,983 everyone here has to find a racist and teach them the error of their ways.
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:17,567 Yay!
00:21:17,693 --> 00:21:19,486 ♪
00:22:02,029 --> 00:22:03,405 [imitating laser fire]

00:00:29,082 --> 00:00:31,728 Боже-боже-боже! У нас нет носов!
00:00:33,044 --> 00:00:37,518 Планета Шлорп была идеальной утопией. Пока не упал астероид.
00:00:38,249 --> 00:00:40,687 Сто взрослых и их репликанты взяли Пупу
00:00:40,688 --> 00:00:42,678 и сбежали в космос
00:00:42,679 --> 00:00:45,304 в поисках нового дома в незаселённых мирах.
00:00:45,724 --> 00:00:48,726 Мы упали на Землю и застряли на перенаселённой планете.
00:00:48,727 --> 00:00:50,355 Верно. Это говорю я.
00:00:50,356 --> 00:00:52,158 Я держу Пупу. Я Корво.
00:00:52,160 --> 00:00:54,143 И это моё шоу. Я бросил Пупу.
00:00:54,144 --> 00:00:55,983 Видите меня? Это смешно.
00:00:55,984 --> 00:00:57,904 Ненавижу Землю. Это ужасный дом.
00:00:57,905 --> 00:01:00,571 Люди глупые. Зачем придумали столько языков?
00:01:00,572 --> 00:01:02,698 Почему не создали один,
00:01:02,699 --> 00:01:05,339 чтобы я мог заказать сырную трубочку в мексиканском ресторане
00:01:05,340 --> 00:01:06,993 и никто не закатывал бы глаза.
00:01:06,994 --> 00:01:11,393 ОБРАТНАЯ СТОРОНА ЗЕМЛИ
00:01:16,672 --> 00:01:18,714 Это Кевин. У него что-то крутое.
00:01:18,715 --> 00:01:20,885 Я тоже хочу. Я хочу то, что у Кевина.
00:01:20,886 --> 00:01:22,885 Что это? Выглядит здорово.
00:01:22,886 --> 00:01:23,887 Идём, идём.
00:01:23,888 --> 00:01:26,910 Не думал, что она будет такой тяжёлой.
00:01:26,911 --> 00:01:29,892 О! Корво, Терри-похожий-на-Гарри.
00:01:29,893 --> 00:01:31,312 — Если бы. — Помочь тебе
00:01:31,313 --> 00:01:32,978 с твоим знаком "Сольшие биськи"?
00:01:32,980 --> 00:01:35,125 Это что-то католическое?
00:01:35,647 --> 00:01:36,608 Нет.
00:01:36,609 --> 00:01:38,901 "Сольшие биськи", поняли?
00:01:38,902 --> 00:01:41,404 Подумайте. "Соль-ши-е бись-ки".
00:01:41,405 --> 00:01:43,072 — А, да. — Я догадался.
00:01:43,073 --> 00:01:44,532 Это значит, что биськи сольшие.
00:01:44,533 --> 00:01:45,994 Это значит, они сольшие.
00:01:45,995 --> 00:01:47,493 Прикол для моей берлоги.
00:01:47,494 --> 00:01:50,079 О, что за берлога?
00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:53,874 Это она. Здесь я могу скрыться ото всего.
00:01:53,875 --> 00:01:56,361 Только здесь я могу свободно быть самим собой.
00:01:56,362 --> 00:01:58,264 Пинбольный автомат по "Святым из Бундока".
00:01:58,997 --> 00:02:00,630 И классический окунь.
00:02:00,631 --> 00:02:02,591 <i>Отпусти меня в озеро</i>
00:02:02,592 --> 00:02:04,635 Что? Он разговаривает.
00:02:04,636 --> 00:02:05,899 Удивительная рыба.
00:02:05,900 --> 00:02:08,436 О, правила. Первое. Мужчина всегда прав.
00:02:08,437 --> 00:02:10,391 Второе. Спорт – это жизнь.
00:02:10,392 --> 00:02:11,393 Не слышал о таких.
00:02:11,394 --> 00:02:13,176 Не хочу ограничиваться правилами.
00:02:13,177 --> 00:02:16,235 А это лучшее. Готовы к потрясению?
00:02:16,236 --> 00:02:19,567 О боже!
00:02:19,568 --> 00:02:20,985 — Ну вот. — Класс!
00:02:20,986 --> 00:02:23,029 — Готово. — Кевин, ты идёшь?
00:02:23,030 --> 00:02:26,699 О, ты потратил три тысячи на женоненавистническую надпись?
00:02:26,700 --> 00:02:27,831 Да что с тобой?
00:02:27,832 --> 00:02:30,633 Как потратить рождественскую премию — моё дело.
00:02:31,246 --> 00:02:32,872 Корво, давай начистоту.
00:02:32,873 --> 00:02:35,017 Пожалуйста-пожалуйста, можно нам берлогу?
00:02:35,018 --> 00:02:36,500 — Да. — Что? Правда?
00:02:36,501 --> 00:02:38,669 Ты должен был отказать, а я — предложить тебе себя.
00:02:38,670 --> 00:02:41,254 Кевин уверен в себе. Он работал над собой.
00:02:41,270 --> 00:02:44,468 Представь, как мы жили бы, будь мы так уверены в себе.
00:02:44,968 --> 00:02:48,137 — Видели? Мяч — это кег? — Заткнись. Мы представляем.
00:02:48,138 --> 00:02:49,546 СТАРШАЯ ШКОЛА НА ПРОДАЖУ
00:02:49,547 --> 00:02:51,434 Коретта Скотт Кинг и Джилл Солоуэй —
00:02:51,435 --> 00:02:53,017 это две феминистки,
00:02:53,018 --> 00:02:55,147 которые значительно улучшили жизнь женщин.
00:02:55,148 --> 00:02:57,438 Дамы, оценка в этом семестре
00:02:57,439 --> 00:02:59,695 зависит от вашей борьбы с патриархатом.
00:02:59,696 --> 00:03:03,255 К пятнице жду от вас отчеты о разбитых стеклянных потолках.
00:03:03,256 --> 00:03:04,737 Что это значит?
00:03:04,738 --> 00:03:06,746 Мисс Перес, а что делать мальчикам?
00:03:06,747 --> 00:03:09,492 Неважно. Можете просто нарисовать световой меч.
00:03:09,493 --> 00:03:11,911 Вы должны понять, что ваша жизнь проще.
00:03:11,912 --> 00:03:14,496 Не забудьте оставить чаевые в приложении учителей.
00:03:14,497 --> 00:03:17,083 Мне нужно лекарство от астмы.
00:03:17,084 --> 00:03:18,462 Я живу рядом с карьером.
00:03:18,463 --> 00:03:21,712 Ну вот! Что мне делать? Я решила быть девочкой,
00:03:21,713 --> 00:03:24,342 чтобы в забегаловках мне давали игрушки получше.
00:03:24,343 --> 00:03:26,008 А теперь надо что-то крушить.
00:03:26,009 --> 00:03:28,138 Я говорил, не выбирай женщину.
00:03:28,139 --> 00:03:31,013 Я пытался объяснить тебе это, когда стал мужчиной
00:03:31,014 --> 00:03:32,466 и стал лучше всё объяснять.
00:03:32,467 --> 00:03:36,561 Я должна найти стеклянный потолок и разбить его вдребезги.
00:03:36,562 --> 00:03:40,398 Иначе получится, что Джилл Солоуэй зря сняла "Я люблю Дика".
00:03:40,399 --> 00:03:42,650 О, поможешь? Сделаем это вместе?
00:03:42,651 --> 00:03:43,978 Нет. Я пас.
00:03:43,979 --> 00:03:46,075 Займусь обычными инопланетными делами.
00:03:46,076 --> 00:03:48,241 Брось! Гендерная политика — это весело.
00:03:48,242 --> 00:03:49,949 Похоже, это непростая тема.
00:03:49,950 --> 00:03:52,785 В интернете постоянно спорят, кто может быть президентом
00:03:52,786 --> 00:03:56,080 — и ловить привидений. Удачи. — Там всё просто.
00:03:56,081 --> 00:03:58,541 Заниматься гендерными проблемами — это нормально.
00:03:58,542 --> 00:04:03,546 Брось, Юмьюлак! Не будь таким! Не веди себя так по-мужски!
00:04:03,547 --> 00:04:06,176 Эй, парни, одолжите бумеранг.
00:04:06,177 --> 00:04:07,717 О, что здесь происходит?
00:04:07,718 --> 00:04:11,345 — Добро пожаловать в берлогу. — Берлога!
00:04:11,346 --> 00:04:13,097 Есть правила.
00:04:13,098 --> 00:04:15,977 Прочитай их, прежде чем веселиться, и строго соблюдай.
00:04:15,978 --> 00:04:18,060 Только мужчины? О-о-о,
00:04:18,061 --> 00:04:19,644 у вас тоже гендерная политика?
00:04:19,645 --> 00:04:21,647 Что? Нет, у нас просто берлога.
00:04:21,648 --> 00:04:23,777 — Что за "шлинный дланг"? — Не знаю.
00:04:23,778 --> 00:04:26,823 Какой-то шифр. "Сольшие биськи" закончились.
00:04:26,824 --> 00:04:29,596 Но продавец сказал, это из той же серии.
00:04:30,407 --> 00:04:32,076 Здорово? Как у Кевина.
00:04:32,077 --> 00:04:33,914 Да. Мне нравится, как он ездит.
00:04:33,915 --> 00:04:35,327 Держит в напряжении.
00:04:35,329 --> 00:04:37,456 Футбол — это прекрасно.
00:04:37,457 --> 00:04:39,546 Смотрите, как чёрные обыграют коричневых.
00:04:39,547 --> 00:04:43,085 Это дом коричневых. Мы фанаты коричневых,
00:04:43,086 --> 00:04:44,349 — ясно? — Это город коричневых!
00:04:44,350 --> 00:04:47,216 Все садитесь, берите по одной холодной
00:04:47,217 --> 00:04:50,580 и погрузитесь с головой в улётность берлоги.
00:04:53,930 --> 00:04:55,848 Уже почти.
00:04:55,849 --> 00:04:58,305 На помощь!
00:05:01,313 --> 00:05:05,107 Привет. Я женщина и хочу уничтожить патриархат.
00:05:05,108 --> 00:05:08,739 Никогда не играла в это. Но можно, я стану вашим кикером?
00:05:09,899 --> 00:05:10,782 Ни за что.
00:05:10,783 --> 00:05:13,824 Ага! Вы боитесь, что я полностью изменю
00:05:13,825 --> 00:05:17,666 представления общества о женщинах в спорте, где доминируют мужчины.
00:05:17,667 --> 00:05:19,330 Попались, придурки!
00:05:19,331 --> 00:05:22,416 Что? Нет. Девочки много лет играют в школьных командах.
00:05:22,417 --> 00:05:24,714 Но ты не можешь быть кикером, потому что мы добились
00:05:24,715 --> 00:05:27,697 через суд, чтобы кикером стала собака.
00:05:28,006 --> 00:05:31,802 Черт, Денвер! Молодец! Молодец!
00:05:31,803 --> 00:05:33,865 Будешь нашим главным защитником.
00:05:33,866 --> 00:05:36,975 Дилан, не знаю, как она играет, но она займёт твоё место.
00:05:36,976 --> 00:05:39,518 Я не против. Победа — не главное!
00:05:39,519 --> 00:05:43,398 Найти проблемы для женщин будет проблематично.
00:05:43,399 --> 00:05:46,653 Хм. Вы уже погрузились в улётность берлоги?
00:05:46,654 --> 00:05:47,900 Э, не думаю.
00:05:47,901 --> 00:05:49,568 Может, погрузились, но не заметили?
00:05:49,569 --> 00:05:51,530 Нет, всё не так. Мы что-то упустили.
00:05:51,531 --> 00:05:54,233 В берлоге Кевина было что-то, чего нет у нас.
00:05:54,235 --> 00:05:56,992 Нет-нет, я знаю! У нас много постеров
00:05:56,994 --> 00:05:59,787 на мужские темы: "Парни не плачут", "Парни побоку",
00:05:59,788 --> 00:06:01,957 "Как отделаться от парня за десять дней".
00:06:01,958 --> 00:06:05,373 Терри, сделай голограмму того, что в берлоге Кевина.
00:06:07,004 --> 00:06:09,256 Я не понимаю. Всё точно так же.
00:06:09,257 --> 00:06:11,175 Компьютер, анализатор воздуха…
00:06:11,176 --> 00:06:13,676 Посмотри, как твой сын задует свечки.
00:06:13,677 --> 00:06:16,849 — Все ждут тебя. — Ему целый год будет три года!
00:06:16,850 --> 00:06:18,347 — Кевин. — Какой торт?
00:06:18,348 --> 00:06:20,127 — Кевин! — Ладно.
00:06:20,909 --> 00:06:22,561 О, ненавижу эту берлогу.
00:06:22,562 --> 00:06:24,704 Компьютер, убери всё, кроме Энджелы.
00:06:24,705 --> 00:06:27,106 Он проводит всё время в дурацкой комнате,
00:06:27,107 --> 00:06:28,485 а не с семьёй.
00:06:28,486 --> 00:06:30,277 Надо было выйти за Генри.
00:06:30,278 --> 00:06:32,945 Терри, мы упустили главное в берлоге.
00:06:32,946 --> 00:06:35,068 Надо отмечать больше дней рождения?
00:06:35,069 --> 00:06:36,949 Главное в берлоге в том, Терри,
00:06:36,950 --> 00:06:39,618 что кого-то раздражает твоё пребывание в ней.
00:06:39,619 --> 00:06:41,802 — Не хочу быть здесь по очереди. — Я тоже.
00:06:41,803 --> 00:06:46,184 Значит, мы построим робота, которому не понравится, что мы в берлоге!
00:06:47,170 --> 00:06:48,919 — Да! — Терри!
00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:51,255 — "Мы" — то есть "ты"? — Да, я всё сделаю.
00:06:51,256 --> 00:06:52,548 Просто был вежлив.
00:06:52,549 --> 00:06:54,593 Встречай, наш новый робот!
00:06:54,594 --> 00:06:57,428 — Как быстро! — Я взял части от прошлого робота.
00:06:57,429 --> 00:07:00,539 Того, что должен был убить детей, бросивших в тебя горшок с мочой?
00:07:00,540 --> 00:07:02,309 Пока сохраню им жизнь.
00:07:02,310 --> 00:07:04,092 Вот что я скажу: "Она прекрасная".
00:07:04,093 --> 00:07:08,397 Ты внедрил в неё характеристики идеальной жены-мамы из телика?
00:07:08,398 --> 00:07:10,381 Да. Она на 20% — зануда из "Рэймонда",
00:07:10,383 --> 00:07:12,488 на 20% — горячая мамочка из "Американской семейки",
00:07:12,489 --> 00:07:14,656 на 15% — мама из "Девочек Гилмор"
00:07:14,657 --> 00:07:17,199 и на 10 — Мардж Симпсон, у нее синие волосы.
00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:19,622 — Не перебор? — Нет. Вообще-то, меньше ста.
00:07:19,623 --> 00:07:22,788 Остальное — коды. И немного Софии из "Золотых девочек".
00:07:22,789 --> 00:07:25,298 Той стильной старушки, помнишь? Я не устоял.
00:07:25,300 --> 00:07:26,832 Двадцать пять, восемьдесят три…
00:07:26,833 --> 00:07:29,418 Считаешь на пальцах, как ребёнок?
00:07:29,419 --> 00:07:32,140 — Тебе что, восемьдесят лет? — О, придётся начать сначала!
00:07:32,141 --> 00:07:34,882 Я назвал её П-А-Т-Р-И-С-И-Я —
00:07:34,883 --> 00:07:38,475 Патрисия Автоматический телевизионный работающий интеллектуальный
00:07:38,476 --> 00:07:39,638 спутник с ядром.
00:07:39,639 --> 00:07:41,308 Здорово, что ты подобрал слова.
00:07:41,309 --> 00:07:43,891 Ты выбрал имя с двумя "И". Это уже непросто.
00:07:43,892 --> 00:07:45,995 Неважно, что значит имя Патрисия.
00:07:45,996 --> 00:07:48,548 Она запрограммирована на ненависть к берлоге.
00:07:49,946 --> 00:07:51,732 Корво, Терри,
00:07:51,733 --> 00:07:54,193 Пупа. Надеюсь, вы не хотите провести весь день
00:07:54,194 --> 00:07:57,446 в вашей отвратительной берлоге. У нас много работы.
00:07:57,447 --> 00:07:59,536 — Почему диджериду такой дорогой? — Что?
00:07:59,537 --> 00:08:03,123 Пять тысяч долларов. Это же дудка. Всё равно куплю.
00:08:03,124 --> 00:08:06,248 — Вы сделали женщину-робота? — Да. Здорово?
00:08:06,249 --> 00:08:07,958 Она ненавидит берлогу.
00:08:07,959 --> 00:08:09,917 Она прекрасна. Посмотри на неё.
00:08:09,918 --> 00:08:11,216 — Она идеальна. — Нет-нет-нет.
00:08:11,217 --> 00:08:13,040 Опять вы с гендерными проблемами.
00:08:13,041 --> 00:08:15,005 Они не доведут до добра.
00:08:15,007 --> 00:08:16,136 Я ухожу. Пока.
00:08:16,137 --> 00:08:18,385 — Какие гендерные проблемы? — Я сказал пока!
00:08:18,386 --> 00:08:21,430 Плевать на проблемы! Она ненавидит берлогу!
00:08:21,431 --> 00:08:24,373 — Как настоящая жена! — Я ненавижу берлогу!
00:08:24,374 --> 00:08:26,600 О, я сразу захотел туда!
00:08:26,601 --> 00:08:29,177 — О да! — Сработало.
00:08:32,186 --> 00:08:35,854 Привет. Я девочка. Хочу играть в вашей команде по лакроссу.
00:08:35,855 --> 00:08:38,232 И я ничего не знаю о лакроссе.
00:08:38,233 --> 00:08:40,612 — Чед, ты это слышал? — Слышал, Чед.
00:08:40,613 --> 00:08:42,402 Но не верю в это. Повтори еще.
00:08:42,403 --> 00:08:45,160 Лакросс — больше не означает "изнасилование".
00:08:45,161 --> 00:08:48,075 Я требую взять меня в команду! Проблемы?
00:08:48,076 --> 00:08:50,915 Не хотите, чтобы девочка ступала на ваше поле?
00:08:50,916 --> 00:08:53,623 Нет. Мы много лет зовём девчонок в нашу команду.
00:08:53,624 --> 00:08:56,019 Футболисты перестанут смеяться над нами.
00:08:56,020 --> 00:08:58,003 Нет, вы должны были быть против.
00:08:58,004 --> 00:09:00,232 Чеды, у нас в команде девочка!
00:09:01,089 --> 00:09:02,529 Эй! Нет!
00:09:05,260 --> 00:09:09,099 Внимание, команда! Я знаю, что геймеры — женоненавистники.
00:09:09,100 --> 00:09:13,016 Поэтому женские персонажи с нереалистичными пропорциями
00:09:13,017 --> 00:09:16,521 и созданы специально для нездорового зрительного контакта.
00:09:16,522 --> 00:09:18,773 — Возьмите меня. — Да! Еще одна девчонка!
00:09:18,774 --> 00:09:21,112 Я здесь единственный парень?
00:09:21,113 --> 00:09:23,974 О, надо будет выбирать фразы попроще.
00:09:24,445 --> 00:09:27,412 Австралийская музыка интересная. Это целый жанр.
00:09:27,413 --> 00:09:31,077 Вы смотрите на первую женщину-пожарного города.
00:09:31,078 --> 00:09:33,747 Я нашла стеклянный потолок и разбила его.
00:09:33,749 --> 00:09:35,206 И спасла почти всю семью.
00:09:35,207 --> 00:09:37,959 Я первая женщина, по-мужски снисходительно обучающая джазу.
00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:40,211 Всё дело в синкопе.
00:09:40,212 --> 00:09:42,882 Здорово, но я спасла почти всю семью.
00:09:42,883 --> 00:09:44,801 Почему ты опять говоришь "почти"?
00:09:44,802 --> 00:09:47,720 Это звучит лучше, чем "только двух собак".
00:09:47,721 --> 00:09:49,885 Юмьюлак, иди сюда.
00:09:50,389 --> 00:09:52,639 Я не могу найти стеклянный потолок.
00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:55,350 Они все выполнят задание, а я провалюсь.
00:09:55,351 --> 00:09:57,895 И меня переведут в класс для тупых детей в кабинет "Б".
00:09:57,896 --> 00:09:59,984 Там здорово. Мы весь день рисуем.
00:09:59,985 --> 00:10:01,232 И хватит об этом.
00:10:01,233 --> 00:10:03,321 Я не занимаюсь гендерными вопросами.
00:10:03,322 --> 00:10:04,724 У меня нет идей.
00:10:04,725 --> 00:10:06,361 Знаешь, что я делаю, когда нет идей?
00:10:06,362 --> 00:10:09,777 Вот что. И сразу приходит миллион идей.
00:10:10,909 --> 00:10:13,828 О-о, я знаю! Летающие штаны и собаки!
00:10:13,829 --> 00:10:14,872 Хм.
00:10:15,551 --> 00:10:18,124 Это хорошо, но разве законно?
00:10:18,125 --> 00:10:19,444 Всё, что круто, — незаконно.
00:10:19,445 --> 00:10:22,564 И потом, процессы в инопланетных организмах идут иначе.
00:10:22,565 --> 00:10:23,852 Для нас это как сахар.
00:10:23,853 --> 00:10:27,175 Юмьюлак, точно! Я сама сделаю стеклянный потолок.
00:10:27,176 --> 00:10:29,054 — А затем разобью его! — Хватит!
00:10:29,055 --> 00:10:30,472 Это не я помог тебе!
00:10:30,473 --> 00:10:32,346 Я просто действую, как обычно.
00:10:32,347 --> 00:10:34,514 — Не впутывай меня. — Спасибо за помощь!
00:10:34,516 --> 00:10:37,471 Хватит! Я буду драться с тенью!
00:10:42,013 --> 00:10:45,479 А, Патрисия, тебе не нравится, что мы сидим в берлоге целый день,
00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:48,090 а тебе нельзя там веселиться?
00:10:48,562 --> 00:10:50,649 Что с грязными тарелками, Корво?
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:52,273 Я поставил их, чтобы ты помыла.
00:10:52,274 --> 00:10:54,417 Видишь это? Это посудомойка.
00:10:54,418 --> 00:10:57,528 Она включается вот так. Ах! О-о!
00:10:57,529 --> 00:11:00,322 Наконец-то, ты хоть что-то научился включать.
00:11:00,323 --> 00:11:03,242 Хотя это неважно, ведь ты пришелец без шланга.
00:11:03,243 --> 00:11:05,828 Моя мама была права. Зачем он мне нужен?
00:11:05,829 --> 00:11:07,194 Без шланга.
00:11:08,123 --> 00:11:10,042 Со мной так никогда не говорили.
00:11:10,043 --> 00:11:12,211 Должно быть, злая жена — побочный эффект
00:11:12,212 --> 00:11:14,170 антиберложной программы.
00:11:14,171 --> 00:11:16,921 А может, я устала быть женой идиота,
00:11:16,923 --> 00:11:19,343 бросающего грязные носки в гостиной?
00:11:19,344 --> 00:11:21,679 Это побочный продукт данных по женщинам,
00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:24,556 которые я добавил в тебя. Ты идеальный организм.
00:11:24,557 --> 00:11:27,932 Продукт? Ты не зарабатываешь нам на продукты.
00:11:27,934 --> 00:11:31,314 И организм у меня бывает, только когда я смотрю "Чужестранку".
00:11:31,315 --> 00:11:33,568 С тобой я не чувствую себя мужчиной.
00:11:33,569 --> 00:11:35,357 Обожаю! Быстрее, давай еще.
00:11:35,358 --> 00:11:38,602 Быстро. Ты только и можешь, что быстро.
00:11:43,364 --> 00:11:45,479 Патрисия! Я проколол плечо!
00:11:46,870 --> 00:11:49,289 О, милый, я позабочусь о тебе.
00:11:49,290 --> 00:11:51,102 Раз, два…
00:11:54,878 --> 00:11:57,257 — Теперь лучше? — Немного.
00:11:57,258 --> 00:11:59,924 Ты так храбро держался, малыш.
00:11:59,925 --> 00:12:02,159 Я так горжусь тобой. Вот.
00:12:02,344 --> 00:12:06,597 Особый поцелуй от мамочки. Теперь лучше?
00:12:06,598 --> 00:12:09,683 — Поцелуй еще раз. — Пожалуйста, милый.
00:12:09,684 --> 00:12:13,438 Эта мамочка, должно быть, побочный продукт моей храбрости.
00:12:13,439 --> 00:12:17,855 Я пеку печенье. Малыш хочет облизать ложку?
00:12:20,237 --> 00:12:22,188 О боже! Что это за чувство?
00:12:22,189 --> 00:12:23,834 Пусть оно не кончается.
00:12:34,246 --> 00:12:37,031 КЛУБ КРУТЫХ ДЕТЕЙ ТОЛЬКО ДЛЯ МАЛЬЧИКОВ
00:12:37,254 --> 00:12:38,878 — Где ты был? — Э… о…
00:12:38,879 --> 00:12:40,263 делал мороженое с фруктами.
00:12:40,264 --> 00:12:41,216 — Сам себе? — Ага.
00:12:41,217 --> 00:12:43,551 Терри, ты лжёшь. Ты банан почистить не можешь.
00:12:43,552 --> 00:12:45,180 — Их всегда я чищу. — Стой.
00:12:45,181 --> 00:12:46,637 Почему ты сутулишься
00:12:46,638 --> 00:12:48,431 и выглядишь неуверенным в себе?
00:12:48,432 --> 00:12:51,350 Я оценивал себя. В зеркале. Я безобразный.
00:12:51,351 --> 00:12:52,519 Самоанализ — не твоё.
00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:54,520 Я говорил с Патрисией.
00:12:54,521 --> 00:12:55,899 — Она вызвала во мне новое чувство. — И во мне.
00:12:55,900 --> 00:12:56,940 — Безволие. — Заботу.
00:12:56,941 --> 00:12:58,441 Мне нравится, как она уничтожает меня
00:12:58,442 --> 00:13:01,571 колкими замечаниями. Никогда не чувствовал такого.
00:13:01,572 --> 00:13:04,363 Она вытирает мне рот и обращается как с младенцем.
00:13:04,364 --> 00:13:07,162 С такой заботой! У меня не было мамы, Корво.
00:13:07,163 --> 00:13:09,368 — Меня не купали. — Терри, мы создали ее,
00:13:09,369 --> 00:13:12,078 чтобы она ненавидела берлогу, но послушай:
00:13:12,079 --> 00:13:14,123 что, если изменить правила
00:13:14,124 --> 00:13:17,334 и пригласить Патрисию развлечься с нами в берлоге?
00:13:17,335 --> 00:13:18,878 — Будет здорово, Терри. — О да! Прекрасно.
00:13:18,879 --> 00:13:20,379 Изменим правила!
00:13:20,380 --> 00:13:21,967 Изменим правила. О-о!
00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:24,049 Но… я ненавижу это место.
00:13:24,050 --> 00:13:27,139 Я знаю, знаю. Но ничего. Смотри. А?
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:29,013 Видишь. Здесь не страшно. Весело?
00:13:29,014 --> 00:13:31,716 Нет. Не весело. Уходи, пока можешь! Беги!
00:13:31,717 --> 00:13:34,310 Не слушай рыбу. Она шутит. Это несерьезно.
00:13:34,311 --> 00:13:36,476 Она слегка ударилась.
00:13:37,272 --> 00:13:40,163 Патрисия, прошу, сгладь свою неприязнь к берлоге.
00:13:40,164 --> 00:13:42,817 Сгладить, сгла-дить.
00:13:42,818 --> 00:13:44,945 Забавно, ты никогда не гладишь меня!
00:13:44,946 --> 00:13:46,129 Хо-хо!
00:13:46,130 --> 00:13:49,849 Не могу полюбить берлогу.
00:13:56,843 --> 00:14:00,467 Надо уничтожить берлогу!
00:14:02,403 --> 00:14:03,981 Ты сделал ей ракетницу?!
00:14:03,982 --> 00:14:07,095 Робота без них построить сложнее, Терри.
00:14:12,846 --> 00:14:13,933 О-о!
00:14:13,934 --> 00:14:17,478 О-о-о. Шлинный дланг. Теперь я понял.
00:14:17,479 --> 00:14:20,054 — Да? И что это? — Не знаю.
00:14:22,794 --> 00:14:25,450 ДОЛЖНА НЕНАВИДЕТЬ БЕРЛОГУ
00:14:50,820 --> 00:14:54,834 О нет. Прошу, стой. Вторая дверь налево.
00:14:56,820 --> 00:14:58,485 О нет!
00:14:59,656 --> 00:15:03,282 Простите, извините. Идёт феминистка-герой.
00:15:03,283 --> 00:15:05,911 Разойдитесь. Я, женщина,
00:15:05,912 --> 00:15:08,372 пришла, чтобы разбить стеклянный потолок
00:15:08,373 --> 00:15:10,624 и уничтожить патриархат.
00:15:10,625 --> 00:15:13,085 Мы ищем Джесси, который создал этот клуб.
00:15:13,086 --> 00:15:16,587 У меня для вас новость. Джесси — не мальчик.
00:15:16,588 --> 00:15:18,924 Он девочка. И это я!
00:15:18,925 --> 00:15:20,591 Эй-эй-эй! Это твой клуб?
00:15:20,592 --> 00:15:23,469 Да. Прости, но это всё же не для мальчиков.
00:15:23,470 --> 00:15:27,683 Мы пришли не вступить в него, а выразить протест от имени всех женщин.
00:15:27,684 --> 00:15:29,481 — Но я сделала клуб, чтобы… — Ты знаешь,
00:15:29,482 --> 00:15:32,171 что притеснять людей из-за половой принадлежности плохо?
00:15:32,172 --> 00:15:34,897 Да. Я как раз собиралась это сказать.
00:15:34,898 --> 00:15:39,778 У меня две сестры. Больше всего меня бесит женоненавистничество. И это оно.
00:15:39,779 --> 00:15:41,113 — Нет. — Нет, оно!
00:15:41,114 --> 00:15:42,777 Ты должна прикрыть клуб!
00:15:42,778 --> 00:15:45,353 Нет, сначала я уничтожу его! Это задание!
00:15:45,354 --> 00:15:48,017 Если не она, мы прикроем его сами!
00:15:48,018 --> 00:15:49,241 — Прекратите! — Держите её,
00:15:49,242 --> 00:15:51,920 пока она не создала опасные условия для женщин!
00:15:51,921 --> 00:15:53,499 — Нет-нет-нет! — Она убегает!
00:15:53,500 --> 00:15:56,424 — Значит, виновата! — Народ, вперёд!
00:16:00,295 --> 00:16:01,863 Почему я?
00:16:01,864 --> 00:16:04,241 Она уничтожает то, что мне нравилось в мужчинах.
00:16:04,242 --> 00:16:05,950 — Остановим её. — Так.
00:16:05,951 --> 00:16:08,077 Давай схватим её и заставим уложить нас спать.
00:16:08,078 --> 00:16:10,578 Ты не схватишь ее. Она разрежет нас лазером.
00:16:10,579 --> 00:16:12,165 А чья это вина?
00:16:12,166 --> 00:16:13,749 — А? — Что делать?
00:16:13,750 --> 00:16:16,336 Стой. Раз она ненавидит берлоги, надо заманить ее
00:16:16,337 --> 00:16:18,676 в самую большую и дурацкую берлогу.
00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:21,037 Я знаю такую.
00:16:34,310 --> 00:16:36,094 АКТИВИРОВАН РЕЖИМ УБИЙСТВА
00:16:38,385 --> 00:16:40,549 Так. Вот она.
00:16:40,770 --> 00:16:42,030 Внутрь!
00:17:15,813 --> 00:17:17,896 Кольцо деактивации. Надо снять его.
00:17:17,897 --> 00:17:18,988 Целься в кольцо.
00:17:18,989 --> 00:17:21,109 — Сколько билетов в руки? — Не знаю.
00:17:21,110 --> 00:17:22,501 Миллион?
00:17:22,502 --> 00:17:25,076 Эй, они же платят мне этими билетами!
00:17:27,360 --> 00:17:28,725 Давай!
00:17:43,609 --> 00:17:46,843 — Мисс Перес! Мисс Перес! — Джесси, что ты здесь делаешь?
00:17:46,844 --> 00:17:48,510 Неважно! Школьное задание!
00:17:48,511 --> 00:17:50,096 Пригнись!
00:17:50,097 --> 00:17:53,057 Мисс Перес, я пыталась сделать стеклянный потолок,
00:17:53,058 --> 00:17:56,137 но мужчины совсем сошли с ума. Вы должны помочь мне.
00:17:56,139 --> 00:17:57,465 О чем ты говоришь?
00:17:57,466 --> 00:17:59,397 Я не смогла защитить права женщин,
00:17:59,398 --> 00:18:00,277 не ставьте мне два.
00:18:00,278 --> 00:18:01,877 Я даже не знала, что ты девочка.
00:18:01,878 --> 00:18:04,115 Думала, ты рисуешь световой меч.
00:18:04,116 --> 00:18:05,559 Что? Но у меня бант.
00:18:05,560 --> 00:18:07,263 Не знаю. Ты зелёная, и твой рот
00:18:07,264 --> 00:18:09,730 выходит за границы лица. Откуда мне знать?
00:18:09,731 --> 00:18:12,111 Хочешь сломать патриархат и получить пять —
00:18:12,112 --> 00:18:14,193 — вот твой шанс. — Вы правы, мисс Перес.
00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:17,750 Каждая феминистка должна победить своего робота.
00:18:25,414 --> 00:18:31,058 Пора вам, двум непослушным, капризным мальчикам, преподать урок.
00:18:32,546 --> 00:18:34,547 Патрисия, стой!
00:18:34,548 --> 00:18:36,465 Пол не найден.
00:18:36,466 --> 00:18:38,884 Я инопланетное растение.
00:18:38,885 --> 00:18:41,514 Я долго не понимала, что это нормально.
00:18:41,515 --> 00:18:44,320 Я могу делать, что хочу. И ты тоже.
00:18:44,871 --> 00:18:47,959 Но я мать, я жена. Я мать, я…
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:50,542 Вовсе нет. Ты робот-убийца.
00:18:50,543 --> 00:18:53,381 И если от этого ты счастлива, то будь им.
00:18:53,382 --> 00:18:57,008 Я не должна убивать мужчин. Я могу убить, кого захочу.
00:18:57,009 --> 00:18:59,801 Пол неважен. Я могу убить всех.
00:18:59,802 --> 00:19:01,403 Не сегодня!
00:19:01,704 --> 00:19:07,952 Нет! Я собиралась убить всех людей в мире.
00:19:08,326 --> 00:19:10,397 Патрисия, прости. Но тебя надо отключить.
00:19:10,398 --> 00:19:14,608 Я отключаюсь каждый день, когда ты снимаешь свою рубашку.
00:19:14,609 --> 00:19:16,484 В чем дело, Корво? Продолжай.
00:19:16,486 --> 00:19:19,488 Я не могу, Терри. Я не знал, что у меня дыра в сердце.
00:19:19,489 --> 00:19:23,786 И ее нужно заполнять оскорблениями и сексуальной критикой.
00:19:23,787 --> 00:19:25,994 Нельзя убить ее, но нельзя и жить с ней.
00:19:25,995 --> 00:19:28,160 Что же делать?
00:19:28,267 --> 00:19:30,332 Сначала мы решили, что нам нужна берлога,
00:19:30,333 --> 00:19:32,252 чтобы заполнить дыру внутри нас.
00:19:32,253 --> 00:19:34,048 Но мы должны были знать,
00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:36,546 что у нас есть много разных дыр,
00:19:36,547 --> 00:19:38,548 каждую из которых надо заполнить.
00:19:38,549 --> 00:19:40,930 Ты научила нас не прятаться, мама.
00:19:40,931 --> 00:19:42,177 — Спасибо. — Мы не можем убить тебя,
00:19:42,178 --> 00:19:44,262 но и нельзя, чтобы ты всё сожгла.
00:19:44,263 --> 00:19:46,520 Отныне ты будешь жить в контейнере.
00:19:46,521 --> 00:19:48,225 Обязательно избавляться от нее?
00:19:48,226 --> 00:19:51,305 Может, оставим её, как икону феминизма?
00:19:51,306 --> 00:19:53,790 Слишком короткое платье. Тебя сочтут распутной.
00:19:53,791 --> 00:19:55,315 Ты мне не мать! Заткнись!
00:19:55,316 --> 00:19:57,359 Патрисия, пора в контейнер.
00:19:57,360 --> 00:20:00,408 Не волнуйся, ты не будешь скучать. Я сделал тебе компанию.
00:20:00,409 --> 00:20:03,532 Кто сходит со мной в магазин, чтобы сделать возврат?
00:20:03,533 --> 00:20:05,539 Я не пытался изобразить Теда Круза.
00:20:05,540 --> 00:20:07,035 Это само получилось.
00:20:07,036 --> 00:20:08,899 — Привет. — Ты носишь такое?
00:20:08,900 --> 00:20:11,748 Я думала, я это выбросила. Почему ты корчишь рожу?
00:20:11,749 --> 00:20:14,292 — Я ничего не корчу. — Ты зануда.
00:20:14,293 --> 00:20:16,547 Нельзя быть такой тяпкой. Настоящий мужчина не дал бы
00:20:16,548 --> 00:20:18,839 закопать себя в контейнере.
00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:20,662 Приятно, что когда мы заскучаем по ней,
00:20:20,663 --> 00:20:23,802 мы можем выйти во двор и знать, что в паре метров от нас
00:20:23,803 --> 00:20:25,106 она пилит его из-за того,
00:20:25,107 --> 00:20:28,431 как он чистит зубы и как гнёт спину,
00:20:28,432 --> 00:20:30,692 как стоит, сгорбившись, и из-за того, что он щуплый,
00:20:30,693 --> 00:20:33,436 тощий и ненакачанный.
00:20:33,437 --> 00:20:36,147 — Да. — О. Сумасшедшая была неделька.
00:20:36,149 --> 00:20:38,851 А, да. Тебя не было. Где ты был всё время?
00:20:38,852 --> 00:20:40,990 Я случайно выпустил сотни коал из зоопарка,
00:20:40,991 --> 00:20:43,530 а затем отлавливал их всех.
00:20:43,531 --> 00:20:46,538 В зоопарке могут поместиться сотни коал?
00:20:46,539 --> 00:20:50,662 Да. Они бегали по всему городу. Пришлось убедить их с помощью диджериду.
00:20:50,663 --> 00:20:54,401 В новостях показывали. Неужели вы не видели?
00:20:55,136 --> 00:20:57,179 Так. Сюда. Сюда.
00:20:57,180 --> 00:20:59,203 Как ваши гендерные проблемы?
00:20:59,204 --> 00:21:01,521 Хорошо. Думаю, мы закрыли все дыры
00:21:01,522 --> 00:21:02,768 и решили все проблемы.
00:21:02,769 --> 00:21:06,178 Да. Думаю, все будут рады тому, что мы сделали.
00:21:06,179 --> 00:21:08,180 Я рад, что мы выжили. Не думаю,
00:21:08,181 --> 00:21:10,682 что у нас будет более спорная тема, чем эта.
00:21:10,683 --> 00:21:12,730 Итак, класс. Новое задание.
00:21:12,731 --> 00:21:16,439 Каждый должен найти расиста и проучить его на его же ошибках.
00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:17,772 Да!

00:00:29,088 --> 00:00:31,298 Боже мой, Божечки, о мой Бог, у нас нет носов!
00:00:33,048 --> 00:00:36,978 Планета Шлорп являлась идеальной утопией до падения астероида.
00:00:38,388 --> 00:00:40,598 Сотня взрослых и репликантов улетели с планеты вместе с Пупой
00:00:40,598 --> 00:00:42,688 и отправились в космос
00:00:42,688 --> 00:00:44,938 в поисках нового дома на необитаемой планете.
00:00:45,728 --> 00:00:48,738 Мы упали на Землю и застряли на этой уже и так перенаселенной планете.
00:00:48,738 --> 00:00:50,358 Верно, это я говорил все это время.
00:00:50,358 --> 00:00:52,158 Я тот, который держит Пупу. Меня зовут Корво.
00:00:52,158 --> 00:00:53,948 Это... это мое шоу. Я только что уронил Пупу.
00:00:53,948 --> 00:00:55,988 Видите меня? Это просто смешно.
00:00:55,988 --> 00:00:57,908 Я ненавижу Землю. Это ужасный дом.
00:00:57,908 --> 00:01:00,578 Люди тупые. Зачем они придумали столько языков?
00:01:00,578 --> 00:01:02,708 Почему они не собрались и не придумали один общий,
00:01:02,708 --> 00:01:05,088 чтобы в мексиканском ресторане я мог заказать сырные трубочки,
00:01:05,088 --> 00:01:06,798 и никто при этом не закатывал бы глаза.
00:01:16,678 --> 00:01:18,728 Это Кевин. О, у него там что-то крутое.
00:01:18,728 --> 00:01:20,888 Я тоже хочу. Я хочу все, что есть у него.
00:01:20,888 --> 00:01:22,898 Что это? Выглядит потрясно.
00:01:22,898 --> 00:01:23,898 Подойдем к нему.
00:01:23,898 --> 00:01:26,858 Не думал, что эта фтука настолько тяволая.
00:01:26,858 --> 00:01:29,898 О, Корво. Терри, который похож на Гэри.
00:01:29,898 --> 00:01:31,318 - Если бы. - Тебе помочь
00:01:31,318 --> 00:01:32,988 с "сольшими старыми биськами"?
00:01:32,988 --> 00:01:34,568 Что это вообще? Что-то из католичества?
00:01:34,568 --> 00:01:36,618 Нет.
00:01:36,618 --> 00:01:38,908 Сольшие старые биськи? Уловили?
00:01:38,908 --> 00:01:41,408 Подумайте еще раз. Сольшие. Старые. Биськи.
00:01:41,408 --> 00:01:43,078 - А, точно. - Ну да, все понятно.
00:01:43,078 --> 00:01:44,538 Здесь сообщается, что биськи постарели.
00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:45,998 Мои любимые сольшие биськи.
00:01:45,998 --> 00:01:47,498 Это вывеска для моей мужицкой берлоги.
00:01:47,498 --> 00:01:50,088 Ого, что такое "мужиц каяберлога"?
00:01:50,088 --> 00:01:53,888 Ну, собственно, вот. Сюда я могу прийти и отдохнуть от всего.
00:01:53,888 --> 00:01:56,298 Местечко, где я могу остаться наедине с собой.
00:01:56,298 --> 00:01:58,058 Зацените игровой автомат из "Святых из Бундока"
00:01:58,058 --> 00:02:00,428 И классический окунь.
00:02:00,428 --> 00:02:02,598 Выпусти меня в озеро.
00:02:02,598 --> 00:02:04,648 Что? Он это мне говорит?
00:02:04,648 --> 00:02:05,858 В этой рыбе полно сюрпризов.
00:02:05,858 --> 00:02:08,438 О, правило. №1: мужчина всегда прав.
00:02:08,438 --> 00:02:10,398 №2: спорт - это жизнь.
00:02:10,398 --> 00:02:11,398 Все это для меня ново.
00:02:11,398 --> 00:02:13,028 Не хочу случайно нарушить что-нибудь.
00:02:13,028 --> 00:02:16,238 А сейчас лучшая часть. Вы готовы к отвалу башки?
00:02:16,238 --> 00:02:17,408 Боже мой.
00:02:18,158 --> 00:02:19,578 Черт, это...
00:02:19,578 --> 00:02:20,998 Ого.
00:02:20,998 --> 00:02:23,038 - Наконец-то. - Кевин, ты идешь...
00:02:23,038 --> 00:02:26,708 Боже мой, неужели ты реально потратил $3,000 на эту сексистскую вывеску?
00:02:26,708 --> 00:02:28,128 Ты адекватный? - Детка, то, что я делаю
00:02:28,128 --> 00:02:30,088 со своей премией, это мое дело.
00:02:31,258 --> 00:02:32,878 Корво, давай говорить откровенно.
00:02:32,878 --> 00:02:34,968 Пожалуйста, давай сделаем себе мужиц каяберлогу?
00:02:34,968 --> 00:02:36,508 - Давай. - Что, правда?
00:02:36,508 --> 00:02:38,678 Не долго ты сопротивлялся. - Я уж было хотел тебе отсоса...
00:02:38,678 --> 00:02:41,218 Кевин такой уверенный и счастливый. Он, похоже, многое успел сделать.
00:02:41,218 --> 00:02:43,888 Вообрази, какой замечательной была бы жизнь, будь мы уверенными.
00:02:44,938 --> 00:02:46,478 Вы замечали, что мяч похож на пивной боч...
00:02:46,478 --> 00:02:47,898 Заткнись, Кевин, мы воображаем.
00:02:48,768 --> 00:02:51,438 Коретта Скотт Кинг и Джилл Солоуэй -
00:02:51,438 --> 00:02:53,028 одни из многих выдающихся феминисток,
00:02:53,028 --> 00:02:55,158 которые сделали жизнь женщин лучше.
00:02:55,158 --> 00:02:57,448 Дамы, в этом семестре ваша итоговая оценка
00:02:57,448 --> 00:02:59,698 зависит от доказательств, что вы боролись с патриархатом.
00:02:59,698 --> 00:03:02,908 К пятнице подготовьте реферат о том, как вы пробили "стеклянный потолок".
00:03:02,908 --> 00:03:04,748 Что это вообще значит?
00:03:04,748 --> 00:03:06,748 Эм, мисс Перец, а что делать мальчикам?
00:03:06,748 --> 00:03:09,498 Мне плевать, можете нарисовать световой меч или что угодно.
00:03:09,498 --> 00:03:11,918 Поймите, что вам жить куда проще.
00:03:11,918 --> 00:03:14,088 Не забудьте оставить оценку и чаевые в учительском приложении.
00:03:14,088 --> 00:03:17,088 Серьезно, ребят, мне нужно купить лекарство от астмы.
00:03:17,088 --> 00:03:18,468 Я живу рядом с шахтой.
00:03:18,468 --> 00:03:21,718 Блин, и что мне делать? Когда я выбирала стать девочкой,
00:03:21,718 --> 00:03:24,348 я думала, мне достанутся лучшие игрушки из McDonald's.
00:03:24,348 --> 00:03:26,018 А теперь мне нужно с чем-то бороться?
00:03:26,018 --> 00:03:28,148 А я говорил тебе не становиться девочкой. Помнишь?
00:03:28,148 --> 00:03:31,018 Я пытался объяснить тебе все, как только стал мальчиком
00:03:31,018 --> 00:03:32,228 и научился лучше объяснять.
00:03:32,228 --> 00:03:36,398 Мне просто нужно найти какой-нибудь стеклянный потолок и разнести его к чертям собачьим.
00:03:36,398 --> 00:03:40,408 Иначе Джилл Солоуэй сняла сериал "Я люблю Дика" напрасно.
00:03:40,408 --> 00:03:42,658 Хочешь мне помочь? Будем бороться вместе.
00:03:42,658 --> 00:03:44,578 Нет, я пас. Останусь здесь и
00:03:44,578 --> 00:03:46,078 займусь обычными инопланетными делами.
00:03:46,078 --> 00:03:48,248 Ну же, гендерная политика - это весело.
00:03:48,248 --> 00:03:49,958 Звучит как что-то на слишком сложном.
00:03:49,958 --> 00:03:52,798 В интернете столько спорят о том, кому быть президентом
00:03:52,798 --> 00:03:54,458 охотиться за привидениями. Ну, удачи.
00:03:54,458 --> 00:03:56,088 Нет тут ничего сложного!
00:03:56,088 --> 00:03:58,548 Вопросы пола - это нормальная тема для обсуждения.
00:03:58,548 --> 00:04:03,558 Да ладно тебе, Юмьюлак, не веди себя так. Не будь таким мужиком.
00:04:03,558 --> 00:04:06,178 Эй, ребят, не против, если я возьму бумеранг?
00:04:06,178 --> 00:04:07,728 Что тут происходит?
00:04:07,728 --> 00:04:09,648 Добро пожаловать в нашу "мужиц каяберлогу".
00:04:09,648 --> 00:04:11,358 Мужицкая берлога!
00:04:11,358 --> 00:04:13,108 Но-но, у нас тут правила.
00:04:13,108 --> 00:04:15,988 Прочти их и неукоснительно соблюдай, прежде чем начать веселиться.
00:04:15,988 --> 00:04:18,068 Только для мужчин? Так, подождите.
00:04:18,068 --> 00:04:19,408 У вас, ребят, тоже эта гендерная фигня?
00:04:19,408 --> 00:04:21,658 - Что? Нет. У нас "мужиц каяберложная" фигня.
00:04:21,658 --> 00:04:23,788 - Что такое "чольшие старые блены"? - Понятия не имею.
00:04:23,788 --> 00:04:26,828 Что-то на человеческом. У них закончились "сольшие старые биськи",
00:04:26,828 --> 00:04:29,248 но продавец сказал, что этой из той же темы, так что...
00:04:30,418 --> 00:04:32,088 Прикольно, да? Прям как у Кевина.
00:04:32,088 --> 00:04:33,918 Мне нравится, как она делает туда-сюда.
00:04:33,918 --> 00:04:35,048 Держит в интриге.
00:04:35,338 --> 00:04:37,468 Футбол - это круто.
00:04:37,468 --> 00:04:39,548 Можем посмотреть, как Джетс играют с коричневыми.
00:04:39,548 --> 00:04:43,098 Это дом коричневых. Под этой крышей собраны только фанаты коричневых.
00:04:43,098 --> 00:04:44,308 Понял? - Это коричневый город, детка.
00:04:44,308 --> 00:04:47,228 Теперь сядьте все на диван, возьмите ледяного,
00:04:47,228 --> 00:04:50,228 и позвольте крутости "мужиц каяберлоги" вылиться наружу.
00:04:53,938 --> 00:04:55,358 Вот-вот выльется.
00:04:55,858 --> 00:04:57,938 Помоги мне.
00:05:01,318 --> 00:05:05,118 Приветик, я девушка и я ищу, какой патриархат бы разрушить.
00:05:05,118 --> 00:05:08,748 Я никогда не играла раньше в эту игру, но можно быть вашим нападающим?
00:05:08,748 --> 00:05:10,788 Ха-ха, конечно нет.
00:05:10,788 --> 00:05:13,838 Ха! Вы боитесь, что я кардинально изменю
00:05:13,838 --> 00:05:17,668 представление общественности о женщинах в преимущественном мужских видах спорта.
00:05:17,668 --> 00:05:19,338 Попались, сосунки!
00:05:19,338 --> 00:05:22,428 Что? Нет. Девочки уже давно играют в футбольной команде.
00:05:22,428 --> 00:05:24,718 Ты не можешь быть нападающей потому, что мы уже
00:05:24,718 --> 00:05:27,348 через Верховный суд штата сделали нападающей собаку.
00:05:28,018 --> 00:05:31,808 Отлично, Денвер! Хороший мальчик.
00:05:31,808 --> 00:05:33,608 Можем сделать тебя квотербеком.
00:05:33,608 --> 00:05:36,978 Эй, Дилан! Эта девочка, которую я еще не видел в игре, будет вместо тебя.
00:05:36,978 --> 00:05:39,528 Я не против. Победа - это не главное.
00:05:39,528 --> 00:05:43,408 Похоже, найти сложности для женщин будет очень сложно.
00:05:43,408 --> 00:05:46,658 Ну что, тебя уже захлестнуло волной крутости "мужиц каяберлоги"?
00:05:46,658 --> 00:05:47,908 Это вряд ли.
00:05:47,908 --> 00:05:49,578 Может, захлестнуло, а мы не заметили?
00:05:49,578 --> 00:05:51,538 Нет, здесь что-то не так. Чего-то не хватает.
00:05:51,538 --> 00:05:53,998 У Кевина в "каяберлоге" есть что-то, чего нет у нас.
00:05:53,998 --> 00:05:56,998 Вроде бы все есть. Ну, типа кучи постеров из фильмов про мужиков
00:05:56,998 --> 00:05:59,798 на мужицкие темы типа "Парни не плачут", "Парням побоку",
00:05:59,798 --> 00:06:01,968 "Как отделаться от парня за 10 дней".
00:06:01,968 --> 00:06:05,008 Терри, включи живую голограмму "мужиц каяберлоги" Кевина.
00:06:07,008 --> 00:06:09,268 Ничего не понимаю. Все абсолютно так же.
00:06:09,268 --> 00:06:11,178 Компьютер, проанализируй уровень азота и...
00:06:11,178 --> 00:06:13,688 Может, выйдешь и посмотришь, как твой сын задует свечи?
00:06:13,688 --> 00:06:15,688 Все ждут только тебя. - Три года ему будет
00:06:15,688 --> 00:06:16,858 еще целый год.
00:06:16,858 --> 00:06:18,358 - Кевин. - С чем торт?
00:06:18,358 --> 00:06:19,938 - Кевин! - Ладно!
00:06:19,938 --> 00:06:22,568 Господи, ненавижу эту мужскую берлогу.
00:06:22,568 --> 00:06:24,278 Компьютер, сотри все, кроме Анжелы.
00:06:24,278 --> 00:06:27,118 Он проводит все время в этой дурацкой комнате с игрушками,
00:06:27,118 --> 00:06:28,488 вместо общения с семьей.
00:06:28,488 --> 00:06:30,288 Надо было выходить замуж за Омри.
00:06:30,288 --> 00:06:32,958 Терри, мы упустили главную суть "мужиц каяберлоги".
00:06:32,958 --> 00:06:34,748 Нам нужно устраивать больше вечеринок?
00:06:34,748 --> 00:06:36,628 Терри, весь смысл "мужиц каяберлоги" в том,
00:06:36,628 --> 00:06:39,628 что кого-то раздражает, когда ты в "мужиц каяберлоге".
00:06:39,628 --> 00:06:41,588 - Но я не хочу быть здесь по-очереди. - Я тоже.
00:06:41,588 --> 00:06:43,178 А это значит, что нам нужно
00:06:43,178 --> 00:06:45,638 создать робота, которого бесит, что мы в "мужиц каяберлоге".
00:06:47,178 --> 00:06:48,638 - Точно! - Терри!
00:06:48,928 --> 00:06:51,268 - Говоря "мы", ты же имел в виду только себя? - Да, вся работа на мне.
00:06:51,268 --> 00:06:52,558 Просто хотел быть вежливым.
00:06:52,558 --> 00:06:54,598 Узри нашего нового робота.
00:06:54,598 --> 00:06:56,348 - Быстро ты. - Он из деталей
00:06:56,348 --> 00:06:57,438 от прошлого робота.
00:06:57,438 --> 00:06:59,898 Того, который должен был убить детей, обливших тебя мочой?
00:06:59,898 --> 00:07:01,188 - Отпустил ситуацию? - Пока что
00:07:01,188 --> 00:07:02,318 пускай живут.
00:07:02,318 --> 00:07:03,568 Знаешь, что я тебе скажу?
00:07:03,568 --> 00:07:06,198 А ты использовал те спецификации, что я дал,
00:07:06,198 --> 00:07:08,408 чтобы сделаеть ее лучшей сериальной маможеной?
00:07:08,408 --> 00:07:10,328 Да, она на 20% недовольная жена Рэймонда,
00:07:10,328 --> 00:07:12,498 на 20% любящая горячая мамочка из "Американской семейки",
00:07:12,498 --> 00:07:14,658 на 15% быстроговорящая мама из "Девочек Гилмор"
00:07:14,658 --> 00:07:17,208 и на 10% Мардж Симпсон за голубые волосы.
00:07:17,208 --> 00:07:19,288 - Как-то много процентов. - Вообще-то даже наоборот.
00:07:19,288 --> 00:07:22,798 Остальное - просто код-наполнитель, за исключением щепотки Софии из "Золотых девочек".
00:07:22,798 --> 00:07:25,298 Она та еще нахалка, я не смог устоять.
00:07:25,298 --> 00:07:26,838 25, 83...
00:07:26,838 --> 00:07:29,428 Ты считаешь на абака-дактелях, как ребенок?
00:07:29,428 --> 00:07:32,138 Тебе что, 80 лет? - Вот блин, я сбился.
00:07:32,138 --> 00:07:34,888 Я назвал ее П-А-Т-Р-И-С-И-А.
00:07:34,888 --> 00:07:37,808 Если расшифровать, то Полностью Автоматический Телевизионный
00:07:37,808 --> 00:07:39,648 Разработанный Искусственно Спутник и Андроид.
00:07:39,648 --> 00:07:41,318 Тебе не обязательно было подбирать слова.
00:07:41,318 --> 00:07:43,898 Ты выбрал имя с двумя "И" и двумя "А". Это уже было сложно.
00:07:43,898 --> 00:07:45,858 Не важно, как расшифровывается ПАТРИСИА. Важно, что она
00:07:45,858 --> 00:07:48,198 запрограммирована ненавидеть "мужиц каяберлогу".
00:07:49,318 --> 00:07:51,738 Корво, Терри.
00:07:51,738 --> 00:07:54,198 Пупа! Надеюсь, вы не собирались провести весь день
00:07:54,198 --> 00:07:57,458 в этой ужасной, отвратительной "мужиц каяберлоге". У нас есть дела по дому.
00:07:57,458 --> 00:07:59,538 - Почему диджериду такие дорогие? - Что-что?
00:07:59,538 --> 00:08:03,128 $5000. Это всего лишь дудка. Все равно куплю.
00:08:03,128 --> 00:08:06,258 Вы что, сделали женщину-робота? - Прикольно, правда?
00:08:06,258 --> 00:08:07,968 Она нужна, чтобы ненавидеть "мужиц каяберлогу".
00:08:07,968 --> 00:08:09,928 Только посмотри, какая она крутая.
00:08:09,928 --> 00:08:11,218 Идеальная ненавистница. - Нет уж.
00:08:11,218 --> 00:08:12,928 Вы, ребят, ввязались в какую-то гендерную фигню.
00:08:12,928 --> 00:08:15,018 Говорю вам, это не закончится ничем хорошим.
00:08:15,018 --> 00:08:16,138 Я сваливаю. Хорошего дня.
00:08:16,138 --> 00:08:18,398 - Но это не гендерная фигня. - Я сказал, хорошего дня.
00:08:18,398 --> 00:08:21,438 Не важно, что произойдет, она будет винить только "мужиц каяберлогу".
00:08:21,438 --> 00:08:24,188 Прямо как настоящая жена. - Я, блять, ненавижу эту "мужиц каяберлогу".
00:08:24,188 --> 00:08:26,358 Теперь мне так хочется туда пойти!
00:08:26,608 --> 00:08:28,818 - О, да. - Сработало!
00:08:32,158 --> 00:08:35,828 Привет, парни. Я, девочка, хочу играть в вашей мужской команде по лакроссу.
00:08:35,828 --> 00:08:38,208 А я еще я ничего не знаю про лакросс.
00:08:38,208 --> 00:08:40,578 - Ха-ха, ты слышал это? - О, да, Чад, слышал.
00:08:40,578 --> 00:08:42,378 Но не могу поверить. Повтори-ка, девочка.
00:08:42,378 --> 00:08:45,128 Лакросс больше не больше не будет на французском "изнасилование".
00:08:45,128 --> 00:08:48,048 Я требую, чтобы меня взяли в вашу мужскую команду. Проблемы?
00:08:48,048 --> 00:08:50,888 Не терпите девчонок, ступающих на ваше "чисто мужское" поле?
00:08:50,888 --> 00:08:53,598 Нет, я годами просил, чтобы к нам в команду взяли девочку.
00:08:53,598 --> 00:08:55,808 Наконец-то футболисты перестанут смеяться над нами.
00:08:55,808 --> 00:08:57,978 Да ладно вам, это должно было стать борьбой.
00:08:57,978 --> 00:08:59,728 Ребят, у нас в команде девочка!
00:09:01,058 --> 00:09:03,688 Эй, остановитесь!
00:09:05,228 --> 00:09:09,068 Внимание, киберспортивная команда! Я знаю, что геймеры те еще сексисты,
00:09:09,068 --> 00:09:12,988 и именно поэтому у женских персонажей в играх такие нереалистичные пропорции,
00:09:12,988 --> 00:09:16,498 и запрограммированы так, чтобы геймеры постоянно на них смотрели.
00:09:16,498 --> 00:09:18,748 Возьмите меня в команду. - Ура, еще одна девочка!
00:09:18,748 --> 00:09:21,078 Подождите, я что, единственный парень? О, нет.
00:09:21,078 --> 00:09:23,588 А я тут так шифровался.
00:09:24,418 --> 00:09:27,378 Австралийская музыка супер. Это как отдельный жанр.
00:09:27,378 --> 00:09:31,048 Посмотрите-ка на первую в городе женщину-пожарного.
00:09:31,048 --> 00:09:33,718 Я нашла свой стеклянный потолок и разбила его к чертям.
00:09:33,718 --> 00:09:35,178 И спасла почти всю семью.
00:09:35,178 --> 00:09:37,928 А я первая женщина, которая пояснила мужчине, что такое джаз.
00:09:37,928 --> 00:09:40,188 Там все дело в синкопе.
00:09:40,188 --> 00:09:42,848 Круто, конечно, но я почти всю семью спасла.
00:09:42,848 --> 00:09:44,768 Почему "почти"?
00:09:44,768 --> 00:09:47,688 Потому что звучит лучше, чем "спасла только двух собак".
00:09:47,688 --> 00:09:49,358 Юмьюлак, иди сюда.
00:09:50,358 --> 00:09:52,608 Если я в ближайшее время не найду стеклянный потолок,
00:09:52,608 --> 00:09:55,328 их все разобьет кто-то другой, и тогда я получу двойку,
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:57,618 и они отправят меня в класс "Б", где одни тупицы.
00:09:57,618 --> 00:09:59,958 Но в "Б"-классе круто. Мы просто весь день рисуем.
00:09:59,958 --> 00:10:01,208 И хватит морочить мне голову.
00:10:01,208 --> 00:10:03,288 Я же сказал, что не хочу ввязываться в эту гендер-фигню.
00:10:03,288 --> 00:10:04,628 У меня больше нет идей.
00:10:04,628 --> 00:10:06,338 Знаешь, что спасает меня, когда нет идей?
00:10:06,338 --> 00:10:09,378 Кокаин. После него у меня сразу куча идей.
00:10:10,878 --> 00:10:13,798 Идея! Летающие штаны-собаки.
00:10:15,598 --> 00:10:18,098 Хм, мне нравится кокаин. Но разве это законно?
00:10:18,098 --> 00:10:20,728 Все крутое вне закона. К тому же, нам он не вредит,
00:10:20,728 --> 00:10:22,438 потому что он иначе влияет на наш организм.
00:10:22,438 --> 00:10:23,728 Для инопланетян он как сахар.
00:10:23,728 --> 00:10:27,148 Юмьюлак, идея! Мне нужно самой создать стеклянный потолок,
00:10:27,148 --> 00:10:29,028 а затем самой же разбить его. - Да ладно тебе.
00:10:29,028 --> 00:10:30,438 Я к этой мысли отношения не имею.
00:10:30,438 --> 00:10:32,318 Я просто ем кокаин, как и всегда.
00:10:32,318 --> 00:10:34,488 Не впутывай меня в это. - Спасибо, что помог, Юмьюлак.
00:10:34,488 --> 00:10:37,078 Перестань! Сейчас я буду бороться со своей тенью!
00:10:42,038 --> 00:10:45,498 ПАТРИСИА, уверен, тебя бесит, что мы весь день торчим в "мужиц каяберлоге",
00:10:45,498 --> 00:10:47,748 пока ты тут, а не зависаешь с нами в "мужиц каяберлоге".
00:10:48,588 --> 00:10:50,668 Что за гора грязной посуды, Корво?
00:10:50,668 --> 00:10:52,298 Я поставил их здесь, чтобы ты помыла.
00:10:52,298 --> 00:10:54,338 Видишь эту штуку? Называется посудомойка.
00:10:54,338 --> 00:10:57,548 А вот так она заводится.
00:10:57,548 --> 00:11:00,348 Теперь в доме есть хотя бы одна вещь, которую ты умеешь завести.
00:11:00,348 --> 00:11:03,268 Хотя чего это я, ты же инопланетянин без члена.
00:11:03,268 --> 00:11:05,848 Права была моя мама. А теперь мне что с этим делать?
00:11:05,848 --> 00:11:06,558 Члена же нет.
00:11:08,148 --> 00:11:10,068 Раньше со мной никто так не разговаривал.
00:11:10,068 --> 00:11:12,238 Возможно, функция злой жены - это побочный эффект
00:11:12,238 --> 00:11:14,198 твоей программы.
00:11:14,198 --> 00:11:16,948 Или, возможно, я просто устала быть женой идиота,
00:11:16,948 --> 00:11:19,368 который разбрасывает грязные носки в гостиной.
00:11:19,368 --> 00:11:21,698 Наверное, это побочный продукт добавления всех данных
00:11:21,698 --> 00:11:24,578 из мамских сериалов в твою личность. Ты идеальный организм.
00:11:24,578 --> 00:11:27,958 Продукт? Ты не зарабатываешь даже на продукты.
00:11:27,958 --> 00:11:31,338 Да и организм я испытываю только от просмотра "Чужестранки".
00:11:31,338 --> 00:11:33,588 Из-за тебя я чувствую себя ничтожным и менее мужественным.
00:11:33,588 --> 00:11:35,378 Мне нравится. Быстро, скажи еще что-нибудь.
00:11:35,378 --> 00:11:38,258 Быстро? Ты только так и можешь.
00:11:41,888 --> 00:11:45,138 Ауч, ПАТРИСИА, я поранил плечо.
00:11:46,898 --> 00:11:49,308 Оу, дорогой, сейчас я о тебе позабочусь.
00:11:49,308 --> 00:11:50,688 Один, два...
00:11:54,898 --> 00:11:57,278 - Тебе уже лучше? - Немного.
00:11:57,278 --> 00:11:59,948 Ты настоящий маленький храбрец.
00:11:59,948 --> 00:12:01,828 Я очень тобой горжусь. Вот так.
00:12:02,368 --> 00:12:06,618 Особый поцелуй от мамочки. Ну что, стало лучше?
00:12:06,618 --> 00:12:09,708 - А можно еще один? - Конечно, милый.
00:12:09,708 --> 00:12:12,048 Кажется, этот побочный эффект является
00:12:12,048 --> 00:12:13,458 результатом моей храбрости.
00:12:13,458 --> 00:12:17,428 Я пеку печеньки. Малыш хочет облизать ложку?
00:12:20,258 --> 00:12:22,138 Божечки, что это за чувство я испытываю?
00:12:22,138 --> 00:12:23,678 Хочу, чтобы это длилось вечно.
00:12:37,278 --> 00:12:38,908 Где ты был?
00:12:38,908 --> 00:12:40,068 Готовил мороженое с фруктами.
00:12:40,068 --> 00:12:41,238 - Сам? - Ага.
00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:43,578 Терри, ты врушка. Ты даже бананы чистить не умеешь.
00:12:43,578 --> 00:12:45,198 Тебе их всегда я чищу. - Погоди-ка.
00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:46,658 Почему ты сутулишься так,
00:12:46,658 --> 00:12:48,458 будто у тебя снизилась самооценка?
00:12:48,458 --> 00:12:51,378 Я осуждал себя перед заркалом. И мне очень стыдно.
00:12:51,378 --> 00:12:52,538 Но ты не умеешь в самокритику.
00:12:52,538 --> 00:12:54,548 Это ПАТРИСИА. Она заставила меня чувствовать себя так,
00:12:54,548 --> 00:12:55,918 как никогда раньше. - И меня.
00:12:55,918 --> 00:12:56,968 - Кастрированным. - Лелеянным.
00:12:56,968 --> 00:12:58,468 Она может пронзить меня насквозь
00:12:58,468 --> 00:13:01,598 одной маленькой колкостью. Меня еще никто так очаровательно не унижал.
00:13:01,598 --> 00:13:04,388 Она вытирала мне рот салфеточкой. И заботилась как о ребенке.
00:13:04,388 --> 00:13:07,178 Я окружен комфортом и заботой. У меня никогда не было мамы, Корво.
00:13:07,178 --> 00:13:09,388 Меня никто не купал. - Терри, я знаю, что мы создали ее
00:13:09,388 --> 00:13:12,108 только чтобы ненавидеть "мужиц каяберлогу", но послушай вот что.
00:13:12,108 --> 00:13:14,148 Что, если мы изменим правила "мужиц каяберлоги"
00:13:14,148 --> 00:13:17,358 и пригласим ПАТРИСИА зависнуть тут вместе с нами?
00:13:17,358 --> 00:13:18,898 Что думаешь? - Господи, конечно да.
00:13:18,898 --> 00:13:20,408 Это замечательно. Давай менять правила.
00:13:20,408 --> 00:13:21,988 Мы меняем правила! Ура!
00:13:21,988 --> 00:13:24,078 Но... но я же ненавижу это место.
00:13:24,078 --> 00:13:27,158 Да-да, знаю, но все в порядке. Видишь?
00:13:27,158 --> 00:13:29,038 Ты можешь здесь находиться. Круто, да?
00:13:29,038 --> 00:13:31,828 Нет, не круто. Беги отсюда, пока можешь.
00:13:31,828 --> 00:13:34,338 Не обращай внимания на эту рыбу, она шутит.
00:13:34,338 --> 00:13:35,708 Ее, походу, торкнуло.
00:13:37,298 --> 00:13:39,798 ПАТРИСИА, я отменяю твою ненависть к "мужиц каяберлоге".
00:13:39,798 --> 00:13:42,838 Отмена, от-ме-на заводских настроек...
00:13:42,838 --> 00:13:44,968 а вот меня ты не заводишь.
00:13:45,968 --> 00:13:48,848 Не-люблю-"мужиц-каяберлогу"-чольшие-старые-блены
00:13:56,608 --> 00:13:59,858 Уничтожить "мужиц каяберлогу"!
00:14:02,488 --> 00:14:03,988 Ты встроил реактивные гранатометы?
00:14:03,988 --> 00:14:05,528 Без них было нельзя Терри.
00:14:05,528 --> 00:14:06,328 Это несущие элементы.
00:14:13,958 --> 00:14:17,498 Чольшие старые блены... Теперь понятно.
00:14:17,498 --> 00:14:19,708 - Да? И что это значит? - Не знаю.
00:14:29,768 --> 00:14:33,188 ♪ У меня тигриные глаза, я воин,♪
00:14:33,348 --> 00:14:37,188 ♪ Танцующий среди языков пламени ♪
00:14:37,188 --> 00:14:39,818 ♪ Я — победитель ♪
00:14:39,818 --> 00:14:43,988 ♪ И ты ещё услышишь моё рычание ♪
00:14:44,238 --> 00:14:47,948 ♪ Оно будет громче, громче рычания льва, ♪
00:14:47,948 --> 00:14:50,748 ♪ Ведь я — победитель ♪
00:14:50,748 --> 00:14:53,958 О нет, пожалуйста, не делай этого. Вторая дверь слева.
00:14:56,588 --> 00:14:58,038 О, нет.
00:14:59,418 --> 00:15:03,048 Извините,простите. Идет героиня-феминистка.
00:15:03,048 --> 00:15:05,678 Расступитесь, мужчины. Я, женщина,
00:15:05,678 --> 00:15:08,138 пришла, чтобы разбить стеклянный потолок
00:15:08,138 --> 00:15:10,388 и разрушить чертов патриархат.
00:15:10,388 --> 00:15:12,848 Вообще-то ты ждем Джесси - того парня, что основал этот клуб.
00:15:12,848 --> 00:15:16,348 Тогда у меня для вас новости. Джесси не парень.
00:15:16,348 --> 00:15:18,688 Это девочка. И это я.
00:15:18,688 --> 00:15:20,358 Этот клуб твой?
00:15:20,358 --> 00:15:23,238 Да, и уж прости, но теперь этот клуб не только для парней.
00:15:23,238 --> 00:15:24,988 Мы и не хотели вступать. Мы выступаем против
00:15:24,988 --> 00:15:26,488 ради женщин, которым не хватает смелости
00:15:26,488 --> 00:15:27,448 выступить за себя.
00:15:27,448 --> 00:15:29,238 - Но я создала клуб, чтобы... - Ты же понимаешь,
00:15:29,238 --> 00:15:31,078 насколько неправильно дискриминировать людей
00:15:31,078 --> 00:15:32,658 по их половому признаку? - Да, но...
00:15:32,658 --> 00:15:34,658 Пока ты меня не перебил, я хотела сказать, что...
00:15:34,658 --> 00:15:37,168 Меня, как брата двух сестер, бесит
00:15:37,168 --> 00:15:39,538 женоненавистничество, а это оно и есть.
00:15:39,538 --> 00:15:40,878 - Вовсе нет. - А вот и да.
00:15:40,878 --> 00:15:42,338 Немедленно закрывай этот клуб.
00:15:42,338 --> 00:15:45,338 Нет, сначала я должна его побороть. Это для оценки.
00:15:45,338 --> 00:15:47,758 Если она не закроет клуб, мы сами тут все разнесем.
00:15:47,758 --> 00:15:48,928 - Хватит! - Хватайте ее,
00:15:48,928 --> 00:15:51,678 пока она не создала опасную среду для женщин.
00:15:51,678 --> 00:15:53,268 - Нет-нет-нет. - Она убегает.
00:15:53,268 --> 00:15:56,138 - Значит, она виновна. - Разъяренная толпа, давай за ней!
00:16:01,728 --> 00:16:04,108 Она разрушает то единственное, что мне нравится в людях.
00:16:04,108 --> 00:16:05,818 - Нужно ее остановить. - Мы просто схватим ее
00:16:05,818 --> 00:16:07,778 и заставим укладывать нас в постельки и читать книжки.
00:16:07,948 --> 00:16:09,778 Нельзя просто схватить ее, Терри. Она разрежет нас
00:16:09,778 --> 00:16:12,038 своими лазерами. - И кто, по-твоему, будет виноват?
00:16:12,038 --> 00:16:13,448 Я не знаю, что делать.
00:16:13,448 --> 00:16:16,208 Подожди-ка, раз она ненавидит "мужиц каяберлоги", нам нужно заманить ее
00:16:16,208 --> 00:16:18,538 в самую большую и дурацкую из всех "мужиц каяберлог".
00:16:18,538 --> 00:16:20,538 Как раз знаю такое местечко.
00:16:38,308 --> 00:16:39,598 Черт, вот и она.
00:16:40,688 --> 00:16:41,728 Давай внутрь.
00:17:15,678 --> 00:17:17,768 Кольцо активации. Надо снять его.
00:17:17,768 --> 00:17:19,188 Снимай кольцо. - Сколько билетиков
00:17:19,188 --> 00:17:20,978 за все липкие руки? - Без понятия.
00:17:20,978 --> 00:17:22,518 Примерно миллион. Эй!
00:17:22,518 --> 00:17:24,728 Их потом вычтут из моей зарплаты.
00:17:26,988 --> 00:17:27,858 Давай!
00:17:43,998 --> 00:17:46,708 - Мисс Перец! - Джесси, ты что здесь делаешь?
00:17:46,708 --> 00:17:48,378 Это по-поводу домашки. Вы не поймете!
00:17:48,378 --> 00:17:49,258 Пригнись!
00:17:49,968 --> 00:17:52,928 Мисс Перец, я пыталась разбить стеклянный потолок,
00:17:52,928 --> 00:17:55,678 но мальчики разозлились на меня. Помогите мне.
00:17:55,678 --> 00:17:57,178 Что за фигню ты несешь?
00:17:57,178 --> 00:17:59,268 Я не смогла побороться за права женщин, мисс Перец.
00:17:59,268 --> 00:18:00,138 Пожалуйста, не ставьте 2.
00:18:00,138 --> 00:18:01,558 Я даже не знала, что ты девочка.
00:18:01,558 --> 00:18:03,858 Я думала, ты нарисуешь световой меч.
00:18:03,858 --> 00:18:05,478 Что? Но ведь у меня бантик.
00:18:05,478 --> 00:18:07,148 Ну блин, ты зеленая, еще и рот
00:18:07,148 --> 00:18:09,648 выходит за переды лица. Откуда мне было знать?
00:18:09,648 --> 00:18:12,028 Если ты и правда хочешь разрушить патриархат и получить 5,
00:18:12,028 --> 00:18:14,118 это твой шанс. - Вы правы, мисс Перец.
00:18:14,118 --> 00:18:16,868 Каждая феминистка должна победить робота.
00:18:25,338 --> 00:18:28,958 Теперь вы, невоспитанные разочарования семьи.
00:18:28,958 --> 00:18:30,258 Пора преподать вам урок.
00:18:32,468 --> 00:18:33,888 ПАТРИСИА, хватит!
00:18:34,468 --> 00:18:36,388 Пол не определен.
00:18:36,388 --> 00:18:38,808 Это потому что я инопланетное растение.
00:18:38,808 --> 00:18:41,428 Я не сразу поняла, что это нормально.
00:18:41,428 --> 00:18:43,898 Я могу делать все, что пожелаю. И ты тоже.
00:18:44,898 --> 00:18:47,978 Но я мать, я жена, я мать, я...
00:18:47,978 --> 00:18:50,568 Вообще-то, нет. Ты робот-убийца.
00:18:50,568 --> 00:18:53,408 И если это делает тебя счастливой, смирись с этим.
00:18:53,408 --> 00:18:57,028 Я могу не убивать мужчин. Я могу убивать кого захочу.
00:18:57,028 --> 00:18:59,828 Независимо от их пола. Я убью всех!
00:18:59,828 --> 00:19:01,248 Не сегодня.
00:19:01,248 --> 00:19:07,088 Нет, я же собиралась убить всех людей в мире...
00:19:08,038 --> 00:19:10,418 Патрисиа, мне очень жаль. Но я вынужден тебя отключить.
00:19:10,418 --> 00:19:14,628 Я отключаюсь каждый раз, как ты снимаешь футболку.
00:19:14,628 --> 00:19:16,508 Что с тобой, Корво? Почему ты остановился?
00:19:16,508 --> 00:19:19,508 Я не могу деактивировать ее, Терри. Я даже не знал, что в моем сердце дыра.
00:19:19,508 --> 00:19:21,888 Дыра, которую могут заполнить только постоянные
00:19:21,888 --> 00:19:23,808 унижения и критика моей сексуальности.
00:19:23,808 --> 00:19:26,018 Мы не можем убить ее, но и жить с ней тоже не можем.
00:19:26,018 --> 00:19:27,308 И что же нам делать?
00:19:28,358 --> 00:19:30,358 Сначала мы думали, что нам нужна "мужиц каяберлога",
00:19:30,358 --> 00:19:32,278 чтобы заполнить дыру внутри нас.
00:19:32,278 --> 00:19:34,068 Но на самом деле, нам нужно было понять,
00:19:34,068 --> 00:19:36,568 что внутри нас всех разные дыры,
00:19:36,568 --> 00:19:38,578 которые мы и заполнить должны по-разному.
00:19:38,578 --> 00:19:40,948 Спасибо, мама, мы поняли, что не нужно прятаться в "мужиц каяберлоге".
00:19:40,948 --> 00:19:42,198 Мы не можем тебя убить,
00:19:42,198 --> 00:19:44,288 но и отпустить, чтоб ты все тут сожгла, тоже не можем.
00:19:44,288 --> 00:19:46,538 Так что теперь ты будешь жить в контейнере.
00:19:46,538 --> 00:19:48,248 Нам обязательно от нее избавляться?
00:19:48,248 --> 00:19:51,048 Может, пусть останется как икона феминизма?
00:19:51,048 --> 00:19:53,628 У тебя слишком короткое платье. Мальчики решат, что ты шлюха.
00:19:53,628 --> 00:19:55,338 Ты не моя мама! Заткнись!
00:19:55,338 --> 00:19:57,388 Патрисиа, тебе пора в контейнер.
00:19:57,388 --> 00:20:00,428 Не переживай, скучно не будет. Компанию тебе составит бот-недотепа.
00:20:00,428 --> 00:20:03,558 Кто-нибудь сходит со мной в магазин оформить возврат?
00:20:03,558 --> 00:20:05,558 Я не пытался сделать его похожим на Теда Круза.
00:20:05,558 --> 00:20:07,058 Оно само так вышло.
00:20:07,058 --> 00:20:08,648 - Привет. - Что на тебе надето?
00:20:08,648 --> 00:20:11,778 Я думала, что давно выбросила это. Не делай такое лицо.
00:20:11,778 --> 00:20:13,898 - Не делал я никакое лицо. - Боже, как же ты меня бесишь.
00:20:13,898 --> 00:20:16,568 Где твоя смелость? Настоящий мужик не позволил бы инопланетянину
00:20:16,568 --> 00:20:18,868 закопать себя в контейнере.
00:20:18,868 --> 00:20:20,658 В любой момент, когда мы по ней соскучимся,
00:20:20,658 --> 00:20:23,828 можно будет выйти сюда, вспомнить, что она здесь, в паре метрах под землей,
00:20:23,828 --> 00:20:25,078 и гнобит его.
00:20:25,078 --> 00:20:28,458 Что он плохо чистит зубы или, знаешь, не следит за осанкой.
00:20:28,458 --> 00:20:30,708 И что он постоянно сутулится, и что слишком худой
00:20:30,708 --> 00:20:33,458 и недостаточно мускулистый, ну и так далее.
00:20:33,458 --> 00:20:36,168 - Ага. - Бешеная неделька выдалась.
00:20:36,168 --> 00:20:38,678 А, да, тебя ж не было. И чем занимался все это время?
00:20:38,678 --> 00:20:41,008 Я случайно выпустил пару сотен коал из зоопарка,
00:20:41,008 --> 00:20:43,558 а потом провел кучу времени, пытаясь загнать их обратно.
00:20:43,558 --> 00:20:46,558 В зоопарке есть место для сотен коал?
00:20:46,558 --> 00:20:50,688 Ага, они бегали по всему городу. Я заманил их обратно с помощью диджериду.
00:20:50,688 --> 00:20:54,278 Это даже в новостях было. Вы что, все пропустили?
00:20:55,318 --> 00:20:57,358 Так, все обратно, давайте.
00:20:57,358 --> 00:20:59,158 Чем закончилась ваша история с гендерной фигней?
00:20:59,158 --> 00:21:01,698 Эм, хорошо. Мы вроде как изучили этот вопрос со всех сторон
00:21:01,698 --> 00:21:02,948 и все уладили.
00:21:02,948 --> 00:21:06,198 Да, мне кажется, все только обрадуются тому, что мы сделали.
00:21:06,198 --> 00:21:08,208 Ну, я рад, что мы вообще выжили, потому что это
00:21:08,208 --> 00:21:10,708 самая спорная тема из всех, с чем мы сталкивались.
00:21:10,708 --> 00:21:12,748 Ладненько, класс, следующим домашним заданием
00:21:12,748 --> 00:21:16,468 будет найти расиста и объяснить ему, в чем он ошибается.
00:21:16,468 --> 00:21:17,588 Ура!

00:00:28,903 --> 00:00:31,281 Oh, my god, oh, my god, oh, my god, we don't have noses!
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:35,285 <i>Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia</i>
00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:36,953 <i>until the asteroid hit.</i>
00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:40,540 <i>One hundred adults and their replicants were issued a pupa</i>
00:00:40,623 --> 00:00:42,417 <i>and escaped into, uh, the space,</i>
00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:45,462 <i>searching for new homes on uninhabited worlds.</i>
00:00:45,545 --> 00:00:48,256 <i>We crashed on Earth, stranding us on an already overpopulated planet.</i>
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:50,175 <i>That's right, I've been talking this whole time.</i>
00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:52,135 <i>I'm the one holding the pupa. My name's Korvo.</i>
00:00:52,218 --> 00:00:54,512 <i>This is, this is my show. I just dropped the pupa. Do you see me?</i>
00:00:54,596 --> 00:00:55,722 <i>This is ridiculous.</i>
00:00:55,805 --> 00:00:57,849 <i>I hate Earth. It's a horrible home.</i>
00:00:57,932 --> 00:01:00,477 <i>People are stupid. Why did they make so many languages?</i>
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:02,604 <i>Why didn't they just get together and figure out one language</i>
00:01:02,687 --> 00:01:04,981 <i>so when I go to a Mexican restaurant I can just order "cheese tube"</i>
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,775 <i>and not have someone roll their eyes at me.</i>
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:18,703 There's Kevin. Ooh, he's got somethin' cool.
00:01:18,828 --> 00:01:20,872 Oh, I want it. Oh, I want whatever Kevin has.
00:01:20,955 --> 00:01:23,875 What is that? It looks amazing. Come on, come on.
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:27,003 Oh, man, I didn't realize they would be as teavy as they are tig.
00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:29,881 Oh, Korvo, Terry who looks like a Gary.
00:01:29,964 --> 00:01:31,299 - I wish. - Can we help you
00:01:31,382 --> 00:01:32,967 with your "tig old bitties" sign?
00:01:33,051 --> 00:01:34,552 What is that? A Catholic thing?
00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,596 No.
00:01:36,679 --> 00:01:41,392 Tig old bitties. You get it? Think about it. Tig. Old. Bitties.
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:43,061 - Oh, yeah. - I-I definitely understand.
00:01:43,144 --> 00:01:44,687 It's announcing that the bitties are aged.
00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:47,482 - Oh, my favorite bitties are tig. - It's a joke sign for my man cave.
00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:50,068 Ooh, what's a "manc ave"?
00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:53,863 Well, here it is. This is where I can go and just get away from it all.
00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:56,282 A place I can express my most private self.
00:01:56,407 --> 00:01:58,201 Check out the Boondock Saints pinball machine.
00:01:58,284 --> 00:02:00,411 - Ooh. - And the classic bass.
00:02:00,537 --> 00:02:02,580 <i>♪ Put me in the lake ♪</i>
00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:05,834 What? He's talking to me? This fish is full of surprises.
00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:08,419 Ooh, posted rules. Number one, the man is always right.
00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:11,047 Number two, sports are life. These are all new to me.
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,007 I don't want to be in violation of any rules.
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:16,219 Here's the best part. Are you ready for me to blow your mind?
00:02:16,302 --> 00:02:17,470 Oh, my God.
00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:19,556 God damn it, this-
00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:20,932 - Oh, oh, my. - Ooh.
00:02:21,015 --> 00:02:23,017 - There it is. - Kevin, are you coming up--
00:02:23,101 --> 00:02:26,688 oh, god, did you actually spend $3,000 on that misogynistic sign?
00:02:26,771 --> 00:02:28,148 - What is wrong with you? - Babe, what I do
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:30,316 with my Christmas bonus is my Christmas business.
00:02:31,359 --> 00:02:32,777 Korvo, let's just be real here.
00:02:32,861 --> 00:02:34,946 Please, please, please, please can we have a man cave?
00:02:35,029 --> 00:02:36,406 - Yes. - What, oh, really?
00:02:36,489 --> 00:02:38,658 Oh, man, you should have held out. I was gonna offer to suck your--
00:02:38,741 --> 00:02:41,202 Kevin is so confident and happy. He must get so much work done.
00:02:41,286 --> 00:02:44,914 Imagine how great our lives would be if we could be this confident.
00:02:45,039 --> 00:02:46,541 Did you notice that the football is actually a keg--
00:02:46,624 --> 00:02:47,876 Shut up, Kevin, we're imagining.
00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:53,006 From Coretta Scott King to Jill Soloway, these are just a few notable feminists
00:02:53,089 --> 00:02:55,133 who improved the lives of women everywhere.
00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:57,427 Ladies, this semester, your final grade
00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:59,679 depends on proof that you fought the patriarchy.
00:02:59,762 --> 00:03:03,308 I want a full report on a glass ceiling you tried to shatter by next Friday.
00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:04,726 What does that even mean?
00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:06,728 Uh, Miss Perez, what, what do the boys have to do?
00:03:06,811 --> 00:03:09,480 I don't care, the boys can just draw a picture of a lightsaber or something.
00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:11,649 You might as well learn now that life is just easier for you.
00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:14,194 Don't forget to rate and tip me on the Teach app.
00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:17,071 Guys, guys, come on. I need it for my asthma medicine.
00:03:17,155 --> 00:03:18,448 I live near the quarry.
00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:21,618 Man, what am I gonna do? When I chose to be a girl,
00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:24,329 I thought it meant I'd get the better McDonald's toys.
00:03:24,412 --> 00:03:25,997 Now I have to topple something?
00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:28,124 I told you not to pick female. Remember?
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:30,877 I tried to explain that to you the minute I chose to be a man
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:32,212 and became better at explaining things.
00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:36,341 I just need to find a glass ceiling and shatter the crap out of it.
00:03:36,424 --> 00:03:40,386 Otherwise, Jill Soloway made I Love Dick for nothing.
00:03:40,470 --> 00:03:42,222 Ooh, you wanna help? We could topple it together.
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:44,474 Yeah, I'm gonna pass. I'm just gonna hang back
00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,059 and do a regular alien thing today.
00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:48,228 Come on, gender politics is fun.
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:50,063 Seems kind of like a loaded topic.
00:03:50,146 --> 00:03:52,815 Everyone on the internet is always fighting about who can be president
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:54,609 or who can bust ghosts, but good luck.
00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:58,529 It is not loaded! Gender issues are a totally normal thing to mess with.
00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:03,534 Come on, Yumyulack, don't be like that. Don't be such a man.
00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:06,120 Hey, do you guys mind if I borrow the boomerang?
00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:09,624 - Whoa, what's going on in here? - Welcome to our "manc ave."
00:04:09,707 --> 00:04:11,334 Man cave!
00:04:11,459 --> 00:04:13,086 Ah, ah, ah, there are rules.
00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:15,964 Please read and strictly abide by all of them before having fun.
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:18,049 Man only? Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.
00:04:18,132 --> 00:04:19,384 Are you guys doing a gender thing, too?
00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:21,636 What? No. We're doing a "manc ave" thing.
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:23,388 - What's "dig old bicks"? - I don't know.
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:26,808 Some sort of human code. They were out of "tig old bitties" signs
00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:29,227 but the salesman said it was in the same area, so...
00:04:30,436 --> 00:04:32,063 Pretty great, right? Just like Kevin's.
00:04:32,146 --> 00:04:33,898 No, yeah, I love how it moves up and down.
00:04:33,982 --> 00:04:35,316 Oh, it keeps you guessing.
00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:37,443 Ah, football is amazing.
00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,529 Apparently, we can watch jets battle the color brown.
00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:43,074 This is a color brown house. We are color brown fans under this roof.
00:04:43,199 --> 00:04:44,284 - Got it? - It's brown town, baby.
00:04:44,409 --> 00:04:47,203 Now everybody just sit back, grab a cold one,
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:50,373 and let the awesomeness of the "manc ave" wash over them.
00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:55,837 Any second now.
00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:58,756 Help me.
00:05:01,884 --> 00:05:05,096 Oh, hello, I'm a female and I'm looking for a patriarchy to topple.
00:05:05,179 --> 00:05:08,808 I've never played this game, but can I be your kicker, please?
00:05:08,891 --> 00:05:10,768 No way.
00:05:10,893 --> 00:05:13,813 A ha! You're freaking out that I would fundamentally alter
00:05:13,896 --> 00:05:17,650 the way society felt about women in a male-dominated sport.
00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,319 Gotcha, suckers!
00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:22,405 What? No. Girls have played on high school football teams for years.
00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:24,699 You just can't be the kicker because we already went
00:05:24,782 --> 00:05:27,994 to the state supreme court so a dog could be kicker.
00:05:28,119 --> 00:05:31,581 Damn, Denver! Good boy, good boy.
00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:33,583 You can be our starting quarterback. How about that?
00:05:33,708 --> 00:05:36,961 Hey, Dylan! This girl who I haven't seen play yet is taking your place.
00:05:37,045 --> 00:05:39,505 I'm fine with that. It's not about winning. Woo!
00:05:39,630 --> 00:05:43,384 Ugh, finding a new struggle for women is gonna be a real struggle.
00:05:43,509 --> 00:05:46,637 Hm, has the awesomeness of the "manc ave" washed over you yet?
00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:47,847 Um, I don't think so.
00:05:47,930 --> 00:05:49,557 Maybe it happened and we just didn't notice yet?
00:05:49,640 --> 00:05:51,517 No, this is wrong. Something's missing, Terry.
00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:53,811 There has to be something Kevin had in his "ave" that we don't have.
00:05:53,895 --> 00:05:57,023 No, no, I know. I mean, we have very man-centric movie posters
00:05:57,106 --> 00:05:59,776 with man themes like Boys Don't Cry, Boys On The Side,
00:05:59,901 --> 00:06:01,944 <i>How To Lose a Guy in Ten Days.</i>
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,989 Terry, pull up a live hologram feed of Kevin's "manc ave."
00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:09,243 See, I don't get it. It's exactly the same.
00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:11,162 Computer, analyze nitrogen levels and--
00:06:11,245 --> 00:06:13,664 Can you please come watch your son blow out his candles?
00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:16,834 - Everyone's waiting. - Oh, he'll be three for like a whole year.
00:06:16,918 --> 00:06:18,336 - Kevin. - What kind of cake?
00:06:18,419 --> 00:06:19,921 - Kevin! - All right!
00:06:20,004 --> 00:06:22,548 God, I hate this man cave.
00:06:22,673 --> 00:06:24,258 Computer, strip everything but Angela.
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:27,053 He spends all of his time in his stupid room full of toys
00:06:27,136 --> 00:06:30,264 instead of with his family. I should have married Omry.
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,934 Terry, we were totally missing the point of "manc aves."
00:06:33,017 --> 00:06:34,769 Oh, that we need to throw way more birthday parties?
00:06:34,852 --> 00:06:36,604 The best part of being in a "manc ave," Terry,
00:06:36,687 --> 00:06:39,607 is someone being irritated that you're in a "manc ave."
00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:41,567 - But I don't wanna take turns in here. - Neither do I.
00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:43,152 Which means we'll have to
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:45,738 build a robot that hates us being in the "manc ave."
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,658 - Yeah! - Terry!
00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:51,244 - By "we," you mean you, right? - Yes, I'm going to be doing all the work.
00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:52,537 I was just trying to be nice.
00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:54,580 Behold, our new robot.
00:06:54,705 --> 00:06:56,249 - Wow, that was fast. - I used a lot of parts
00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:57,291 from the last robot I made.
00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,877 The one that was supposed to kill those kids who threw a cup of pee at you?
00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:01,170 - You got over that? - For the moment,
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,296 they may keep their lives.
00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:03,589 Well, I tell you what, here's the headline.
00:07:03,673 --> 00:07:06,259 It looks great. Now did you use the specs I gave you
00:07:06,342 --> 00:07:08,386 to make her the perfect combo of every TV wife/mom?
00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:10,263 Yes, she's 20 percent annoyed wife from Raymond,
00:07:10,346 --> 00:07:12,432 twenty percent doting hot mom from Modern Family,
00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:14,642 fifteen percent fast-talking Gilmore Girls mom
00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:17,186 and ten percent Marge Simpson because she's got blue hair.
00:07:17,311 --> 00:07:19,272 - Is that too many percents? - No, it's, it's under actually.
00:07:19,355 --> 00:07:22,775 The rest is just filler code, except for a pinch of Sophia from Golden Girls.
00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:25,319 That was one sassy old lady, you know? I couldn't resist.
00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:26,821 Twenty-five, 83...
00:07:26,904 --> 00:07:29,407 Are you using your abaca-dactals like a baby?
00:07:29,490 --> 00:07:32,118 - What, what are you, 80? - Ah, now I have to start over.
00:07:32,243 --> 00:07:34,871 I call her P-A-T-R-I-C-I-A.
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:37,790 It stands for Patricia Automated Television Retro-fitted
00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:39,625 Intelligent Companion In Action.
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,335 You know what, it's okay if you made that up to fit.
00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:43,629 You chose a name with two I's and two A's. That's already hard.
00:07:43,713 --> 00:07:45,840 The important thing is not what PATRICIA stands for
00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:48,176 but that she's programmed to hate the "manc ave."
00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,804 <i>Korvo, Terry.</i>
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,265 <i>Pupa! I hope you don't plan to spend all day</i>
00:07:54,348 --> 00:07:57,435 <i>in your awful, disgusting "manc ave." We have chores to do.</i>
00:07:57,518 --> 00:07:59,520 - Why are didgeridoos so expensive? - What, what?
00:07:59,645 --> 00:08:03,107 Five thousand dollars. It's a tube! Still buying it.
00:08:03,232 --> 00:08:06,235 - Did you guys make a woman robot? - Oh, yeah, awesome, right?
00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,987 Yeah, we built her to hate the "manc ave."
00:08:08,070 --> 00:08:09,906 I mean, look at how awesome she is. Look at her, look at her go.
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,282 - She's hatin' it perfect. - No, no, no.
00:08:11,365 --> 00:08:12,909 You guys are wading into a whole gender thing.
00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:14,994 I'm telling you, this can't end well for anybody.
00:08:15,077 --> 00:08:16,120 I'm outta here. G'day.
00:08:16,245 --> 00:08:18,372 - This isn't a gender thing-- - I said g'day!
00:08:18,456 --> 00:08:21,417 No matter what the problem is, she finds a way to blame the "manc ave."
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,212 - Just, just like a real wife. - I fucking hate this "manc ave."
00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:26,589 Oh, she makes me wanna go in there so bad!
00:08:26,672 --> 00:08:29,008 - Ah, yeah! - Oh, ho, ho, it worked!
00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:35,806 Hi, guys. I, a girl, would like to be on your men's lacrosse team.
00:08:35,890 --> 00:08:38,142 I also know nothing about lacrosse.
00:08:38,226 --> 00:08:40,478 - Ha ha, did you hear that? - Oh, I heard it, Chad.
00:08:40,561 --> 00:08:42,355 But I don't believe it. Say it again, girl.
00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:45,107 Lacrosse is French for "date rape" no longer.
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:48,027 I demand to be on your boys' team. What's the problem?
00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:50,863 Can't stand a girl trying to step on your "boys only" field?
00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:53,574 No, we've been asking for a girl to join our team for years.
00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:55,785 Oh, the football guys will finally stop mocking us.
00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:57,954 No, come on, I need this to be a struggle.
00:08:58,079 --> 00:08:59,830 Chads, we got a girl on the team!
00:09:01,123 --> 00:09:03,668 Hey, stop.
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:09,048 Attention, esports team. I know that gamers are misogynistic,
00:09:09,131 --> 00:09:12,969 and that's why all female bodies in games have unrealistic proportions
00:09:13,052 --> 00:09:16,472 and are programmed to give the gamer an unhealthy amount of eye contact.
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,724 - Let me in. - Yeah, another girl!
00:09:18,808 --> 00:09:21,060 Wait, am I the only guy in here? Oh, no.
00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:23,563 I've been using some very coded language.
00:09:24,647 --> 00:09:27,358 Australian music is so good. It's like a whole genre.
00:09:27,441 --> 00:09:31,028 You're looking at this town's first female firefighter.
00:09:31,153 --> 00:09:33,698 I found my glass ceiling and fucking shattered it,
00:09:33,781 --> 00:09:35,074 and saved most of a family.
00:09:35,157 --> 00:09:37,910 Well, I'm the first woman to mansplain jazz.
00:09:37,994 --> 00:09:40,162 It's, like, all about syncopation.
00:09:40,288 --> 00:09:42,832 That's great and all, but I saved most of a family.
00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:44,750 Why do you keep saying "most of a family"?
00:09:44,875 --> 00:09:47,753 Because it sounds better than just the two dogs.
00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:49,338 Oh, Yumyulack, come here.
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,592 If I can't find a glass ceiling to break soon,
00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:55,344 they're all gonna get broken without me, and then I'm gonna fail,
00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:57,638 and then they're gonna put me in the dumb kid's class in room B.
00:09:57,722 --> 00:09:59,932 Room B is awesome. We get to do art all day.
00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:03,269 And stop telling me things. I already said I wasn't touching gender stuff.
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,604 I'm just out of ideas.
00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:06,314 You know what I do when I'm out of ideas?
00:10:06,397 --> 00:10:09,358 Cocaine. And then I get like, a million ideas at once.
00:10:10,985 --> 00:10:13,779 Ooh, ooh, I got it. Pants that fly but are also dogs.
00:10:13,904 --> 00:10:14,822 Hm.
00:10:15,531 --> 00:10:18,075 Well, I do love cocaine, but isn't it illegal?
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:20,703 Everything cool is illegal! Besides, cocaine is okay for us to eat
00:10:20,786 --> 00:10:22,413 because our alien bodies process it differently.
00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:23,706 It's just like sugar. I make it myself.
00:10:23,831 --> 00:10:27,126 Yumyulack, that's it! I should make a glass ceiling myself.
00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:29,003 - And then I'll break it. - Hey, come on.
00:10:29,086 --> 00:10:32,298 I didn't help with that epiphany. I'm just eating cocaine like we usually do.
00:10:32,381 --> 00:10:34,467 - Leave me out of it. - Thanks for your help, Yumyulack!
00:10:34,550 --> 00:10:37,053 Stop it! I'm gonna go fight my shadow!
00:10:42,099 --> 00:10:45,478 Ah, PATRICIA, I bet you hate how we sit in the "manc ave" all day
00:10:45,561 --> 00:10:48,606 while you're up here not enjoying the "manc ave."
00:10:48,689 --> 00:10:50,650 <i>What's with all the dirty dishes, Korvo?</i>
00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:52,276 I left them here for you to clean.
00:10:52,401 --> 00:10:54,362 You see this here? It's called a dishwasher.
00:10:54,445 --> 00:10:57,531 And this is how you turn it on. Ooh!
00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:00,368 Now that's at least one thing you can finally learn to turn on.
00:11:00,451 --> 00:11:03,204 Not that it matters since you're an alien who has no dick.
00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:05,873 I guess my mom was right. What am I supposed to do with that?
00:11:05,956 --> 00:11:08,125 No dick!
00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:10,044 No one's ever spoken to me like that.
00:11:10,127 --> 00:11:12,213 This angry wife subroutine must be a side effect
00:11:12,296 --> 00:11:14,173 of your anti-"manc ave" programming.
00:11:14,298 --> 00:11:17,009 Or maybe I'm just tired of being married to an idiot
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:18,511 who leaves his dirty socks in the living room.
00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,681 This must be a byproduct from all the TV mom data
00:11:21,764 --> 00:11:24,600 I fed into your personality. You're a perfect organism.
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:27,895 Byproduct? You don't make enough money to buy me any products.
00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:31,315 And the only time I can organism is when I'm watching <i>Outlander.</i>
00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:33,567 You're making me feel smaller and less of a man.
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:35,403 I love it. Quick, do it again.
00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:38,280 Quick is the only way you know how to do anything.
00:11:41,992 --> 00:11:45,121 Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, PATRICIA. I foosed my shoulder.
00:11:46,997 --> 00:11:49,250 Aw, honey, let me take care of that for you.
00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:50,501 One, two--
00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:54,880 Owie.
00:11:55,005 --> 00:11:57,133 - Does that feel better? - A little.
00:11:57,216 --> 00:11:59,844 You were a really brave little man just then.
00:11:59,927 --> 00:12:02,263 I'm so proud of you. Here.
00:12:02,346 --> 00:12:06,434 That was a special kiss from Mommy. Does that feel better?
00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:09,520 - I need another one. - There you go, sweetie.
00:12:09,603 --> 00:12:12,106 I tell you what, this mommy must be a residual byproduct
00:12:12,189 --> 00:12:13,816 of me being so brave, huh?
00:12:13,941 --> 00:12:17,445 I'm baking cookies in here. Does baby wanna lick my spoon?
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:21,949 Oh, my God, what is this feeling I'm feeling?
00:12:22,032 --> 00:12:23,617 Oh, I never want it to end.
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:38,716 - Where have you been? - Oh, oh, uh,
00:12:38,799 --> 00:12:40,176 just making this delicious sundae.
00:12:40,259 --> 00:12:41,218 - By yourself? - Uh-huh.
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:43,387 Terry, you're lying. You don't know how to peel a banana.
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,139 - I always have to do it for you. - Wait.
00:12:45,222 --> 00:12:46,724 Why are your shoulders slouched
00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:48,434 and why do you look like you have a lower sense of confidence?
00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:51,353 I was judging myself in the mirror. I'm-I'm very shameful.
00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:52,521 You don't know how to self-scrutinize.
00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:54,356 I've been hanging out with PATRICIA. She makes me feel something
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:55,858 - I've never felt before. - Me, too.
00:12:55,941 --> 00:12:56,942 - Emasculated. - Nurtured.
00:12:57,026 --> 00:12:59,069 I love the way she can just cut right through me
00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:01,530 with a real tightly wound zinger. I've never been so wonderfully beta.
00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:04,533 Oh, she wipes my mouth with a wet wipe and treats me like a baby.
00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:07,119 It's so comfortable and nurturing. I never had a mom, Korvo.
00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:09,246 - I never got baths. - Terry, I know we specifically
00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:12,082 created her to hate the "manc ave," but hear me out on this.
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:14,168 What if we altered the rules of the "manc ave"
00:13:14,251 --> 00:13:17,338 so we could invite PATRICIA to hang out with us in the "manc ave"?
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:18,714 - We'd have it all, Terry. - Oh, my God, yes.
00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:20,299 Oh, that's perfect. Let's, let's change the rules.
00:13:20,382 --> 00:13:21,967 We're gonna change the rules. Oh!
00:13:22,092 --> 00:13:24,303 But, but I hate this place.
00:13:24,386 --> 00:13:26,972 I know, I know, but it's okay. Look, huh, see?
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:29,058 It's okay for you to be here. Isn't it fun?
00:13:29,141 --> 00:13:31,811 No, it's not. Get out while you can. Run.
00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:35,147 Ignore that fish, it's joking. It's not serious. It's just having a jab.
00:13:37,191 --> 00:13:39,777 PATRICIA, I demand you overwrite your hate of the "manc ave."
00:13:39,902 --> 00:13:42,696 Override, ov-er-ride...
00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,949 funny, you never ride me over.
00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:45,950 Ooh.
00:13:46,075 --> 00:13:48,661 Can't-love-manc-ave-dig-old-bicks
00:13:56,710 --> 00:13:59,839 Must destroy manc ave!
00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:03,968 You gave her rocket launchers?
00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:07,596 It's harder to build a robot without them, Terry. They're load-bearing.
00:14:12,142 --> 00:14:13,769 Uh-oh.
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:17,314 Oh, dig old bicks. I get it now.
00:14:17,398 --> 00:14:19,984 - You do? What, what does it mean? - I don't know.
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:33,205 <i>♪ I got the eye of the tiger ♪</i>
00:14:33,289 --> 00:14:37,167 <i>♪ I am dancing through the fire ♪</i>
00:14:37,293 --> 00:14:39,670 <i>♪ I am the champion ♪</i>
00:14:39,753 --> 00:14:44,508 <i>♪ And you're gonna hear me roar ♪</i>
00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:47,678 <i>♪ Louder, louder than a lion ♪</i>
00:14:47,761 --> 00:14:50,055 <i>♪ 'Cause I am the champion ♪</i>
00:14:50,639 --> 00:14:53,851 Oh, no, please, stop. Second door on the left.
00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:58,022 Oh, no.
00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:02,943 Excuse me, pardon me. Female feminist hero comin' through.
00:15:03,027 --> 00:15:07,948 Move aside, men. I, a woman, have arrived to topple the glass ceiling
00:15:08,032 --> 00:15:10,367 and shatter the fuck out of the patriarchy.
00:15:10,492 --> 00:15:13,037 Yeah, we're looking for Jesse, the guy who set up this club.
00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:16,707 Well, I've got news for you. Jesse isn't a boy.
00:15:16,790 --> 00:15:18,500 He's a girl, and it's me.
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:20,336 Whoa, whoa, whoa. This is your club?
00:15:20,419 --> 00:15:23,213 Yep, sorry, but this isn't a boy club after all.
00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:24,924 We don't wanna join. We're here in protest
00:15:25,007 --> 00:15:27,426 to speak up for all the women who are too weak to speak for themselves.
00:15:27,551 --> 00:15:29,303 - But I made this club to-- - Do you have any idea
00:15:29,386 --> 00:15:30,888 how messed up it is to discriminate against people
00:15:30,971 --> 00:15:32,473 - based on their gender? - Uh, yeah.
00:15:32,556 --> 00:15:34,642 I was just about to say that when you interrupted--
00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:37,269 As the brother of two sisters, nothing enrages me more
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:39,521 than misogyny, and this is misogyny.
00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:40,689 - Uh-huh, it's not. - Yes, it is.
00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:42,316 You need to shut this club down right now.
00:15:42,399 --> 00:15:45,319 No, not before I topple it. I need it for my grade.
00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:47,738 If she's not gonna do it, we have to tear it down ourselves.
00:15:47,863 --> 00:15:49,114 - Please, stop. - Let's get her
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:51,492 before she creates an unsafe environment for all women.
00:15:51,575 --> 00:15:53,077 - Oh, no, no, no. - She's running.
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:56,580 - That means she's guilty. - Angry mob, bros.
00:16:01,835 --> 00:16:03,921 She's ruining the only thing I actually liked about humans.
00:16:04,004 --> 00:16:05,631 - We need to stop her. - Okay, I say we just
00:16:05,714 --> 00:16:07,633 grab her and make her tuck us into bed and read us stories.
00:16:07,716 --> 00:16:09,593 We can't just grab her, Terry. She'll slice us in half
00:16:09,677 --> 00:16:12,012 - with her laser blades. - And whose fault is that?
00:16:12,137 --> 00:16:13,722 - Huh? - I don't know what to do.
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:16,016 Wait, if she hates the "manc aves," we need to lure her
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,519 to the biggest, stupidest "manc ave" we can find.
00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:20,938 I know just the place.
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:27,653 Oh!
00:16:38,205 --> 00:16:39,415 Oh, crap, here she comes.
00:16:40,791 --> 00:16:41,709 Get inside.
00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:17,578 The activation ring. We have to get it off her finger.
00:17:17,661 --> 00:17:18,996 - Aim for the ring. - How many tickets
00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:22,374 - for all your sticky hands? - I don't know. Like, a million. Hey!
00:17:22,458 --> 00:17:25,002 Those come out of the tickets they pay me with.
00:17:26,962 --> 00:17:27,838 Now!
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:46,690 - Ms. Perez, Ms. Perez! - Jesse, what are you doing here?
00:17:46,815 --> 00:17:48,609 School stuff. You wouldn't understand!
00:17:48,692 --> 00:17:49,943 Get down!
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:52,738 Ms. Perez, I tried to make a glass ceiling to break,
00:17:52,821 --> 00:17:55,657 but a bunch of male allies got mad. You gotta help me.
00:17:55,783 --> 00:17:57,159 What the fuck are you talking about?
00:17:57,284 --> 00:18:00,120 I couldn't move us women forward, Ms. Perez. Please don't give me an F.
00:18:00,245 --> 00:18:01,580 I didn't even realize you were a girl.
00:18:01,705 --> 00:18:03,832 I thought you were gonna draw Count Dooku's lightsaber.
00:18:03,957 --> 00:18:05,459 What? But I have a bow.
00:18:05,584 --> 00:18:07,044 I don't know, you're green and your mouth
00:18:07,127 --> 00:18:09,630 extends past the boundaries of your face. How would I know?
00:18:09,755 --> 00:18:11,840 If you really wanna topple the patriarchy and get an A,
00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:14,009 - this is your chance. - You're right, Ms. Perez.
00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:16,845 Every feminist hero had their robot to conquer.
00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:28,816 Time for you two naughty/disappointing boy men
00:18:28,899 --> 00:18:30,234 to learn a lesson.
00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:34,238 PATRICIA, stop.
00:18:34,321 --> 00:18:36,365 Gender not found.
00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:38,700 That's because I'm an alien plant.
00:18:38,784 --> 00:18:41,537 It took me all this time to realize that's okay.
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:44,873 I can do whatever I want. So can you.
00:18:44,998 --> 00:18:47,543 But I'm a mom, I'm a wife, I'm a mom, I'm a--
00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:50,379 No way, Jose. You're a killer robot.
00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:53,382 And if that's what makes you happy, then lean into it.
00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:56,927 I don't have to kill men. I could be killing anyone I want.
00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:59,429 No matter what gender. I could kill everyone!
00:18:59,555 --> 00:19:01,431 Ha, not today.
00:19:01,515 --> 00:19:07,062 No, I was about to kill all humans in the world...
00:19:07,938 --> 00:19:10,274 Patricia, I'm sorry. But I have to turn you off.
00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:14,444 You turn me off every day when you take off your shirt.
00:19:14,528 --> 00:19:16,363 What's wrong, Korvo? Why-why'd you stop?
00:19:16,446 --> 00:19:19,449 I can't deactivate her, Terry. I didn't realize I had a hole in my heart.
00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:21,743 A hole that needed to be demeaned with a non-stop barrage
00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:25,956 of insults and sexual criticism. We can't kill her, but we can't live with her.
00:19:26,039 --> 00:19:27,291 So what do we do?
00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:30,169 We started this thinking we needed a "manc ave"
00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:32,254 to fill a gaping hole inside of us.
00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:33,881 But what we truly needed was to know
00:19:33,964 --> 00:19:36,550 that we have different types of gaping holes
00:19:36,633 --> 00:19:38,552 that need other ways to be filled.
00:19:38,677 --> 00:19:40,804 You taught us that we don't have to hide in an "ave," Mom.
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,181 - Thank you. - We can't kill you
00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:44,308 and we can't have you going around and setting stuff on fire.
00:19:44,391 --> 00:19:46,476 So from now on, you'll live in this shipping container.
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:48,187 Do we really have to get rid of her?
00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:50,898 Maybe we can keep her around like a feminist icon.
00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:53,525 Your dress is too short. Boys will think you're a slut.
00:19:53,609 --> 00:19:55,152 You're not my real mom! Shut up!
00:19:55,235 --> 00:19:57,279 Patricia, it's time to get in the container.
00:19:57,362 --> 00:20:00,282 Don't worry, you won't be bored. I made you a cuck-bot for company.
00:20:00,365 --> 00:20:03,368 Does anyone want to go to the Gap and make some returns?
00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:05,370 I didn't try to make him look like Ted Cruz.
00:20:05,454 --> 00:20:06,872 It just happens with these things.
00:20:06,955 --> 00:20:08,749 - Hello. - You're wearing that?
00:20:08,832 --> 00:20:11,752 I thought I threw that out. Why are you making that face?
00:20:11,877 --> 00:20:13,754 - I'm not making a face. - God, you're annoying.
00:20:13,837 --> 00:20:16,632 Could you be more nasal? A real man wouldn't let an alien
00:20:16,715 --> 00:20:18,842 bury him in a shipping container.
00:20:18,967 --> 00:20:20,552 It's nice to know that any time we miss her,
00:20:20,636 --> 00:20:23,764 we can come outside and we know that she's just a few feet down there
00:20:23,847 --> 00:20:25,474 just ripping into him, you know?
00:20:25,557 --> 00:20:28,268 On how he brushes his teeth, and how he doesn't arch his back properly.
00:20:28,352 --> 00:20:30,520 The way he stands all crooked and how he's all weasley
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:33,273 and thin and not muscly or anything.
00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:36,026 - Yeah. - Wow, I just had the craziest week.
00:20:36,109 --> 00:20:38,654 Oh, yeah, you weren't around. What were you doing this whole time?
00:20:38,779 --> 00:20:41,073 I accidentally let hundreds of koalas out of the zoo
00:20:41,156 --> 00:20:43,533 and then spent a ton of time rounding them all up.
00:20:43,659 --> 00:20:46,495 The zoo has the capacity to house hundreds of koalas?
00:20:46,578 --> 00:20:50,499 Yeah, they were running all over town. I had to coax them with didgeridoos.
00:20:50,582 --> 00:20:54,127 It was on the news. Like, you-you didn't see any of that?
00:20:55,295 --> 00:20:57,005 <i>Okay, get in, get in here, get in.</i>
00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:58,966 Hey, so how did your gender-based stories turn out?
00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:01,551 Uh, good, yeah. I mean, I think we covered every angle
00:21:01,635 --> 00:21:03,136 and pretty much solved it, so.
00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:06,056 Yeah, I think everyone will be very happy with what we did.
00:21:06,139 --> 00:21:08,016 Well, I'm glad we survived, because I don't think
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:10,686 there's a more controversial topic we could have dealt with.
00:21:10,811 --> 00:21:12,562 Okay, class. Next assignment,
00:21:12,646 --> 00:21:15,983 everyone here has to find a racist and teach them the error of their ways.
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:17,567 Yay!

00:00:48,261 --> 00:01:06,780 ПРОДАНО
00:01:23,880 --> 00:01:33,724 СЛАДКИЕ БУЛОЧКИ
00:01:47,487 --> 00:01:50,073 БЕКОН, САЛАТ И ПОМИДОР
00:02:47,881 --> 00:02:49,925 ШКОЛА ИМЕНИ ДЖЕЙМСА ЭРЛА ДЖОНСА ПРОДАЕТСЯ
00:04:23,393 --> 00:04:35,947 БАКЛАЖАН В ШТАНАХ
00:04:46,041 --> 00:04:55,842 ОДНО ХОЛОДНЕНЬКОЕ
00:07:35,752 --> 00:07:45,845 МУЖИЦКО ЕЛОГОВО БЕЗ БАБ
00:09:23,568 --> 00:09:25,152 ШКОЛА ИМЕНИ ДЖЕЙМСА ЭРЛА ДЖОНСА ПРОДАЕТСЯ
00:09:25,152 --> 00:09:31,033 ГРУППА MEN AT WORK НОТЫ К ПЕСНЕ LAND DOWN UNDER
00:10:47,735 --> 00:10:49,195 {\an8}КОЛИЧЕСТВО КРОШЕК: 1752 (ПОСУДА ГРЯЗНАЯ) АКТИВИРОВАН РЕЖИМ НЕРВОЗНОЙ ТЕЛЕЖЕНЫ
00:10:49,195 --> 00:10:50,488 {\an8}УРОВЕНЬ ТУПОСТИ: 100% ОБНАРУЖЕН ТУПОЙ МУЖЛАН
00:11:45,126 --> 00:11:46,877 {\an8}СЛЕЗЫ ПЕРЕРОСТКА, У КОГО-ТО БО-БО АКТИВИРОВАН РЕЖИМ ДОБРОЙ ТЕЛЕМАМОЧКИ
00:12:34,425 --> 00:12:36,844 ПАЦАНСКИЙ КЛУБ, ПОСЛЕ УРОКОВ ПО ЧЕТВЕРГАМ НИКАКИХ ДЕВЧОНОК (ПРИНОСИТЕ ПЕНИСЫ)
00:13:35,152 --> 00:13:39,782 {\an8}ЦЕЛЬ - ЗАБОТИТЬСЯ О ТЕРРИ
00:13:48,207 --> 00:13:51,001 {\an8}ЦЕЛЬ - НЕНАВИДЕТЬ МУЖИЦКО ЕЛОГОВО
00:14:22,533 --> 00:14:25,411 {\an8}ЦЕЛЬ - НЕНАВИДЕТЬ МУЖИЦКО ЕЛОГОВО
00:14:41,844 --> 00:14:43,178 {\an8}ОБНАРУЖЕНЫ МЕРЗКИЕ МУЖИКИ
00:16:31,286 --> 00:16:34,247 {\an8}ГДЕ-ТО ИГРАЕТ СПОРТИВНАЯ МЕЛОДИЯ РЕСТОРАН "ДЭЙВ ЭНД БАСТЕРС"
00:16:34,247 --> 00:16:35,749 {\an8}АКТИВИРОВАН РЕЖИМ УНИЧТОЖЕНИЯ
00:16:46,259 --> 00:16:48,136 ФУТБОЛ И ГРЯЗНЫЕ МУЖИКИ СЕКСИТСКАЯ ШУТКА, АВТОМАТЫ
00:18:30,238 --> 00:18:32,324 {\an8}АКТИВИРОВАН РЕЖИМ УНИЧТОЖЕНИЯ
00:18:32,324 --> 00:18:33,867 {\an8}ГЕНДЕР НЕ УСТАНОВЛЕН

Скриншоты

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 1

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 2

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 3

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 4

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 5

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 6

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 7

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 8

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 9

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 10

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 11

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 12

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 13

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 14

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 15

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 16

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 17

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 18

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 19

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 20

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 21

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 22

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 23

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 24

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 25

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 26

Устройство П.А.Т.Р.И.Ц.И.Я — скриншот 27