Гигантская голова Юмьюлака

00:00:11,230 --> 00:00:12,830

Я попрал имя божье.

00:00:12,860 --> 00:00:17,510

Я согрешил и вдул персиковый йогурт себе

в анус и дал коту его слизать.

00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:20,250

Твою мать! Коту? Меня сейчас стошнит.

00:00:20,290 --> 00:00:21,820

Вам можно такое говорить?

00:00:21,850 --> 00:00:23,380

Я думал, это безопасное место.

00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:25,020

Да. Чтобы я надрал тебе зад!

00:00:25,980 --> 00:00:27,270

Какого чёрта, отче?

00:00:27,320 --> 00:00:29,080

Я заохотил твою голову, сучка!

00:00:32,550 --> 00:00:33,570

Респект.

00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:40,070

Я дома.

00:00:40,130 --> 00:00:42,400

Не говорите со мной, пока не выпью.

00:00:42,430 --> 00:00:45,740

Знаю, что пожалею,

но почему ты одет как Папа Римский?

00:00:45,780 --> 00:00:47,920

О, Терри, ограниченная ты шлюшка.

00:00:47,950 --> 00:00:49,820

Это прикрытие для охоты за головами.

00:00:49,830 --> 00:00:51,020

Это моя маскировка.

00:00:51,050 --> 00:00:52,440

Рад, что ты повеселился.

00:00:52,470 --> 00:00:54,730

А я сегодня пытался пососать свою шишку.

00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:57,340

Представляю вам нового Пупу.

00:00:58,960 --> 00:00:59,660

О боже!

00:00:59,700 --> 00:01:01,460

Что за маленький Пеннивайз?

00:01:01,580 --> 00:01:02,560

Чапупа!

00:01:02,650 --> 00:01:04,590

Это его новая милая фразочка.

00:01:04,630 --> 00:01:06,180

Эй, эй, что это ещё такое?

00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:08,360

Особая комброча Глена Пауэлла.

00:01:08,390 --> 00:01:12,110

Я сегодня охотился за головами,

теперь мне хочется бактерий.

00:01:12,510 --> 00:01:13,170

Какого хрена?

00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:15,010

Подростки не пьют такое дерьмо.

00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:18,320

Разве не круче дунуть тяпку или немного тмина?

00:01:18,350 --> 00:01:22,670

Что ты несёшь? Комброча продаётся специально

для идиотов моего возраста.

00:01:22,700 --> 00:01:26,540

Ясно. Дело в том, что комбуча ядовита для шлорпиан.

00:01:26,570 --> 00:01:28,290

Но Джесси и Терри тоже пьют!

00:01:29,550 --> 00:01:31,660

Наш вкус никому не важен.

00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:32,450

Джесси, нет!

00:01:32,480 --> 00:01:35,160

Вкус? Как это понимать? Почему мой вкус важен?

00:01:35,210 --> 00:01:38,560

Потому что я должен убить тебя и скормить Пупе.

00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:40,140

Корво, нет!

00:01:42,480 --> 00:01:47,300

Планета Шлорп была просто идеальной,

пока на неё не грохнулся астероид.

00:01:47,610 --> 00:01:51,917

Сотне взрослых особей и их репликантам выдали

по Пупе и отправили в космос,

00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:54,690

на поиски необитаемого мира, нашего нового дома.

00:01:54,770 --> 00:01:58,320

Мы рухнули на Землю, планету, кишащую людьми.

00:01:58,370 --> 00:02:01,200

Да-да, это мой голос. Я держу Пупу.

00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:02,870

Меня зовут Корво. Это мой сериал.

00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:04,180

Я уронил Пупу, видите?

00:02:04,210 --> 00:02:07,340

Как же нелепо. Ненавижу Землю! Отстойная планета!

00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:08,960

Люди тупые и странные.

00:02:08,970 --> 00:02:11,130

Почему я не могу сам качать бензин в Нью-Джерси?

00:02:11,140 --> 00:02:13,110

Меня только это успокаивает на Земле.

00:02:13,130 --> 00:02:15,180

Вот бы вся атмосфера была парами.

00:02:15,220 --> 00:02:17,250

На хороших планетах все дышат нефтью.

00:02:17,310 --> 00:02:20,390

СОЛНЕЧНЫЕ ПРОТИВОПОЛОЖНОСТИ

00:02:23,070 --> 00:02:25,020

Нет!

00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:28,280

Что произошло? Что это была за херня?

00:02:28,310 --> 00:02:30,640

Усаживающий на диван луч. Выслушай меня.

00:02:30,660 --> 00:02:32,110

Я думал, ты меня убьёшь.

00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:33,330

Я бы такого не сделал.

00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:34,250

Вот и хорошо.

00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:36,130

Стоп. Нет, я постоянно это делаю.

00:02:36,170 --> 00:02:38,580

Но сначала я объясню, почему я это делаю.

00:02:38,610 --> 00:02:39,610

Из уважения ко мне?

00:02:39,640 --> 00:02:42,660

Нет, растерянность портит вкус твоей кожи.

00:02:42,670 --> 00:02:44,970

Раз в три месяца происходит нечто особое.

00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:48,090

Я тебя убиваю, смалываю в пюре и скармливаю Пупе.

00:02:48,150 --> 00:02:49,020

Это неправда!

00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:50,120

О да, это правда.

00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:53,800

Видишь ли, Пупа должен есть твоё мясо раз

в 90 дней, чтобы не умереть.

00:02:53,810 --> 00:02:56,670

Я живу тут столько же, сколько и ты. Такого не было.

00:02:56,790 --> 00:02:58,385

Было. Ты просто не помнишь,

00:02:58,390 --> 00:03:02,187

потому что мы выгружаем твоё сознание

на жёсткий диск корабля

00:03:02,190 --> 00:03:03,940

и переносим его в новый мозг.

00:03:03,980 --> 00:03:06,890

Но убийство не загружаем, чтобы ты не истерил.

00:03:06,970 --> 00:03:08,860

Ясно. Так почему я здесь?

00:03:08,900 --> 00:03:11,030

Позволь мне всё показать.

00:03:11,050 --> 00:03:12,150

Чапупа!

00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:13,740

Это правда очень мило.

00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:17,030

Аиша, где жеода с инструкцией к Пупе?

00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:19,530

Не гребу. Я тебе не Мэри Поппинс.

00:03:19,590 --> 00:03:21,090

Супер. Я её сохранил.

00:03:21,140 --> 00:03:23,320

Руководство пользователя Пупы. В кварце.

00:03:24,730 --> 00:03:25,870

РУКОВОДСТВО ПОЛЬЗОВАТЕЛЯ ПУПЫ

00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:26,840

ЗАГРУЗКА

00:03:26,850 --> 00:03:30,710

Несоблюдение правил кормления Пупы

мясом репликанта приведёт к смерти.

00:03:30,720 --> 00:03:31,870

ВНИМАНИЕ

00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:35,840

Забота о Пупе приведёт к его эволюции

и терраформированию мира.

00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:39,141

Вы можете кормить Пупу

кусочками питательного репликанта

00:03:39,150 --> 00:03:40,970

или смолоть его и подать целиком.

00:03:40,980 --> 00:03:42,540

Вот, мы так делаем!

00:03:43,140 --> 00:03:44,400

Здравствуй, репликант.

00:03:44,410 --> 00:03:46,450

Хорошо поохотился за головами?

00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:48,230

Да, лидер. Очень хорошо.

00:03:52,150 --> 00:03:53,010

Ну и идиот.

00:03:53,290 --> 00:03:54,140

Дичь какая.

00:03:54,160 --> 00:03:58,306

Теперь лидер перерабатывает белки репликанта

безболезненным методом,

00:03:58,310 --> 00:04:00,530

разработанным шлорпианскими врачами.

00:04:01,790 --> 00:04:03,720

Не выглядит это безболезненно.

00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,550

Он же про лидера. Он никакой боли не чувствует.

00:04:10,740 --> 00:04:12,870

Только посмотрите на него.

00:04:13,260 --> 00:04:16,600

А теперь я выгружаю воспоминания. Минус парочку.

00:04:19,770 --> 00:04:24,267

Через пару недель новое тело начнёт

производить питательные вещества,

00:04:24,270 --> 00:04:25,420

и цикл повторится.

00:04:25,500 --> 00:04:27,720

Не показывайте видео репликанту.

00:04:27,730 --> 00:04:29,350

Это жуткая дичь меня пугает!

00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:32,060

Не бойся. Страх не повлияет на вкус твоей плоти.

00:04:32,100 --> 00:04:34,020

Хватит говорить о моей плоти!

00:04:34,060 --> 00:04:36,850

Так вы убиваете меня и Джесси, когда хотите?

00:04:36,900 --> 00:04:39,470

Нет. Меня не убивают. Только тебя.

00:04:39,490 --> 00:04:40,630

Почему только меня?

00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:42,320

У нас есть свои обязанности.

00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:46,100

Я летописец, Терри заботится о Пупе,

Корво — капитан.

00:04:46,110 --> 00:04:47,810

А ты питательный репликант.

00:04:47,850 --> 00:04:51,090

Я охотник за головами.

Я сегодня охотился за головами.

00:04:51,130 --> 00:04:53,000

Мы не в «Звёздных войнах», братан.

00:04:53,030 --> 00:04:55,016

Шлорпианские старейшины придумали это,

00:04:55,020 --> 00:04:57,650

чтобы вы не задавали вопросы

о своей настоящей роли.

00:04:57,660 --> 00:04:59,940

Но я видел, как Пупа ест всякий фастфуд.

00:04:59,980 --> 00:05:00,870

Пусть его и ест.

00:05:00,890 --> 00:05:01,900

Это пустые калории.

00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:04,480

Терри и Джесси пообещали не кормить его этим.

00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:05,430

Мы так и делаем.

00:05:05,460 --> 00:05:07,630

Да, мы говорим ему «нетушки-приветушки».

00:05:07,700 --> 00:05:08,500

Чапупа!

00:05:08,560 --> 00:05:12,060

Быть питательным репликантом —

величайшая честь.

00:05:12,070 --> 00:05:14,330

Твоя задача важнее всех наших.

00:05:14,780 --> 00:05:17,210

Блин, он выглядит таким голодным.

00:05:17,560 --> 00:05:20,730

Бедняжка. Ладно. К чёрту всё. Я в деле.

00:05:20,850 --> 00:05:22,690

Ты же сохранишь мою память, да?

00:05:22,730 --> 00:05:26,000

Да. И после ты не будешь этого помнить.

Всё будет, как прежде.

00:05:26,020 --> 00:05:29,200

Можно в этот раз я сделаю всё сам?

00:05:29,210 --> 00:05:31,510

Конечно. Как хочешь: мечом, огнемётом?

00:05:31,530 --> 00:05:33,970

Или потирая шишку, пока вешаешься в кладовой?

00:05:34,020 --> 00:05:35,430

Простой лазер подойдёт.

00:05:35,470 --> 00:05:38,610

Держи. Сейчас возьму кристалл

для сохранения памяти.

00:05:39,100 --> 00:05:42,150

Подойдёте ко мне с кристаллом —

башку нахрен снесу!

00:05:42,180 --> 00:05:43,380

Чапупа?

00:05:44,250 --> 00:05:44,990

Отойдите.

00:05:45,030 --> 00:05:46,830

Всё не так плохо, как кажется.

00:05:46,870 --> 00:05:48,320

Мы напечатаем нового тебя.

00:05:48,350 --> 00:05:51,000

Мы уберём эти воспоминания.

Тебе не будет грустно.

00:05:51,030 --> 00:05:55,690

В этом ты прав. Мне не будет грустно,

потому что я развалю принтер.

00:05:55,740 --> 00:05:58,040

Немедленно убейте себя, мистер!

00:06:03,730 --> 00:06:05,740

Нет!

00:06:06,290 --> 00:06:07,700

Заляпал футболку!

00:06:10,540 --> 00:06:12,670

Пупа умрёт с голоду без мяса Яма.

00:06:12,710 --> 00:06:14,060

Наша миссия обречена.

00:06:14,110 --> 00:06:17,900

Мы все умрём, и я никогда не попаду

на экскурсию на фабрику шуб «Бёрлингтон»!

00:06:17,930 --> 00:06:20,550

Всем успокоиться. Дайте мне подумать.

00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:22,330

Пупа, съешь это. Это полезно.

00:06:22,500 --> 00:06:23,660

Чапупа.

00:06:23,890 --> 00:06:25,220

Оно гадкое и горелое.

00:06:25,230 --> 00:06:26,360

Он должен что-то есть.

00:06:26,390 --> 00:06:28,880

А если скормить ему что-то другое из нашего мира?

00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:33,200

Да! Я специально припрятал

шлорпианские батончики из сухпайков.

00:06:33,260 --> 00:06:35,520

Я такое делаю. Думаю наперёд.

00:06:35,570 --> 00:06:38,690

Чёрт. Я съел их в том году,

когда у нас закончили закуски.

00:06:38,710 --> 00:06:40,030

Они были на чёрный день!

00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:41,750

Это был самый чёрный день.

00:06:41,780 --> 00:06:45,180

Мне пришлось разом посмотреть

второй сезон «Тени и кости»,

00:06:45,190 --> 00:06:47,730

чтобы первым заспойлерить его в «Дискорде».

00:06:47,770 --> 00:06:48,700

Вот. Лизни обёртку.

00:06:48,740 --> 00:06:49,950

Нет. Чапупа.

00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:53,392

Вы оставайтесь тут

и уговорите его лизнуть обёртку,

00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:55,040

а я пойду чинить принтер.

00:06:56,150 --> 00:06:58,720

А клей для ресниц достаточно прочный?

00:06:58,750 --> 00:07:02,950

Это клей для ресниц дрэг-квин,

нашёл его у Терри на столике. Выдержит.

00:07:02,990 --> 00:07:04,940

Думал, какое у тебя будет дрэг-имя?

00:07:04,980 --> 00:07:08,560

Моё — Нефертитьки,

потому что у меня были бы здоровенные титьки.

00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:09,760

Неплохо.

00:07:09,880 --> 00:07:11,540

Ну, посмотрим, что вышло.

00:07:15,190 --> 00:07:18,090

Жуть. Просканируй

на наличие питательных веществ.

00:07:18,100 --> 00:07:20,380

Сканирую. Она вся корявая.

00:07:20,420 --> 00:07:21,950

Пупе от неё толку не будет.

00:07:21,980 --> 00:07:23,510

Чёрт. И принтеру капец.

00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:24,700

Нужно что-то придумать.

00:07:24,890 --> 00:07:26,290

Она увеличивается?

00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:28,560

Блин. Частицы роста вышли из-под контроля.

00:07:28,610 --> 00:07:30,810

Аиша, открой люк. Сбросим её с корабля.

00:07:30,850 --> 00:07:33,450

Чёрт, чёрт. Блин, гадость, фу, чёрт.

00:07:36,330 --> 00:07:37,800

Ты оставишь её вот так?

00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:40,150

Позвоню в вывоз мусора. Во вторник заберут.

00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:42,330

Город такое не оценит.

00:07:42,460 --> 00:07:44,780

Ну что ты. Ну давай хотя бы немножечко.

00:07:45,530 --> 00:07:46,360

Ням-ням.

00:07:46,370 --> 00:07:46,670

Нет!

00:07:46,860 --> 00:07:50,560

Терри, смотри.

У меня есть старый Old Spice Ямюляка!

00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,610

Там точно куча его бактерий.

00:07:52,650 --> 00:07:55,890

Да! Держи, Пупи. Со вкусом спортивной сумки.

00:07:57,940 --> 00:07:59,180

Ты в порядке, малыш?

00:07:59,190 --> 00:08:00,300

Чапупа...

00:08:05,620 --> 00:08:07,560

Он выпердел кофейный столик?

00:08:07,700 --> 00:08:10,520

О нет. Он будто из моей квартиры в нашем мире.

00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:13,090

Твой Пупа выпердел его с оранжевой жижей.

00:08:13,130 --> 00:08:14,440

Что, прости? Мой Пупа?

00:08:14,460 --> 00:08:15,670

Ты меня слышал.

00:08:18,170 --> 00:08:21,173

Пупа преждевременно извергает

терраформирующую жидкость

00:08:21,180 --> 00:08:22,880

от нехватки питательных веществ.

00:08:22,890 --> 00:08:23,960

Отстой какой.

00:08:24,070 --> 00:08:25,800

Почему всё такое шлорпианское?

00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:28,800

Потому что в его ДНК закодированы вещи из дома.

00:08:28,830 --> 00:08:29,960

Это же хорошо.

00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,820

Пупа должен терраформировать.

00:08:32,290 --> 00:08:34,050

Сейчас он неуправляем.

00:08:34,090 --> 00:08:35,380

Его тело сдаётся.

00:08:35,410 --> 00:08:38,530

Это деструктивный процесс,

который разрушит планету.

00:08:38,550 --> 00:08:41,400

Если Пупа не поест, его пердёж ухудшится.

00:08:41,540 --> 00:08:45,100

Он умрёт вместе с нашими шансами

на восстановление нашего мира.

00:08:45,110 --> 00:08:48,100

Пупа уже попробовал плоть,

давайте найдём человека,

00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:50,080

похожего на Ямюляка и скормим ему.

00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:51,442

Да, это может сработать.

00:08:51,450 --> 00:08:54,510

Но это должен быть жалкий,

уродливый лузер, как Ямюляк.

00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:57,490

Вы тоже видите летающую голову Ямюляка?

00:08:57,520 --> 00:08:59,550

Что? Не парься. Кто знает, откуда она.

00:08:59,590 --> 00:09:03,828

Солнечные противоположности

должны найти жалкого человечишку,

00:09:03,830 --> 00:09:05,330

который пахнет ногами.

00:09:06,590 --> 00:09:07,270

Дальше.

00:09:07,420 --> 00:09:09,140

Привет, сосед Кевин.

00:09:09,170 --> 00:09:12,040

Ты будешь читать строчки Ямюляка.

00:09:12,100 --> 00:09:14,580

Так круто. Всегда мечтал быть актёром.

00:09:14,630 --> 00:09:17,118

Я раньше снимал видео

со стыковкой членов на YouTube,

00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:19,700

пока алгоритмы

не стали блокировать крайнюю плоть.

00:09:19,720 --> 00:09:20,390

Дальше.

00:09:20,580 --> 00:09:23,400

Привет, я Шон Джамброун.

Я снимался в «Голдбергах» на ABC.

00:09:23,420 --> 00:09:23,980

Дальше!

00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:26,500

Спасибо, что пригласили.

У меня есть особые навыки.

00:09:26,530 --> 00:09:28,960

Я сертифицированный покерфейс...

00:09:30,140 --> 00:09:30,530

Сука!

00:09:30,540 --> 00:09:31,294

Директор Кук!

00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:33,460

Прикольно видеть вас в реальном мире.

00:09:33,520 --> 00:09:36,320

Для прослушивания мы разыгрываем сцену из «Дюны».

00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:38,010

Поставьте ногу в коробку.

00:09:38,060 --> 00:09:39,890

ПОСТАВЬ НОГУ СЮДА

00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:44,710

Ой, меня, кажется, что-то лижет.

00:09:44,740 --> 00:09:47,810

Когда пройдёт страх облизывания,

останешься только ты.

00:09:48,260 --> 00:09:49,970

Теперь оно меня кусает! Так и знал!

00:09:50,070 --> 00:09:54,101

Эти больные интернет-извраты

хотят только фотки ваших кровавых ног,

00:09:54,110 --> 00:09:55,470

за которые не заплатят!

00:09:55,480 --> 00:09:57,190

До свидания, директор Кук.

00:09:58,040 --> 00:09:59,190

Чапупа.

00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:01,450

Проклятье, Пупа. Мы пытаемся тебе помочь.

00:10:04,860 --> 00:10:08,890

Это мой банк из нашего мира.

Там был ужасный график работы. Бегите!

00:10:12,760 --> 00:10:14,730

Мои друзья и любовник, вариантов нет.

00:10:14,790 --> 00:10:16,860

Принтер Ямюляков починить нельзя.

00:10:16,910 --> 00:10:17,950

Пупа не поест.

00:10:17,980 --> 00:10:20,660

Над Денвером летает огромная башка Ямюляка.

00:10:20,690 --> 00:10:21,530

В жопу Денвер!

00:10:21,580 --> 00:10:25,361

Боюсь, на этот раз нам

не решить проблему научно-фантастически.

00:10:25,370 --> 00:10:27,010

Бедный Пупа. Мне очень жаль.

00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:31,820

Да ладно, Корво. Не будь сучкой. Расскажи им.

00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:32,460

Аиша, нет.

00:10:32,580 --> 00:10:34,710

Что? По поводу чего тебе не быть сучкой?

00:10:34,740 --> 00:10:36,060

Давай, расскажи им.

00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:39,410

Не могу. Это момент слабости,

о котором я долго молчал.

00:10:40,130 --> 00:10:43,190

То, что я расскажу,

может потрясти вас до глубины души.

00:10:43,220 --> 00:10:46,400

Это может разрушить основы,

на которых наши отношения...

00:10:46,430 --> 00:10:47,110

Да говори уже!

00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:50,380

Есть ещё один Ямюляк.

00:10:54,740 --> 00:10:57,440

От такого потрясения я аж проголодался!

00:10:57,480 --> 00:10:59,480

Почему сэндвичи «Джерси Майка» такие вкусные?

00:10:59,530 --> 00:11:02,070

Они покупают масло и уксус на трассе Нью-Джерси.

00:11:02,090 --> 00:11:05,560

А что ты имел в виду, когда сказал,

что есть ещё один Ямюляк?

00:11:05,590 --> 00:11:08,570

Однажды я не убил Ямюляка, а дал ему сбежать.

00:11:08,610 --> 00:11:11,630

Я не помню подробностей. Всё будто в тумане.

00:11:11,700 --> 00:11:13,550

Ничего. Я всё сняла.

00:11:13,570 --> 00:11:16,400

Нет! Нет-нет. Не нужно смотреть ту запись.

Это неважно.

00:11:16,440 --> 00:11:17,464

Я установила камеру,

00:11:17,470 --> 00:11:20,260

когда кто-то начал красть

моих фарфоровых жабок, Терри!

00:11:20,270 --> 00:11:21,030

Смотрите.

00:11:23,780 --> 00:11:24,560

Что ты делаешь?

00:11:24,720 --> 00:11:26,520

Прошу, не убивай меня.

00:11:26,530 --> 00:11:29,430

Я и не хотел.

Я хотел высосать твою память, а потом убить.

00:11:29,440 --> 00:11:32,810

Нет, пожалуйста. Папа, не надо этого делать.

00:11:32,930 --> 00:11:33,380

Папа?

00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:36,460

Иди.

00:11:36,550 --> 00:11:37,760

Ты меня не убьёшь?

00:11:37,790 --> 00:11:40,650

У меня есть копия твоей памяти.

Иди, пока я не передумал.

00:11:40,930 --> 00:11:41,990

Чтоб тебя, Аиша.

00:11:42,670 --> 00:11:45,200

Он назвал меня папой.

Ямюляки так раньше не делали.

00:11:45,210 --> 00:11:48,170

Он был такой милый. Не то что предыдущие Ямюляки.

00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:52,080

О, Корво. Я думал, только у меня проблемы с папой.

00:11:52,100 --> 00:11:55,020

Я пытался их развить

в подарок тебе на День Сезара Чавеса.

00:11:55,030 --> 00:11:56,340

Но видимо, переборщил.

00:11:56,390 --> 00:11:59,190

О боже. Хватит быть таким терпилой!

00:11:59,210 --> 00:12:02,940

Ты наш лидер. Соберись немедленно!

00:12:02,980 --> 00:12:05,220

Твой Пупа сереет и пуляет жижей.

00:12:05,320 --> 00:12:08,190

Мы должны найти Ямюляка. Куда он ушёл?

00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:13,230

Я тогда любил есть жаркое,

так что отправил его мирно жить в Ирландии.

00:12:13,270 --> 00:12:16,230

Плюс, я знал,

что Терри никогда не приедет туда из-за Эджа.

00:12:16,260 --> 00:12:18,840

Этот сучонок в бини с бородкой украл мой прикид!

00:12:21,070 --> 00:12:23,480

Свежие ягоды коникса, продаю...

00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:26,120

Где я?

00:12:26,350 --> 00:12:27,990

Чапупа.

00:12:29,340 --> 00:12:30,580

У нас мало времени!

00:12:30,630 --> 00:12:34,250

Аиша, присмотри за Пупой

и попробуй починить принтер Ямюляков.

00:12:34,310 --> 00:12:35,460

Я собралась на перерыв.

00:12:35,470 --> 00:12:36,744

Запишу, как сверхурочные.

00:12:36,750 --> 00:12:40,149

Мы летим в Ирландию, схватим Ямюляка,

привезём сюда и покормим Пупу

00:12:40,150 --> 00:12:40,960

, пока не поздно.

00:12:40,980 --> 00:12:44,570

Говорю сразу: если я увижу Эджа, я мимо не пройду.

00:12:44,610 --> 00:12:46,870

Я дам ему леща, чтоб бородка отлетела.

00:12:46,940 --> 00:12:49,230

Для него это будет неприятный день.

00:12:55,380 --> 00:12:57,050

ИРЛАНДСКИЙ ПАБ «ОДРИНКИ»

00:12:57,910 --> 00:12:59,480

Какое причудливое место.

00:12:59,830 --> 00:13:02,110

Это Эдж играет на скрипке в углу?

00:13:02,500 --> 00:13:05,410

Терри, это женщина и ей лет 90.

00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:07,950

Привет. Меня зовут Шеймус Одринки.

00:13:08,060 --> 00:13:10,160

Это мой семейный ирландский паб.

00:13:10,280 --> 00:13:12,910

Мы ищем это недоразумение. Такого роста.

00:13:12,940 --> 00:13:16,910

Называет себя Ямюляк

или Супер-мазила Таркин, никнейм из Xbox.

00:13:16,950 --> 00:13:18,570

Простите. Ничем не могу помочь.

00:13:18,620 --> 00:13:21,960

Я бы запомнил такого нелепого парня,

если бы он заходил.

00:13:21,970 --> 00:13:22,890

Всё равно спасибо.

00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,550

Я слежу за тобой, скрипичная шлюха.

00:13:31,690 --> 00:13:33,810

Мак-Ямюляк, это Шеймус.

00:13:33,860 --> 00:13:37,280

Похоже, твой папаня наконец-то приехал.

00:13:39,160 --> 00:13:41,601

Смотрите, я знаю только одного засранца,

00:13:41,610 --> 00:13:44,960

которому нужно столько

экстремально кислой газировки.

00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:46,330

Это сучий Эдж.

00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:48,250

О господи. Это Ямюляк.

00:13:48,270 --> 00:13:50,280

Боже, Терри. Да забей уже.

00:13:53,090 --> 00:13:55,640

Наверное, тут он живёт. Смотрите на название.

00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:57,920

Тема. Эй, да вон же он!

00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:01,990

Да это будет проще, чем два пальца обоссать.

00:14:02,030 --> 00:14:05,850

Я рада увидеть Ямюляка,

даже его дешёвую ирландскую версию.

00:14:05,890 --> 00:14:08,470

Только без эмоций. Он просто корм для Пупы.

00:14:09,060 --> 00:14:11,240

Тупой провод. Кто-то мог споткнуться.

00:14:11,270 --> 00:14:13,980

Я пну его через три, две и...

00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:14,640

Терри, нет!

00:14:17,340 --> 00:14:20,940

Вы, говнюки, не заберёте меня отсюда. Отвалите!

00:14:21,050 --> 00:14:23,000

Этот Ямюляк совсем не приятный.

00:14:23,030 --> 00:14:24,860

И говорит так по-ирландски.

00:14:24,890 --> 00:14:27,090

Он меня обманул, назвав папой.

00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:29,490

Нужно схватить эту суку сейчас же.

00:14:30,330 --> 00:14:31,810

Ура! Ещё один провод.

00:14:31,830 --> 00:14:33,070

Терри, оставь его в покое.

00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:33,880

Ладно.

00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:37,720

Ямюляк?

00:14:38,110 --> 00:14:41,590

Мы пришли поздороваться

и посмотреть, как ты тут живёшь.

00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:45,060

Чушь собачья! И я теперь Мак-Ямюляк.

00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:46,900

Это моё ирландское имя.

00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:48,130

Ему очень идёт.

00:14:48,150 --> 00:14:50,430

Я много лет ждал и планировал этот день.

00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:55,530

Весь дом набит ловушками.

Лучше не рыпайтесь, не то устрою вам пекло.

00:14:55,550 --> 00:15:00,000

Знаю, мы ненавидим его за мудачество,

но он тут неплохо устроился.

00:15:00,020 --> 00:15:03,140

Да. Может, оставить его?

Пусть будет ирландцем с миром. Мир!

00:15:03,150 --> 00:15:06,828

Нет! Нужно вернуть его домой

и скормить Пупе, иначе не будет планеты,

00:15:06,830 --> 00:15:09,000

на которой Ирландия — жемчужина короны.

00:15:09,010 --> 00:15:10,570

Я это слышал!

00:15:13,090 --> 00:15:16,480

Оставьте нашего друга

или мы сожжём и закопаем вас!

00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:19,410

Чёрт. Всё наше оружие конфисковали в аэропорту.

00:15:19,470 --> 00:15:21,730

Это не «Аэр Лингус», а подстава какая-то.

00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:25,000

Зато «Аэр Лингус» —

самая сексуальная авиакомпания.

00:15:25,010 --> 00:15:27,880

Нужно хватать Мак-Яма за яйца и уматывать.

00:15:27,980 --> 00:15:32,510

Ну что, тупоголовые селюки,

срал я с высокой башни на ваш клевер.

00:15:32,570 --> 00:15:35,010

И Киллиан Мёрфи может у меня отсосать!

00:16:07,250 --> 00:16:07,860

А ты хорош.

00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:09,610

У меня был хороший учитель.

00:16:09,690 --> 00:16:10,530

О, ты обо мне?

00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:14,820

Нет, чёртов идиот!

Я про сэнсэя Шона в клубе карате «Опанчиз»!

00:16:19,070 --> 00:16:21,670

Добей его, Корво! Добей его!

00:16:22,030 --> 00:16:23,750

Папа? Прошу, не убивай меня.

00:16:23,780 --> 00:16:26,990

У меня нет выбора. Я не твой папа. Я лидер.

00:16:27,030 --> 00:16:28,860

А ты корм, необходимый Пупе.

00:16:28,890 --> 00:16:30,180

Это мой и твой долг.

00:16:30,220 --> 00:16:34,740

Ты давно научил меня заботиться только

о самом себе.

00:16:34,770 --> 00:16:35,860

Так я и поступлю.

00:16:37,750 --> 00:16:38,790

Нет!

00:16:40,460 --> 00:16:43,120

О боже. Они провалились под лёт. Где они?

00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:45,790

Покойтесь с миром, Корво и Ямюляк.

00:16:46,780 --> 00:16:51,350

И что делать двум одиноким подружкам в городе,

полном подавленных европейских мужчин?

00:16:52,040 --> 00:16:53,240

Он у меня! Я...

00:16:53,500 --> 00:16:54,850

Вы хотели вот так уйти?

00:16:54,870 --> 00:16:59,100

Вы оба провалились под лёд!

В фильмах это конец. Сам погугли.

00:16:59,150 --> 00:17:00,890

Вы и пять секунд не подождали.

00:17:00,950 --> 00:17:02,670

Ну, тут холодно. Уж прости.

00:17:17,830 --> 00:17:20,480

И да, Эдж просто сидел в аэропорту Дублина.

00:17:20,530 --> 00:17:23,080

Он очень приятный. Подарил мне свою бини.

00:17:23,150 --> 00:17:25,610

Сказал, что мы оба можем носить бини и не спорить.

00:17:25,650 --> 00:17:28,570

Да. Больше никаких соревнований,

всё разрешилось.

00:17:28,610 --> 00:17:31,140

Нужно разобраться, пока Пупе не стало хуже.

00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:32,460

Это ещё не конец.

00:17:32,500 --> 00:17:33,890

А где твой акцент?

00:17:33,900 --> 00:17:36,410

Пропадает,

если не смотрю фильмы Колина Фаррелла.

00:17:36,420 --> 00:17:38,330

Мак-Ямюляк, я хочу извиниться.

00:17:38,360 --> 00:17:39,710

Я не хотел, чтобы было так.

00:17:39,770 --> 00:17:43,953

Если бы я мог изменить правила,

я бы не убивал тебя снова и снова,

00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:45,280

чтобы скормить Пупе.

00:17:45,330 --> 00:17:46,770

Ну да. Ты наркоман!

00:17:46,780 --> 00:17:49,350

Я выкачаю твою память,

на случай починки принтера.

00:17:49,380 --> 00:17:52,480

Может, признаешь, что ты мудак, и отпустишь меня?

00:17:52,490 --> 00:17:54,680

Прости. Сейчас не то время.

00:17:55,550 --> 00:17:56,750

Стой!

00:17:56,970 --> 00:17:57,460

Что?

00:17:57,490 --> 00:17:58,680

Было не то время.

00:17:58,710 --> 00:17:59,540

Отойди с дороги!

00:17:59,560 --> 00:18:02,770

Когда ты отпустил Мак-Яма,

ты сразу распечатал нового?

00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:03,630

Да, конечно.

00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:05,400

И скормил его Пупе?

00:18:05,420 --> 00:18:07,580

Нет. Нутриенты формируются две недели.

00:18:07,590 --> 00:18:12,080

Но пока ты ждал,

Пупа не изрыгал терраформирующую жижу.

00:18:12,420 --> 00:18:14,280

Стоп. Ты права. Не изрыгал.

00:18:14,290 --> 00:18:16,300

Ага! И что это значит?

00:18:16,340 --> 00:18:19,460

Это значит, что он получал нутриенты

из чего-то другого.

00:18:19,510 --> 00:18:22,510

Может, Пупу кормили чем-то, чтобы он выжил.

00:18:22,550 --> 00:18:25,310

Это невозможно. Мы не даём Пупе земную еду.

00:18:25,340 --> 00:18:26,860

Вы обещали этого не делать.

00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:28,550

Ой-ой.

00:18:28,580 --> 00:18:30,270

Вы что-то ему давали? Что это было?

00:18:30,300 --> 00:18:32,050

Мы игнорили твоё правило.

00:18:32,090 --> 00:18:33,330

Кормили его всяким.

00:18:33,360 --> 00:18:38,860

Мы знали, что он получит все витамины и минералы

из Ямюляка, так что другое не помешает.

00:18:38,890 --> 00:18:40,990

Я же прямо сказал — нет людской еде.

00:18:41,020 --> 00:18:43,120

Ещё перед полётом на другую планету.

00:18:43,150 --> 00:18:43,760

Что это было?

00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:45,410

Наверное, McDonald’s.

00:18:45,460 --> 00:18:46,890

Супер. Едем в McDonald’s.

00:18:46,930 --> 00:18:47,730

Или Burger King.

00:18:47,790 --> 00:18:50,746

Ясно. Мне не нравится,

что вы настолько игнорили правила,

00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:51,610

но и его закажем.

00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:53,800

И Wendy’s, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut, Domino’s...

00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:56,350

Wingstop, Papa John’s, KFC, Panda Express...

00:18:56,380 --> 00:18:58,740

Но ни разу Long John Silver's!

00:18:58,770 --> 00:19:02,450

Да. На Long John Silver's мы провели черту.

Мы не чудовища.

00:19:02,490 --> 00:19:03,990

Некогда сужать поиск.

00:19:04,020 --> 00:19:05,210

Пупа умирает.

00:19:05,250 --> 00:19:07,420

Скормим ему Ямюляка, а потом разберёмся.

00:19:07,460 --> 00:19:08,960

Я голосую за сужение.

00:19:08,990 --> 00:19:10,110

Прости, выхода нет.

00:19:12,820 --> 00:19:13,940

Чапупа.

00:19:14,050 --> 00:19:15,450

Стой. Ты это слышал?

00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:16,680

Хватит тормозить.

00:19:16,690 --> 00:19:18,260

Я не торможу! Пупа говорит!

00:19:18,780 --> 00:19:20,370

Чапупа.

00:19:20,420 --> 00:19:22,810

И? Он постоянно болтает своё «чапупа».

00:19:22,850 --> 00:19:24,330

Это мило, но не поможет.

00:19:24,350 --> 00:19:26,830

А что если он хочет сказать «чалупа»?

00:19:32,010 --> 00:19:33,000

Представляете?

00:19:33,010 --> 00:19:35,670

Малыш всё время пытался сказать, что ему нужно.

00:19:35,770 --> 00:19:37,110

Классика Солнечных.

00:19:37,140 --> 00:19:38,920

Вкусняшка чапупа!

00:19:39,050 --> 00:19:42,510

Раз мы можем кормить Пупу чалупой,

можно меня не убивать?

00:19:42,550 --> 00:19:45,600

Не люблю менять распорядок,

но сделаю исключение.

00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:49,270

Кто знал, что чалупа содержит те же витамины,

что мясо инопланетян?

00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:52,020

Пупа так напитался, что эволюционирует!

00:19:52,050 --> 00:19:55,070

Чапупа!

00:19:55,280 --> 00:19:57,390

Ого. Только посмотрите.

00:19:57,410 --> 00:20:00,780

Он даже изменил цвет под конец сезона.

00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:02,200

И это я про осень.

00:20:02,210 --> 00:20:05,090

Я рада,

что мы закончил день без серьёзных перемен.

00:20:05,110 --> 00:20:08,970

Не то что в том году,

когда пришлось улетать с планеты.

00:20:09,010 --> 00:20:13,940

Точно. Мы спасли Пупу, Ямюляка не нужно убивать,

и ничего плохого не вышло.

00:20:13,990 --> 00:20:16,250

Победа Солнечных противоположностей!

00:20:16,290 --> 00:20:18,240

Терри, звони в колокол!

00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:19,280

Ура!

00:20:19,290 --> 00:20:19,610

Да!

00:20:19,620 --> 00:20:20,110

Да!

00:20:20,120 --> 00:20:22,550

Дин-дон! Дин-дон!

00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:26,250

Я буду жить! Чалупа, чалупа, чалупа!

00:20:26,260 --> 00:20:27,410

Да!

00:20:34,360 --> 00:20:38,440

Да, я на шаг ближе

к восстановлению контроля над миссией.

00:20:38,830 --> 00:20:42,120

Ещё немного. Ещё чуть-чуть.

00:20:48,550 --> 00:20:50,854

Чёрт. И как мне отсюда спуститься?

00:20:50,860 --> 00:20:55,850

Переведено студией HDrezka Studio.

00:00:11,094 --> 00:00:12,721

I took the Lord's name in vain.

00:00:12,721 --> 00:00:13,972

I was covetous,

00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:16,349

and I put some Yoplait peach yogurt

in my butthole

00:00:16,349 --> 00:00:17,434

and let a cat lick it.

00:00:17,434 --> 00:00:19,060

Holy shit. Ew! A cat?

00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:20,145

You're gonna make me barf.

00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:21,730

Are you supposed to talk like that?

00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:23,273

I thought this was a safe space.

00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:24,858

Yeah.

For me to kick your ass!

00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,193

What the hell, Father?

00:00:27,193 --> 00:00:28,987

You just got bounty-hunted, bitch!

00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:33,575

Respect.

00:00:38,621 --> 00:00:39,998

I'm home.

00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:42,333

Nobody talk to me

until I get something to drink.

00:00:42,333 --> 00:00:43,918

I know I'm gonna regret asking this,

00:00:43,918 --> 00:00:45,670

but why are you dressed like the Pope?

00:00:45,670 --> 00:00:47,839

Oh, Terry, you ignorant slut.

00:00:47,839 --> 00:00:49,674

I have to lay low when I bounty hunt.

00:00:49,674 --> 00:00:50,967

This is my undercover gear.

00:00:50,967 --> 00:00:52,343

Well, I'm glad you had fun.

00:00:52,343 --> 00:00:54,679

All I did today was try

to suck my own mound.

00:00:54,679 --> 00:00:57,348

I present you the new Pupa.

00:00:57,849 --> 00:00:59,559

- Ah!

- Oh, my God!

00:00:59,559 --> 00:01:01,352

Why does he look like

a baby Pennywise?

00:01:01,352 --> 00:01:02,562

Cha Pupa!

00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:04,522

Aw! That's his cute new thing he says.

00:01:04,522 --> 00:01:05,982

Whoa, whoa, whoa. What is that?

00:01:05,982 --> 00:01:08,276

Glen Powell's specialty Kom-BRO-cha.

00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:09,986

I did a bunch of bounty hunting today,

00:01:09,986 --> 00:01:11,946

and it got me real thirsty for bacteria.

00:01:11,946 --> 00:01:13,073

What the hell?

00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,949

No teenager wants to drink that shit.

00:01:14,949 --> 00:01:16,951

Wouldn't you rather smoke a fat J

00:01:16,951 --> 00:01:18,244

or huff some cumin?

00:01:18,244 --> 00:01:19,329

What are you talking about?

00:01:19,329 --> 00:01:22,582

The Kom-BRO-cha is marketed

specifically to idiots my age.

00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:26,419

Okay. The truth is kombucha

is poisonous to Shlorpians.

00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,129

But Jesse and Terry are drinking them!

00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:32,217

- Mm. Doesn't matter how we taste.

- Jesse, no!

00:01:32,217 --> 00:01:34,969

Taste? What does that mean?

Why does how I taste matter?

00:01:34,969 --> 00:01:38,431

It matters because I need to kill you

and feed you to the Pupa.

00:01:38,431 --> 00:01:41,643

Korvo, no!

00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:44,979

Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia,

00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:47,232

until the asteroid hit.

00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:50,235

One hundred adults and their replicants

were issued a Pupa

00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:52,237

and escaped into the... space,

00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:54,697

searching for new homes

on uninhabited worlds.

00:01:54,697 --> 00:01:55,990

We crashed on Earth,

00:01:55,990 --> 00:01:58,243

{\an8}stranding us on an already

overpopulated planet.

00:01:58,243 --> 00:01:59,869

{\an8}That's right, I've been talking

this whole time.

00:01:59,869 --> 00:02:01,079

{\an8}I'm the one holding the Pupa.

00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:02,789

{\an8}My name is Korvo. This is my show.

00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,124

{\an8}Bollocks, I just dropped the Pupa.

00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:06,167

{\an8}Ugh. This is ridiculous. I hate Earth.

00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:07,252

{\an8}It's a horrible home.

00:02:07,252 --> 00:02:08,962

{\an8}People are stupid and confusing.

00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:11,047

{\an8}Why can't I pump my own gas

in New Jersey?

00:02:11,047 --> 00:02:13,049

{\an8}It's the only Earth activity

that calms me down.

00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:15,135

{\an8}I wish the entire atmosphere was fumes.

00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,178

{\an8}All the good planets let you breathe oil.

00:02:23,059 --> 00:02:26,020

No!

00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:28,189

What's happening here?

What the hell was that?

00:02:28,189 --> 00:02:30,650

{\an8}The ray that makes you sit on the couch

to hear some hard news.

00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:32,026

{\an8}I thought you were gonna kill me.

00:02:32,026 --> 00:02:34,070

{\an8}- I would never do that.

- Okay, good.

00:02:34,070 --> 00:02:36,030

Wait. No, I do do it regularly.

00:02:36,030 --> 00:02:38,366

But first I'm going

to explain why I do it.

00:02:38,366 --> 00:02:39,534

Because you respect me.

00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:41,494

{\an8}No, because confusion

can make your skin taste

00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:42,662

{\an8}like the bottom of a flip-flop.

00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:44,873

Every three months,

a very special thing happens.

00:02:44,873 --> 00:02:46,791

I murder you,

blend your body into mush,

00:02:46,791 --> 00:02:47,917

and feed you to the Pupa.

00:02:47,917 --> 00:02:50,044

- No, you don't!

- Oh, yes, I do.

00:02:50,044 --> 00:02:53,590

See, the Pupa needs to be fed your meat

every 90 days or he dies.

00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:56,676

I've lived here just as long as you

and that's literally never happened.

00:02:56,676 --> 00:02:58,678

Yes, it has. You just don't remember

00:02:58,678 --> 00:03:01,181

because we upload your consciousness

to the ship's hard drive

00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,892

and transfer your memories

to a new brain before I bap you.

00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:06,895

But we leave out the murder memory

so you don't get all pissy.

00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:08,813

Okay, fine. Then why am I here?

00:03:08,813 --> 00:03:10,940

{\an8}Allow me to show and tell you.

00:03:10,940 --> 00:03:12,025

{\an8}Cha Pupa!

00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:13,818

Huh. That really is cute.

00:03:13,818 --> 00:03:15,945

AISHA, where did I put

that instructional geode

00:03:15,945 --> 00:03:17,030

{\an8}that came with the Pupa?

00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:19,532

Don't ask me.

I'm not Mary friggin' Poppins.

00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:20,992

{\an8}Oh, nice. We actually kept it.

00:03:20,992 --> 00:03:23,203

{\an8}The Pupa Owner's Manual, Quartz Edition

00:03:26,789 --> 00:03:28,666

Caution.

Failing to feed your Pupa

00:03:28,666 --> 00:03:30,710

replicant meat will result in death.

00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:33,963

Proper care of your Pupa

will ensure it evolves

00:03:33,963 --> 00:03:35,840

and terraforms your new world.

00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:38,676

You could feed your Pupa choice cuts

of the nutrient replicant

00:03:38,676 --> 00:03:40,887

or just blend and serve whole.

00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:42,972

Oh, that's what we do.

Shh!

00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:44,307

{\an8}Hello, replicant.

00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:46,392

{\an8}Have you had a fulfilling day

of bounty hunting?

00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:48,144

{\an8}Yes, team leader. I sure have.

00:03:52,148 --> 00:03:54,025

{\an8}- What an idiot.

- I hate this.

00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:55,568

{\an8}The team leader now processes

00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,862

{\an8}the replicant's proteins

in the painless method

00:03:57,862 --> 00:04:00,615

{\an8}devised by our Shlorpian doctors.

00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,660

{\an8}That doesn't seem painless.

00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:06,579

{\an8}He means for the team leader.

He's not in any pain.

00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,877

Aw, look at him go.

00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:16,547

And now I upload the memories,

minus just a few.

00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:21,970

In a few weeks,

the new body will begin

00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:25,348

to produce nutrients,

and the cycle will begin again.

00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:27,725

Under no circumstances should this video

be shown to your nutrient replicant.

00:04:27,725 --> 00:04:29,352

This is freaking me out!

00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:31,980

{\an8}Don't worry. Being freaked doesn't affect

the flavor of your flesh.

00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:34,023

Ugh! Stop talking about my flesh!

00:04:34,023 --> 00:04:36,693

So you guys just kill me

and Jesse whenever you want?

00:04:36,693 --> 00:04:39,195

No. Not me. Just you.

00:04:39,195 --> 00:04:40,488

Why just me?

00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:42,240

{\an8}We all have mission jobs.

00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:44,617

{\an8}I'm the chronicler,

Terry cares for the Pupa,

00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:45,785

{\an8}Korvo's team leader.

00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,704

{\an8}And you're the nutrient replicant.

00:04:47,704 --> 00:04:50,999

{\an8}I'm the bounty hunter.

I literally bounty-hunted this morning.

00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:52,917

{\an8}This isn't Star Wars, bro.

00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:54,711

{\an8}That's something

the Shlorpian elders made up

00:04:54,711 --> 00:04:57,588

{\an8}so you wouldn't question your actual role

as a delicious treat.

00:04:57,588 --> 00:04:59,841

{\an8}But I've seen the Pupa eat

all sorts of fast food and junk.

00:04:59,841 --> 00:05:01,801

{\an8}- Just let him eat that.

- No, it's empty calories.

00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:04,304

{\an8}Terry and Jesse promised

they'd stop feeding him that stuff.

00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,388

{\an8}We've been good.

00:05:05,388 --> 00:05:08,433

{\an8}- Yeah, we just say, "No way, Jose."

- Cha Pupa!

00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:12,061

Being the nutrient replicant is

the highest honor a Shlorpian can have.

00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:14,439

Your job is the most important

out of all of us.

00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:17,400

Oh, man.

He is looking pretty hungry.

00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,737

Poor little guy.

Okay, screw it. I'm in.

00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:22,613

Plus you'll save

my memories anyway, right?

00:05:22,613 --> 00:05:24,657

Yep. And after, you won't even remember.

00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:25,950

We'll be back to normal.

00:05:25,950 --> 00:05:29,203

Do you mind if this one time

I do it myself?

00:05:29,203 --> 00:05:31,414

Sure. How do you wanna do it?

Sword? Flamethrower?

00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:33,916

That thing where you rub your mound

while hanging yourself in the closet?

00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:35,376

Just a simple ray will do.

00:05:35,376 --> 00:05:39,005

Here you go. Let me just grab the crystal

that sucks your memories out. Ah!

00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:41,883

Anyone comes at me with the crystal,

I'll blow your fucking head off!

00:05:41,883 --> 00:05:43,217

Cha Pupa?

00:05:43,217 --> 00:05:44,886

- Ah!

- Stay back.

00:05:44,886 --> 00:05:46,679

It's not as bad as it sounds.

00:05:46,679 --> 00:05:48,264

We just print out another you.

00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:50,892

We can take all these memories away too.

You won't be sad at all.

00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:52,977

Oh, you're right about that.

I won't be sad.

00:05:52,977 --> 00:05:55,605

Because I'm blasting the Me Machine.

00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:57,982

Put that ray gun down

and kill yourself right now, mister!

00:06:03,654 --> 00:06:05,740

No!

00:06:06,282 --> 00:06:07,700

He ruined my shirt!

00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:12,580

The Pupa's gonna starve

without his Yum meat.

00:06:12,580 --> 00:06:13,998

The mission's doomed.

00:06:13,998 --> 00:06:15,958

We're all gonna die,

and I never even got to tour

00:06:15,958 --> 00:06:17,794

the Burlington Coat Factory factory!

00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:20,463

Everyone chill the fuck out.

Uh, let me workshop this.

00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:22,382

Pupa, eat this. It's good for you.

00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,883

Cha Pupa.

00:06:23,883 --> 00:06:26,260

- It's all gross and burnt up.

- He needs to eat it to live.

00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:28,763

What if we feed the little guy

something else from the home world?

00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:31,724

{\an8}Yes! I purposely hid some

Shlorpian powdered calorie chunks

00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:33,101

{\an8}in the emergency rations kit.

00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:35,436

'Cause that's what I do.

I think ahead, baby.

00:06:35,436 --> 00:06:38,564

Oh, shit. I ate the chunks last year

when we ran out of snacks.

00:06:38,564 --> 00:06:39,982

Those were for emergencies!

00:06:39,982 --> 00:06:41,692

It was an emergency.

00:06:41,692 --> 00:06:44,112

I had to binge all of

Shadow and Bone season two

00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,446

so I could spoil it on Discord

00:06:45,446 --> 00:06:47,573

before my Discord dudes

could spoil it for me.

00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:49,951

- Here. Lick the wrappers.

- No. Cha Pupa.

00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:51,035

You two stay down here

00:06:51,035 --> 00:06:52,662

and try to get the Pupa

to lick that wrapper

00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:55,039

while I go work on fixing

the Yumyulack printer.

00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:58,584

Are you sure that

makeup glue's strong enough?

00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:00,753

This is drag brunch grade

eyelash adhesive

00:07:00,753 --> 00:07:02,880

I got from Terry's vanity. It'll work.

00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:04,841

You ever think about

what your drag name would be?

00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:06,342

Mine's Nefertitties

00:07:06,342 --> 00:07:08,302

'cause I would have some big old titties.

00:07:08,302 --> 00:07:09,762

Oh, that is good.

00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:11,180

Alright, let's see if this thing works.

00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,979

Ugh, this doesn't look right.

Scan this thing for nutrients.

00:07:17,979 --> 00:07:20,273

Scanning.

That thing is all jacked up.

00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,858

The Pupa won't get anything from that.

00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:23,443

Damn it. And the printer's shot.

00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:24,735

We'll have to try something else.

00:07:24,735 --> 00:07:26,237

Is it expanding?

- Oh!

00:07:26,237 --> 00:07:28,489

Oh, shit. The growth particles

are out of control.

00:07:28,489 --> 00:07:30,741

AISHA, open the hatch.

We have to get it off the ship.

00:07:30,741 --> 00:07:33,453

Oh, crap, crap. Shitty, shitty, crap.

00:07:36,247 --> 00:07:37,707

Are you gonna just leave it there?

00:07:37,707 --> 00:07:40,084

I'll call heavy item pickup.

They'll get it on Tuesday.

00:07:40,084 --> 00:07:42,336

The city is not going like that.

00:07:42,336 --> 00:07:44,589

Oh, come on. Just a wittle-bitty taste.

00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:46,674

- Mm, yummy.

- No!

00:07:46,674 --> 00:07:50,470

Terry, look. I got Yum's

Old Spice Swagger deodorant!

00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,555

This has to be loaded with Yum germs.

00:07:52,555 --> 00:07:55,892

Oh, yeah! Here you go, Pupes.

It's gym bag flavored.

00:07:57,935 --> 00:07:59,187

Are you okay, little guy?

00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:01,564

Oh, cha Pupa...

00:08:03,191 --> 00:08:04,317

Ah!

00:08:05,610 --> 00:08:07,695

He just sharted a side table?

00:08:07,695 --> 00:08:10,448

Oh, no. This looks like it came

from my apartment on the home world.

00:08:10,448 --> 00:08:12,867

Your Pupa just sharted it out

with some orange goo.

00:08:12,867 --> 00:08:15,536

- Excuse me? My Pupa.

- You heard me.

00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:20,333

The Pupa is prematurely

squirting out terraforming fluids

00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,793

because his body's malnourished

without his nutrients.

00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:23,961

Well, that blows.

00:08:23,961 --> 00:08:25,713

Why does it all look like Shlorpian stuff?

00:08:25,713 --> 00:08:27,381

Because he has everything

from the home world

00:08:27,381 --> 00:08:28,716

coded into his DNA.

00:08:28,716 --> 00:08:29,884

Isn't this a good thing?

00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:32,136

Don't we want the Pupa to terraform?

00:08:32,136 --> 00:08:33,971

This isn't a controlled terraformation.

00:08:33,971 --> 00:08:35,306

The Pupa's body is breaking down.

00:08:35,306 --> 00:08:37,225

This is a destructive

and uncontrollable process

00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:38,351

that will ruin this planet.

00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:39,936

If the Pupa doesn't get nutrients soon,

00:08:39,936 --> 00:08:41,437

his sharting will get worse.

00:08:41,437 --> 00:08:43,523

He'll die and so will our chances

00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:45,107

of rebuilding the home world.

00:08:45,107 --> 00:08:46,734

Pupa already has a taste for flesh,

00:08:46,734 --> 00:08:48,819

so let's just find a human

similar to Yumyulack

00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:49,946

and feed them to him.

00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:51,280

Yes, that could work,

00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:53,407

but it would have to be

a real pathetic, ugly loser

00:08:53,407 --> 00:08:54,617

just like Yumyulack.

00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:57,328

Uh, are you seeing

this floating Yumyulack head out there?

00:08:57,328 --> 00:08:59,455

What? Don't worry about that.

Who knows where that came from?

00:08:59,455 --> 00:09:01,666

The Solar Opposites have to find

00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:05,294

a petty bounty hunting-type human

who smells like a foot.

00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:09,048

Next.

Hello, neighbor Kevin.

00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:11,968

You will be reading

for the part of Yumyulack.

00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:14,512

This is so cool.

Always wanted to be an actor.

00:09:14,512 --> 00:09:16,806

You know, back in the day,

I made some docking videos

00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:19,600

on YouTube before the algorithm

demonetized foreskin.

00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:21,686

- Next.

- Hi, I'm Sean Giambrone.

00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:23,229

I used to be on ABC's The Goldbergs.

00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:24,939

- Next!

- Thank you for inviting me.

00:09:24,939 --> 00:09:26,440

I have many special skills.

00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:29,068

I am a pre-certified Poker Face who--

00:09:29,068 --> 00:09:31,279

Ow! Shit! Fuck!

Principal Cooke,

00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:33,406

always fun to see you out

in the real world.

00:09:33,406 --> 00:09:34,657

Okay, so for the audition,

00:09:34,657 --> 00:09:36,325

we're workshopping a scene from Dune.

00:09:36,325 --> 00:09:37,618

Put your foot in that box.

00:09:41,622 --> 00:09:44,542

Uh, oh, I feel something licking me.

00:09:44,542 --> 00:09:47,420

When the fear of being licked is gone,

only you will remain.

00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:50,172

Ow! Now it's biting me. I knew it!

00:09:50,172 --> 00:09:52,258

These sicko internet perverts

just want pics

00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:55,469

of your bloody feet,

and they aren't gonna pay for them!

00:09:55,469 --> 00:09:57,013

Bye, Principal Cooke.

00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:59,015

Uh, cha Pupa.

00:09:59,015 --> 00:10:01,017

Goddammit, Pupa.

We're trying to help you, you little shit.

00:10:04,812 --> 00:10:06,480

That's my bank from the home world.

00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:08,774

It had terrible operating hours. Run!

00:10:12,653 --> 00:10:14,697

Well, my friends and lover,

we're out of moves.

00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,782

The Yumyulack-making machine

can't be fixed.

00:10:16,782 --> 00:10:17,867

The Pupa won't eat.

00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:20,578

There's a big-ass Yumyulack head

floating over Denver.

00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:22,496

- Fuck Denver!

- I fear, for once,

00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:24,707

we can't sci-fi our way out of this.

00:10:24,707 --> 00:10:26,917

Poor Pupa. I'm so sorry.

00:10:28,794 --> 00:10:30,921

Come on, Korvo.

Don't be a little bitch.

00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:32,465

- Just tell them.

- AISHA, no.

00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:34,592

What? What shouldn't you be

a little bitch about?

00:10:34,592 --> 00:10:35,968

You gotta tell them.

00:10:35,968 --> 00:10:39,930

I can't. It's a moment of weakness

I've held for so long. Ugh.

00:10:39,930 --> 00:10:43,142

What I'm about to reveal

may shake you to your very cores.

00:10:43,142 --> 00:10:45,061

It may destroy the foundation on which

00:10:45,061 --> 00:10:47,021

- our relationship has been--

- Just tell us!

00:10:47,021 --> 00:10:50,232

There is... another Yumyulack.

00:10:54,737 --> 00:10:57,365

Gasping so hard at that revelation

got me so hungry!

00:10:57,365 --> 00:10:59,367

Why are Jersey Mike's sammies so good?

00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,952

They get their oil and vinegar

straight from the New Jersey Turnpike.

00:11:01,952 --> 00:11:03,037

Hey, what did you mean

00:11:03,037 --> 00:11:05,247

that one time you said

there's another Yumyulack?

00:11:05,247 --> 00:11:06,874

Hmm. Well, one time,

I didn't kill Yumyulack

00:11:06,874 --> 00:11:08,501

and feed him to the Pupa.

I let him escape.

00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:10,670

I-I-I don't really remember the details.

00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:13,464

It's a bit of a haze.

We good. I got that shit on tape.

00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:16,342

No! No, no. We don't have

to watch the tape. That's not important.

00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,427

I put in a Ring camera

after someone kept stealing

00:11:18,427 --> 00:11:20,262

my porcelain frogs, Terry!

00:11:20,262 --> 00:11:21,347

Check it out.

00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:24,558

- Ah!

- What are you doing?

00:11:24,558 --> 00:11:26,602

Please, don't stab me.

00:11:26,602 --> 00:11:27,687

No, I-I wasn't.

00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,313

I was gonna suck out your memories

and then kill you.

00:11:29,313 --> 00:11:32,817

No, but please.

Papa, don't do that either.

00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:34,026

Papa?

00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:35,986

Ah.

00:11:35,986 --> 00:11:37,655

- Go.

- You're not gonna kill me?

00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:38,864

I've got a copy of your memories.

00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:40,658

Now go before I change my mind.

00:11:41,075 --> 00:11:42,159

Damn you, AISHA.

00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:45,204

He called me Papa.

No Yumyulack has ever said that.

00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:48,124

He was so sweet. Not like all

the other dipshit Yumyulacks.

00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:51,961

Oh, Korvo. I thought I was

the only one with daddy issues.

00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:54,922

I've been trying to develop them

as a Cesar Chavez Day present to you.

00:11:54,922 --> 00:11:56,257

But I guess it worked too well.

00:11:56,257 --> 00:11:59,051

Oh, my God. Stop being such a pushover!

00:11:59,051 --> 00:12:02,847

You're team leader, man.

Pull yourself together!

00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:05,224

Your Pupa is getting gray

and blasting goo.

00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:08,102

We've gotta find that Yumyulack.

When did you let him go?

00:12:08,102 --> 00:12:10,187

It was back when I was really

into eating stews,

00:12:10,187 --> 00:12:13,149

so I got the idea to send him

to live a peaceful existence in Ireland.

00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:16,068

Plus, I knew Terry would never go there

due to his feud with The Edge.

00:12:16,068 --> 00:12:18,571

Well, that goateed,

beanie-wearing bitch stole my look!

00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:24,577

Fresh konixberries for sa...

00:12:25,035 --> 00:12:26,120

Where am I?

00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:27,997

Cha Pupa.

00:12:29,331 --> 00:12:30,499

We're running out of time!

00:12:30,499 --> 00:12:32,376

AISHA, watch the Pupa

and see if you can get

00:12:32,376 --> 00:12:34,128

the Yumyulack-making machine

working again.

00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:35,463

I was about to go on break.

00:12:35,463 --> 00:12:37,381

You'll get OT. We'll fly to Ireland,

00:12:37,381 --> 00:12:39,175

grab that tender-ass Yumyulack,

bring him back,

00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:40,843

and feed the Pupa before it's too late.

00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:42,303

You know,

I-I-I'm just telling you right now,

00:12:42,303 --> 00:12:44,555

if I see The Edge, I'm not gonna walk on.

00:12:44,555 --> 00:12:46,807

I'm gonna slap that goatee

right off his face.

00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:49,101

It's not gonna be a beautiful day for him.

00:12:57,902 --> 00:12:59,487

This place looks hella quaint.

00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:02,114

Wait, is that The Edge

playing the fiddle in the corner?

00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:05,576

Terry, that's a lady and she's, like, 90.

00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:07,953

Hello. Name's Seamus O'Drinky.

00:13:07,953 --> 00:13:10,164

This is me family's Irish pub.

00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:12,792

We're looking for a sweet

wannabe fuckboy. Ye high.

00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,084

Might go by the name Yumyulack

00:13:14,084 --> 00:13:15,544

or Grand Muff Tarkin,

00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:16,837

his Xbox name.

00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:18,464

Sorry. Can't help you.

00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:21,842

I'd remember if a funny-looking fella

like that came in here.

00:13:21,842 --> 00:13:25,554

- Thanks for your time.

- I'm watching you, fiddle slut.

00:13:31,685 --> 00:13:33,854

McYumyulack, it's Seamus.

00:13:33,854 --> 00:13:38,025

Seems your Pa's finally come to town.

00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:41,612

Look, you know only one dirty-ass hoe

00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:44,865

{\an8}would need that much

X-Treme Sour Gooseberry Rockstars.

00:13:44,865 --> 00:13:46,242

That son of a bitch The Edge.

00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:48,160

Oh, my God. It's Yumyulack.

00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,287

Jesus, Terry. Get over it.

00:13:53,082 --> 00:13:55,793

This must be his place. Look at the name.

00:13:55,793 --> 00:13:57,962

Classy. Hey, there he is!

00:13:58,796 --> 00:14:01,841

Oh, this is gonna be easy peasy,

Dan Cortese.

00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:03,634

I'm excited to see Yumyulack,

00:14:03,634 --> 00:14:05,761

even if it is a low-rent Irish version.

00:14:05,761 --> 00:14:08,472

Don't bring emotion into this.

He's just Pupa food.

00:14:08,472 --> 00:14:11,100

Ah, stupid wire.

Someone could trip on this.

00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:13,894

I'm gonna kick it in three, a-two, and...

00:14:13,894 --> 00:14:16,355

Terry, don't!

00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:21,193

You arseholes

aren't taking me back. Get fucked!

00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:22,862

That Yumyulack's not sweet or tender.

00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,655

And he talks all Irishy now?

00:14:24,655 --> 00:14:26,991

He played me, calling me Papa.

00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:29,618

We gotta take this bitch down now.

00:14:30,327 --> 00:14:31,662

Oh, hell, yeah. Another wire.

00:14:31,662 --> 00:14:32,997

Terry, would you just leave it?

00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:34,248

Fine.

00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:37,918

Yumyulack?

00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:41,589

We just came to say hi

and see how things are going.

00:14:41,589 --> 00:14:44,967

Bull shite! And I go by McYumyulack now.

00:14:44,967 --> 00:14:46,760

That's me Irish name.

00:14:46,760 --> 00:14:48,053

I really like that for him.

00:14:48,053 --> 00:14:50,431

For years, I've waited

and planned for this day.

00:14:50,431 --> 00:14:53,392

Booby-trapped the whole house,

so don't come any closer

00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:55,477

or I'll blow yas to hell.

00:14:55,477 --> 00:14:57,479

I know we hate on the guy

for being such a dick,

00:14:57,479 --> 00:14:59,899

but he's really made

a life for himself here.

00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:03,068

Yeah. Maybe we should peace out

and just let him be Irish in peace. Peace!

00:15:03,068 --> 00:15:06,196

No! We need to get him to the house,

chop him up, and feed him to the Pupa

00:15:06,196 --> 00:15:08,908

or there won't be a planet

for Ireland to be the crown jewel of.

00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:10,576

I heard that!

00:15:13,078 --> 00:15:16,290

Leave our lad alone or we'll burn you up

and bury you in the peat!

00:15:16,290 --> 00:15:19,335

Damn it. All our sci-fi weapons

got confiscated at the airport.

00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:21,629

Aer Lingus, more like ass dingus.

00:15:21,629 --> 00:15:23,380

Don't take Aer Lingus' name in vain.

00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:25,007

It's the sexiest airline.

00:15:25,007 --> 00:15:27,885

We gotta grab McYum Nuts

and get the "fook" out of here.

00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:30,095

Alright, you bog-brained Murphies,

00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:32,514

I shit all over your shamrocks.

00:15:32,514 --> 00:15:35,017

And Cillian Murphy can lick my balls!

00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:38,270

Oh! Ow!

00:15:43,484 --> 00:15:44,818

Ah!

00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:47,279

Oh! Ah!

00:15:51,992 --> 00:15:52,993

Ah!

00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:58,332

Ooh-wee!

00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:09,510

- You're good.

- Aye. I had a good teacher.

00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:11,679

- Oh, was it me?

- No, you fucking idiot!

00:16:11,679 --> 00:16:14,765

It was Sensei Sean

at the O'Punchies Karate dojo!

00:16:19,061 --> 00:16:21,438

Finish him, Korvo! Finish him!

00:16:22,022 --> 00:16:23,607

Papa? Please don't make me go.

00:16:23,607 --> 00:16:26,902

I have no choice. I'm not your papa.

I'm the team leader.

00:16:26,902 --> 00:16:28,779

And you have nutrients the Pupa needs.

00:16:28,779 --> 00:16:30,072

It's my duty and yours.

00:16:30,072 --> 00:16:34,660

You taught me a long time ago

to only care about meself.

00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,704

So that's what I'm gonna do.

00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:38,789

Ah, no!

00:16:40,457 --> 00:16:43,127

Oh, my God.

They fell in the ice! Where are they?

00:16:43,752 --> 00:16:46,088

RIP, Korvo and Yumyulack.

00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:48,882

So what should two fun single gals do

00:16:48,882 --> 00:16:51,218

in a town full of repressed

drunk European men?

00:16:51,218 --> 00:16:53,387

Ah! I got him! I...

00:16:53,387 --> 00:16:54,763

Wait, were you guys just gonna leave?

00:16:54,763 --> 00:16:56,098

You both went in the ice!

00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:59,018

In the movies, that means you're dead.

Do your own research.

00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,811

You didn't even wait five seconds.

00:17:00,811 --> 00:17:02,730

Well, it's cold out here. I'm sorry.

00:17:17,745 --> 00:17:20,372

So, yeah, The Edge was just

sitting there in the Dublin Airport.

00:17:20,372 --> 00:17:23,083

He was such a nice guy.

He even gave me one of his beanies.

00:17:23,083 --> 00:17:25,544

He said we could be Beanie Boys together

so we don't have to compete.

00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:28,505

Yep. No more competish,

so my whole thing's resolved.

00:17:28,505 --> 00:17:30,716

We should get this over with

before the Pupa gets any worse.

00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:32,384

This isn't over yet.

00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:33,761

Hey, what happened to your accent?

00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:36,305

It goes away if I don't watch

a Colin Farrell movie every day.

00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:38,223

McYumyulack, I just want to say I'm sorry.

00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:39,641

I didn't want it to be this way.

00:17:39,641 --> 00:17:40,809

If I could change the rules,

00:17:40,809 --> 00:17:42,770

I never would've murdered you

over and over again

00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:45,189

and fed you to the Pupa

like you were applesauce.

00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:46,774

Yeah, right. You're a narc!

00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:49,276

I'll pull your memories out

in case we ever repair the printer.

00:17:49,276 --> 00:17:52,488

How about you just admit

you're an asshole and let me go?

00:17:52,488 --> 00:17:54,782

Sorry. Timing just isn't right.

00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:55,866

Ah.

00:17:55,866 --> 00:17:57,326

- Stop!

- Ah! What?

00:17:57,326 --> 00:17:59,286

- Timing wasn't right.

- Get outta the way!

00:17:59,286 --> 00:18:00,871

When you let this McYum go,

00:18:00,871 --> 00:18:02,664

did you print out another one right away?

00:18:02,664 --> 00:18:05,084

- Yes, of course.

- And did you feed him to the Pupa?

00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:07,586

No. The nutrients don't come in

for a couple of weeks.

00:18:07,586 --> 00:18:08,670

But when you were waiting,

00:18:08,670 --> 00:18:12,007

the Pupa didn't shart

any terraforming goo.

00:18:12,007 --> 00:18:14,218

Wait. You're right. He didn't.

00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:16,178

A-ha! So what does that mean?

00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:19,306

It means he must have gotten his nutrients

from something else.

00:18:19,306 --> 00:18:22,434

Maybe the Pupa got fed

something to stay alive.

00:18:22,434 --> 00:18:25,104

That's impossible. We haven't been feeding

the Pupa any Earth food.

00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:26,897

You guys told me you were being good.

00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:28,440

Oopsies.

00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,150

You two fed him something, didn't you?

What was it?

00:18:30,150 --> 00:18:31,819

We totally ignored your rule.

00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:33,237

We fed him all sorts of stuff.

00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:34,738

We knew he was gonna get

all of his vitamins

00:18:34,738 --> 00:18:36,240

and minerals

from Yumyulack anyway,

00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,700

so it shouldn't even really matter

if we gave him a little extra.

00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:40,869

I explicitly said no human food.

00:18:40,869 --> 00:18:42,996

It was last year right before

we went to that other planet.

00:18:42,996 --> 00:18:45,332

- What did you feed him?

- It could have been McDonald's?

00:18:45,332 --> 00:18:46,792

Great. Let's go get some McDonald's.

00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:48,460

- Or Burger King?

- Okay.

00:18:48,460 --> 00:18:51,547

I don't like how much you ignored my rule,

but let's get that too.

00:18:51,547 --> 00:18:53,715

And Wendy's, Taco Bell,

Pizza Hut, Domino's...

00:18:53,715 --> 00:18:56,260

Wingstop, Papa John's,

KFC, Panda Express...

00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:58,637

But never any Long John Silvers!

00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:01,056

Yeah. We drew the line

at Long John Silvers.

00:19:01,056 --> 00:19:02,349

We're not monsters.

00:19:02,349 --> 00:19:03,892

We don't have time

to narrow all that down.

00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:05,310

The Pupa is dying.

00:19:05,310 --> 00:19:07,271

We need to feed him this Yumyulack

and then we'll figure it out.

00:19:07,271 --> 00:19:08,772

Well, I vote we narrow it down.

00:19:08,772 --> 00:19:10,357

Sorry, this is the only way.

00:19:12,442 --> 00:19:13,944

Cha Pupa.

00:19:13,944 --> 00:19:15,404

Wait. Did you hear that?

00:19:15,404 --> 00:19:16,613

Stop fucking stalling.

00:19:16,613 --> 00:19:18,073

I'm not! The Pupa speaks!

00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:20,284

Cha Pupa.

00:19:20,284 --> 00:19:22,744

So? He's been saying "cha Pupa" a bunch.

00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:24,204

It's super cute, but that won't help.

00:19:24,204 --> 00:19:26,915

What if he's trying to say "chalupa"?

00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:29,126

Oh!

00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,005

Can you believe it?

00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,214

The little guy was just trying to tell us

00:19:34,214 --> 00:19:35,674

what he needed the whole time.

00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:37,050

Classic Solar.

00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:38,927

Mm, yummy cha Pupa!

00:19:38,927 --> 00:19:40,846

Now that we can feed the Pupa chalupas,

00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,431

can we stop killing me every 90 days?

00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:45,601

Well, I hate changing my routine,

but in this case, I'll make an exception.

00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:49,271

Who knew chalupas would provide

the same vitamins as alien meat?

00:19:49,271 --> 00:19:51,899

Pupa is so full of nutrients.

He's evolving!

00:19:51,899 --> 00:19:55,068

Cha Pupa!

00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:57,237

Whoa! Will you look at that?

00:19:57,237 --> 00:20:00,782

He even turned a new color

just in time for the end of the season.

00:20:00,782 --> 00:20:02,201

And by that, I mean autumn.

00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:04,995

I'm just happy we ended the day

without any huge change.

00:20:04,995 --> 00:20:07,748

Unlike last year, when we had

to leave the planet

00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:08,916

and all that nonsense.

00:20:08,916 --> 00:20:10,500

That's right. We saved the Pupa,

00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:12,211

Yumyulack doesn't have to get harvested,

00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:13,879

and nothing bad came from it.

00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:16,173

A big win for the Solar Opposites!

00:20:16,173 --> 00:20:18,008

Terry, ring the bell!

00:20:22,554 --> 00:20:26,141

I can live! Chalupa, chalupa, chalupa!

00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:38,445

Yes, I am one step closer

to regaining control of the mission.

00:20:38,820 --> 00:20:42,074

Soon enough. Soon enough.

00:20:48,538 --> 00:20:50,582

Goddammit. How the fuck

am I gonna get down there?

00:00:09,259 --> 00:00:11,094

Oh, bless me, Father,

for I have sinned.

00:00:11,094 --> 00:00:12,721

I took the Lord's name in vain.

00:00:12,721 --> 00:00:13,972

I was covetous,

00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:16,349

and I put some Yoplait peach yogurt

in my butthole

00:00:16,349 --> 00:00:17,434

and let a cat lick it.

00:00:17,434 --> 00:00:19,060

[Yumyulack] Holy shit. Ew! A cat?

00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:20,145

You're gonna make me barf.

00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:21,730

Are you supposed to talk like that?

00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:23,273

I thought this was a safe space.

00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:24,858

[Yumyulack] Yeah.

For me to kick your ass!

00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,193

[yelps] What the hell, Father?

00:00:27,193 --> 00:00:28,987

You just got bounty-hunted, bitch!

00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:33,575

Respect.

00:00:35,493 --> 00:00:37,996

♪

00:00:38,621 --> 00:00:39,998

[grunts] I'm home.

00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:42,333

Nobody talk to me

until I get something to drink.

00:00:42,333 --> 00:00:43,918

I know I'm gonna regret asking this,

00:00:43,918 --> 00:00:45,670

but why are you dressed like the Pope?

00:00:45,670 --> 00:00:47,839

Oh, Terry, you ignorant slut.

00:00:47,839 --> 00:00:49,674

I have to lay low when I bounty hunt.

00:00:49,674 --> 00:00:50,967

This is my undercover gear.

00:00:50,967 --> 00:00:52,343

Well, I'm glad you had fun.

00:00:52,343 --> 00:00:54,679

All I did today was try

to suck my own mound.

00:00:54,679 --> 00:00:57,348

I present you the new Pupa.

00:00:57,849 --> 00:00:59,559

- Ah!

- Oh, my God!

00:00:59,559 --> 00:01:01,352

Why does he look like

a baby Pennywise?

00:01:01,352 --> 00:01:02,562

Cha Pupa!

00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:04,522

Aw! That's his cute new thing he says.

00:01:04,522 --> 00:01:05,982

Whoa, whoa, whoa. What is that?

00:01:05,982 --> 00:01:08,276

Glen Powell's specialty Kom-BRO-cha.

00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:09,986

I did a bunch of bounty hunting today,

00:01:09,986 --> 00:01:11,946

and it got me real thirsty for bacteria.

00:01:11,946 --> 00:01:13,073

- [bottle shatters]

- What the hell?

00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,949

No teenager wants to drink that shit.

00:01:14,949 --> 00:01:16,951

Wouldn't you rather smoke a fat J

00:01:16,951 --> 00:01:18,244

or huff some cumin?

00:01:18,244 --> 00:01:19,329

What are you talking about?

00:01:19,329 --> 00:01:22,582

The Kom-BRO-cha is marketed

specifically to idiots my age.

00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:26,419

Okay. The truth is kombucha

is poisonous to Shlorpians.

00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,129

But Jesse and Terry are drinking them!

00:01:28,129 --> 00:01:29,422

[gulping]

00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:32,217

- Mm. Doesn't matter how we taste.

- Jesse, no!

00:01:32,217 --> 00:01:34,969

Taste? What does that mean?

Why does how I taste matter?

00:01:34,969 --> 00:01:38,431

It matters because I need to kill you

and feed you to the Pupa.

00:01:38,431 --> 00:01:41,643

Korvo, no!

00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:44,979

[Korvo]

Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia,

00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:47,232

until the asteroid hit.

00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:50,235

One hundred adults and their replicants

were issued a Pupa

00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:52,237

and escaped into the... space,

00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:54,697

searching for new homes

on uninhabited worlds.

00:01:54,697 --> 00:01:55,990

We crashed on Earth,

00:01:55,990 --> 00:01:58,243

{\an8}stranding us on an already

overpopulated planet.

00:01:58,243 --> 00:01:59,869

{\an8}That's right, I've been talking

this whole time.

00:01:59,869 --> 00:02:01,079

{\an8}I'm the one holding the Pupa.

00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:02,789

{\an8}My name is Korvo. This is my show.

00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,124

{\an8}Bollocks, I just dropped the Pupa.

00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:06,167

{\an8}Ugh. This is ridiculous. I hate Earth.

00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:07,252

{\an8}It's a horrible home.

00:02:07,252 --> 00:02:08,962

{\an8}People are stupid and confusing.

00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:11,047

{\an8}Why can't I pump my own gas

in New Jersey?

00:02:11,047 --> 00:02:13,049

{\an8}It's the only Earth activity

that calms me down.

00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:15,135

{\an8}I wish the entire atmosphere was fumes.

00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,178

{\an8}All the good planets let you breathe oil.

00:02:17,178 --> 00:02:20,390

[♪ dramatic music playing]

00:02:23,059 --> 00:02:26,020

No!

00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:28,189

What's happening here?

What the hell was that?

00:02:28,189 --> 00:02:30,650

{\an8}The ray that makes you sit on the couch

to hear some hard news.

00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:32,026

{\an8}I thought you were gonna kill me.

00:02:32,026 --> 00:02:34,070

{\an8}- I would never do that.

- Okay, good.

00:02:34,070 --> 00:02:36,030

Wait. No, I do do it regularly.

00:02:36,030 --> 00:02:38,366

But first I'm going

to explain why I do it.

00:02:38,366 --> 00:02:39,534

Because you respect me.

00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:41,494

{\an8}No, because confusion

can make your skin taste

00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:42,662

{\an8}like the bottom of a flip-flop.

00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:44,873

Every three months,

a very special thing happens.

00:02:44,873 --> 00:02:46,791

I murder you,

blend your body into mush,

00:02:46,791 --> 00:02:47,917

and feed you to the Pupa.

00:02:47,917 --> 00:02:50,044

- No, you don't!

- Oh, yes, I do.

00:02:50,044 --> 00:02:53,590

See, the Pupa needs to be fed your meat

every 90 days or he dies.

00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:56,676

I've lived here just as long as you

and that's literally never happened.

00:02:56,676 --> 00:02:58,678

Yes, it has. You just don't remember

00:02:58,678 --> 00:03:01,181

because we upload your consciousness

to the ship's hard drive

00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,892

and transfer your memories

to a new brain before I bap you.

00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:06,895

But we leave out the murder memory

so you don't get all pissy.

00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:08,813

Okay, fine. Then why am I here?

00:03:08,813 --> 00:03:10,940

{\an8}Allow me to show and tell you.

00:03:10,940 --> 00:03:12,025

{\an8}Cha Pupa!

00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:13,818

Huh. That really is cute.

00:03:13,818 --> 00:03:15,945

AISHA, where did I put

that instructional geode

00:03:15,945 --> 00:03:17,030

{\an8}that came with the Pupa?

00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:19,532

{\an8}[AISHA] Don't ask me.

I'm not Mary friggin' Poppins.

00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:20,992

{\an8}Oh, nice. We actually kept it.

00:03:20,992 --> 00:03:23,203

{\an8}The Pupa Owner's Manual, Quartz Edition

00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,246

{\an8}[computer whirring, beeping]

00:03:26,789 --> 00:03:28,666

[electronic voice] Caution.

Failing to feed your Pupa

00:03:28,666 --> 00:03:30,710

replicant meat will result in death.

00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:33,963

Proper care of your Pupa

will ensure it evolves

00:03:33,963 --> 00:03:35,840

and terraforms your new world.

00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:38,676

You could feed your Pupa choice cuts

of the nutrient replicant

00:03:38,676 --> 00:03:40,887

or just blend and serve whole.

00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:42,972

- [Terry] Oh, that's what we do.

- [Korvo] Shh!

00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:44,307

{\an8}Hello, replicant.

00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:46,392

{\an8}Have you had a fulfilling day

of bounty hunting?

00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:48,144

{\an8}Yes, team leader. I sure have.

00:03:48,144 --> 00:03:49,562

{\an8}[team leader laughs]

00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:51,773

{\an8}- [crystal slurping]

- [replicant groans]

00:03:52,148 --> 00:03:54,025

{\an8}- What an idiot.

- I hate this.

00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:55,568

{\an8}[electronic voice]

The team leader now processes

00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,862

{\an8}the replicant's proteins

in the painless method

00:03:57,862 --> 00:04:00,615

{\an8}devised by our Shlorpian doctors.

00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:01,783

{\an8}[replicant screaming]

00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,660

{\an8}That doesn't seem painless.

00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:06,579

{\an8}He means for the team leader.

He's not in any pain.

00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:10,667

[noisy munching]

00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,877

[Jesse] Aw, look at him go.

00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:16,547

And now I upload the memories,

minus just a few.

00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:21,970

[electronic voice] In a few weeks,

the new body will begin

00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:25,348

to produce nutrients,

and the cycle will begin again.

00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:27,725

Under no circumstances should this video

be shown to your nutrient replicant.

00:04:27,725 --> 00:04:29,352

This is freaking me out!

00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:31,980

{\an8}Don't worry. Being freaked doesn't affect

the flavor of your flesh.

00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:34,023

Ugh! Stop talking about my flesh!

00:04:34,023 --> 00:04:36,693

So you guys just kill me

and Jesse whenever you want?

00:04:36,693 --> 00:04:39,195

No. Not me. Just you.

00:04:39,195 --> 00:04:40,488

Why just me?

00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:42,240

{\an8}We all have mission jobs.

00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:44,617

{\an8}I'm the chronicler,

Terry cares for the Pupa,

00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:45,785

{\an8}Korvo's team leader.

00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,704

{\an8}And you're the nutrient replicant.

00:04:47,704 --> 00:04:50,999

{\an8}I'm the bounty hunter.

I literally bounty-hunted this morning.

00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:52,917

{\an8}This isn't Star Wars, bro.

00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:54,711

{\an8}That's something

the Shlorpian elders made up

00:04:54,711 --> 00:04:57,588

{\an8}so you wouldn't question your actual role

as a delicious treat.

00:04:57,588 --> 00:04:59,841

{\an8}But I've seen the Pupa eat

all sorts of fast food and junk.

00:04:59,841 --> 00:05:01,801

{\an8}- Just let him eat that.

- No, it's empty calories.

00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:04,304

{\an8}Terry and Jesse promised

they'd stop feeding him that stuff.

00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,388

{\an8}We've been good.

00:05:05,388 --> 00:05:08,433

{\an8}- Yeah, we just say, "No way, Jose."

- Cha Pupa!

00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:12,061

Being the nutrient replicant is

the highest honor a Shlorpian can have.

00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:14,439

Your job is the most important

out of all of us.

00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:17,400

[Yumyulack] Oh, man.

He is looking pretty hungry.

00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,737

Poor little guy.

Okay, screw it. I'm in.

00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:22,613

Plus you'll save

my memories anyway, right?

00:05:22,613 --> 00:05:24,657

Yep. And after, you won't even remember.

00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:25,950

We'll be back to normal.

00:05:25,950 --> 00:05:29,203

Do you mind if this one time

I do it myself?

00:05:29,203 --> 00:05:31,414

Sure. How do you wanna do it?

Sword? Flamethrower?

00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:33,916

That thing where you rub your mound

while hanging yourself in the closet?

00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:35,376

Just a simple ray will do.

00:05:35,376 --> 00:05:39,005

Here you go. Let me just grab the crystal

that sucks your memories out. Ah!

00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:41,883

Anyone comes at me with the crystal,

I'll blow your fucking head off!

00:05:41,883 --> 00:05:43,217

Cha Pupa?

00:05:43,217 --> 00:05:44,886

- Ah!

- Stay back.

00:05:44,886 --> 00:05:46,679

It's not as bad as it sounds.

00:05:46,679 --> 00:05:48,264

We just print out another you.

00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:50,892

We can take all these memories away too.

You won't be sad at all.

00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:52,977

Oh, you're right about that.

I won't be sad.

00:05:52,977 --> 00:05:55,605

Because I'm blasting the Me Machine.

00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:57,982

Put that ray gun down

and kill yourself right now, mister!

00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:00,151

[both grunting]

00:06:01,652 --> 00:06:02,653

- [explosion booms]

- [Yumyulack screams]

00:06:03,654 --> 00:06:05,740

No!

00:06:06,282 --> 00:06:07,700

He ruined my shirt!

00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:12,580

The Pupa's gonna starve

without his Yum meat.

00:06:12,580 --> 00:06:13,998

The mission's doomed.

00:06:13,998 --> 00:06:15,958

We're all gonna die,

and I never even got to tour

00:06:15,958 --> 00:06:17,794

the Burlington Coat Factory factory!

00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:20,463

Everyone chill the fuck out.

Uh, let me workshop this.

00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:22,382

Pupa, eat this. It's good for you.

00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,883

- Cha Pupa.

- [stomach growls]

00:06:23,883 --> 00:06:26,260

- It's all gross and burnt up.

- He needs to eat it to live.

00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:28,763

What if we feed the little guy

something else from the home world?

00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:31,724

{\an8}Yes! I purposely hid some

Shlorpian powdered calorie chunks

00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:33,101

{\an8}in the emergency rations kit.

00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:35,436

'Cause that's what I do.

I think ahead, baby.

00:06:35,436 --> 00:06:38,564

Oh, shit. I ate the chunks last year

when we ran out of snacks.

00:06:38,564 --> 00:06:39,982

Those were for emergencies!

00:06:39,982 --> 00:06:41,692

It was an emergency.

00:06:41,692 --> 00:06:44,112

I had to binge all of

Shadow and Bone season two

00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,446

so I could spoil it on Discord

00:06:45,446 --> 00:06:47,573

before my Discord dudes

could spoil it for me.

00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:49,951

- Here. Lick the wrappers.

- No. Cha Pupa.

00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:51,035

You two stay down here

00:06:51,035 --> 00:06:52,662

and try to get the Pupa

to lick that wrapper

00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:55,039

while I go work on fixing

the Yumyulack printer.

00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:58,584

[AISHA] Are you sure that

makeup glue's strong enough?

00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:00,753

This is drag brunch grade

eyelash adhesive

00:07:00,753 --> 00:07:02,880

I got from Terry's vanity. It'll work.

00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:04,841

[AISHA] You ever think about

what your drag name would be?

00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:06,342

Mine's Nefertitties

00:07:06,342 --> 00:07:08,302

'cause I would have some big old titties.

00:07:08,302 --> 00:07:09,762

Oh, that is good.

00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:11,180

Alright, let's see if this thing works.

00:07:11,180 --> 00:07:13,891

[machine beeps, whirs]

00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,979

Ugh, this doesn't look right.

Scan this thing for nutrients.

00:07:17,979 --> 00:07:20,273

[AISHA] Scanning.

That thing is all jacked up.

00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,858

The Pupa won't get anything from that.

00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:23,443

Damn it. And the printer's shot.

00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:24,735

We'll have to try something else.

00:07:24,735 --> 00:07:26,237

- [AISHA] Is it expanding?

- Oh!

00:07:26,237 --> 00:07:28,489

Oh, shit. The growth particles

are out of control.

00:07:28,489 --> 00:07:30,741

AISHA, open the hatch.

We have to get it off the ship.

00:07:30,741 --> 00:07:33,453

Oh, crap, crap. Shitty, shitty, crap.

00:07:36,247 --> 00:07:37,707

[AISHA]

Are you gonna just leave it there?

00:07:37,707 --> 00:07:40,084

I'll call heavy item pickup.

They'll get it on Tuesday.

00:07:40,084 --> 00:07:42,336

[AISHA] The city is not going like that.

00:07:42,336 --> 00:07:44,589

Oh, come on. Just a wittle-bitty taste.

00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:46,674

- Mm, yummy.

- No!

00:07:46,674 --> 00:07:50,470

Terry, look. I got Yum's

Old Spice Swagger deodorant!

00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,555

This has to be loaded with Yum germs.

00:07:52,555 --> 00:07:55,892

Oh, yeah! Here you go, Pupes.

It's gym bag flavored.

00:07:56,184 --> 00:07:57,935

- [Pupa barfs]

- [stomach growls]

00:07:57,935 --> 00:07:59,187

Are you okay, little guy?

00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:01,564

- Oh, cha Pupa...

- [stomach growling]

00:08:03,191 --> 00:08:04,317

Ah!

00:08:05,610 --> 00:08:07,695

He just sharted a side table?

00:08:07,695 --> 00:08:10,448

Oh, no. This looks like it came

from my apartment on the home world.

00:08:10,448 --> 00:08:12,867

Your Pupa just sharted it out

with some orange goo.

00:08:12,867 --> 00:08:15,536

- Excuse me? My Pupa.

- You heard me.

00:08:15,536 --> 00:08:16,829

[goo splatters]

00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:20,333

The Pupa is prematurely

squirting out terraforming fluids

00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,793

because his body's malnourished

without his nutrients.

00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:23,961

Well, that blows.

00:08:23,961 --> 00:08:25,713

Why does it all look like Shlorpian stuff?

00:08:25,713 --> 00:08:27,381

Because he has everything

from the home world

00:08:27,381 --> 00:08:28,716

coded into his DNA.

00:08:28,716 --> 00:08:29,884

Isn't this a good thing?

00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:32,136

Don't we want the Pupa to terraform?

00:08:32,136 --> 00:08:33,971

This isn't a controlled terraformation.

00:08:33,971 --> 00:08:35,306

The Pupa's body is breaking down.

00:08:35,306 --> 00:08:37,225

This is a destructive

and uncontrollable process

00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:38,351

that will ruin this planet.

00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:39,936

If the Pupa doesn't get nutrients soon,

00:08:39,936 --> 00:08:41,437

his sharting will get worse.

00:08:41,437 --> 00:08:43,523

He'll die and so will our chances

00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:45,107

of rebuilding the home world.

00:08:45,107 --> 00:08:46,734

Pupa already has a taste for flesh,

00:08:46,734 --> 00:08:48,819

so let's just find a human

similar to Yumyulack

00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:49,946

and feed them to him.

00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:51,280

Yes, that could work,

00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:53,407

but it would have to be

a real pathetic, ugly loser

00:08:53,407 --> 00:08:54,617

just like Yumyulack.

00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:57,328

Uh, are you seeing

this floating Yumyulack head out there?

00:08:57,328 --> 00:08:59,455

What? Don't worry about that.

Who knows where that came from?

00:08:59,455 --> 00:09:01,666

The Solar Opposites have to find

00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:05,294

a petty bounty hunting-type human

who smells like a foot.

00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:09,048

- Next.

- [Terry] Hello, neighbor Kevin.

00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:11,968

You will be reading

for the part of Yumyulack.

00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:14,512

This is so cool.

Always wanted to be an actor.

00:09:14,512 --> 00:09:16,806

You know, back in the day,

I made some docking videos

00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:19,600

on YouTube before the algorithm

demonetized foreskin.

00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:21,686

- Next.

- Hi, I'm Sean Giambrone.

00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:23,229

I used to be on ABC's The Goldbergs.

00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:24,939

- Next!

- Thank you for inviting me.

00:09:24,939 --> 00:09:26,440

I have many special skills.

00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:29,068

I am a pre-certified Poker Face who--

00:09:29,068 --> 00:09:31,279

- Ow! Shit! Fuck!

- [Jesse] Principal Cooke,

00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:33,406

always fun to see you out

in the real world.

00:09:33,406 --> 00:09:34,657

Okay, so for the audition,

00:09:34,657 --> 00:09:36,325

we're workshopping a scene from Dune.

00:09:36,325 --> 00:09:37,618

Put your foot in that box.

00:09:41,622 --> 00:09:44,542

Uh, oh, I feel something licking me.

00:09:44,542 --> 00:09:47,420

When the fear of being licked is gone,

only you will remain.

00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:50,172

- [crunching]

- Ow! Now it's biting me. I knew it!

00:09:50,172 --> 00:09:52,258

These sicko internet perverts

just want pics

00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:55,469

of your bloody feet,

and they aren't gonna pay for them!

00:09:55,469 --> 00:09:57,013

Bye, Principal Cooke.

00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:59,015

Uh, cha Pupa.

00:09:59,015 --> 00:10:01,017

Goddammit, Pupa.

We're trying to help you, you little shit.

00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:02,393

[Pupa retches]

00:10:04,812 --> 00:10:06,480

That's my bank from the home world.

00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:08,774

It had terrible operating hours. Run!

00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:10,651

[all yell]

00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:12,653

[Pupa coughs]

00:10:12,653 --> 00:10:14,697

Well, my friends and lover,

we're out of moves.

00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,782

The Yumyulack-making machine

can't be fixed.

00:10:16,782 --> 00:10:17,867

The Pupa won't eat.

00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:20,578

There's a big-ass Yumyulack head

floating over Denver.

00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:22,496

- Fuck Denver!

- I fear, for once,

00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:24,707

we can't sci-fi our way out of this.

00:10:24,707 --> 00:10:26,917

Poor Pupa. I'm so sorry.

00:10:26,917 --> 00:10:28,002

[Pupa retches]

00:10:28,794 --> 00:10:30,921

[AISHA] Come on, Korvo.

Don't be a little bitch.

00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:32,465

- Just tell them.

- AISHA, no.

00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:34,592

What? What shouldn't you be

a little bitch about?

00:10:34,592 --> 00:10:35,968

[AISHA] You gotta tell them.

00:10:35,968 --> 00:10:39,930

I can't. It's a moment of weakness

I've held for so long. Ugh.

00:10:39,930 --> 00:10:43,142

What I'm about to reveal

may shake you to your very cores.

00:10:43,142 --> 00:10:45,061

It may destroy the foundation on which

00:10:45,061 --> 00:10:47,021

- our relationship has been--

- Just tell us!

00:10:47,021 --> 00:10:50,232

There is... another Yumyulack.

00:10:50,232 --> 00:10:51,734

[Terry and Jesse gasp]

00:10:54,737 --> 00:10:57,365

Gasping so hard at that revelation

got me so hungry!

00:10:57,365 --> 00:10:59,367

Why are Jersey Mike's sammies so good?

00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,952

They get their oil and vinegar

straight from the New Jersey Turnpike.

00:11:01,952 --> 00:11:03,037

Hey, what did you mean

00:11:03,037 --> 00:11:05,247

that one time you said

there's another Yumyulack?

00:11:05,247 --> 00:11:06,874

Hmm. Well, one time,

I didn't kill Yumyulack

00:11:06,874 --> 00:11:08,501

and feed him to the Pupa.

I let him escape.

00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:10,670

I-I-I don't really remember the details.

00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:13,464

- It's a bit of a haze.

- [AISHA] We good. I got that shit on tape.

00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:16,342

No! No, no. We don't have

to watch the tape. That's not important.

00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,427

[AISHA] I put in a Ring camera

after someone kept stealing

00:11:18,427 --> 00:11:20,262

my porcelain frogs, Terry!

00:11:20,262 --> 00:11:21,347

Check it out.

00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:24,558

- Ah!

- What are you doing?

00:11:24,558 --> 00:11:26,602

Please, don't stab me.

00:11:26,602 --> 00:11:27,687

No, I-I wasn't.

00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,313

I was gonna suck out your memories

and then kill you.

00:11:29,313 --> 00:11:32,817

No, but please.

Papa, don't do that either.

00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:34,026

Papa?

00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:35,986

- Ah.

- [crystal slurping]

00:11:35,986 --> 00:11:37,655

- Go.

- You're not gonna kill me?

00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:38,864

I've got a copy of your memories.

00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:40,658

Now go before I change my mind.

00:11:41,075 --> 00:11:42,159

Damn you, AISHA.

00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:45,204

He called me Papa.

No Yumyulack has ever said that.

00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:48,124

He was so sweet. Not like all

the other dipshit Yumyulacks.

00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:51,961

Oh, Korvo. I thought I was

the only one with daddy issues.

00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:54,922

I've been trying to develop them

as a Cesar Chavez Day present to you.

00:11:54,922 --> 00:11:56,257

But I guess it worked too well.

00:11:56,257 --> 00:11:59,051

Oh, my God. Stop being such a pushover!

00:11:59,051 --> 00:12:02,847

You're team leader, man.

Pull yourself together!

00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:05,224

Your Pupa is getting gray

and blasting goo.

00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:08,102

We've gotta find that Yumyulack.

When did you let him go?

00:12:08,102 --> 00:12:10,187

It was back when I was really

into eating stews,

00:12:10,187 --> 00:12:13,149

so I got the idea to send him

to live a peaceful existence in Ireland.

00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:16,068

Plus, I knew Terry would never go there

due to his feud with The Edge.

00:12:16,068 --> 00:12:18,571

Well, that goateed,

beanie-wearing bitch stole my look!

00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:19,905

[spurting]

00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:24,577

Fresh konixberries for sa...

00:12:25,035 --> 00:12:26,120

Where am I?

00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:27,997

Cha Pupa.

00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:29,331

[vendor and stand explode]

00:12:29,331 --> 00:12:30,499

We're running out of time!

00:12:30,499 --> 00:12:32,376

AISHA, watch the Pupa

and see if you can get

00:12:32,376 --> 00:12:34,128

the Yumyulack-making machine

working again.

00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:35,463

[AISHA] I was about to go on break.

00:12:35,463 --> 00:12:37,381

You'll get OT. We'll fly to Ireland,

00:12:37,381 --> 00:12:39,175

grab that tender-ass Yumyulack,

bring him back,

00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:40,843

and feed the Pupa before it's too late.

00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:42,303

You know,

I-I-I'm just telling you right now,

00:12:42,303 --> 00:12:44,555

if I see The Edge, I'm not gonna walk on.

00:12:44,555 --> 00:12:46,807

I'm gonna slap that goatee

right off his face.

00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:49,101

It's not gonna be a beautiful day for him.

00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:51,771

♪

00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:57,067

[♪ Celtic violin music playing]

00:12:57,902 --> 00:12:59,487

This place looks hella quaint.

00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:02,114

Wait, is that The Edge

playing the fiddle in the corner?

00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:05,576

Terry, that's a lady and she's, like, 90.

00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:07,953

Hello. Name's Seamus O'Drinky.

00:13:07,953 --> 00:13:10,164

This is me family's Irish pub.

00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:12,792

We're looking for a sweet

wannabe fuckboy. Ye high.

00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,084

Might go by the name Yumyulack

00:13:14,084 --> 00:13:15,544

or Grand Muff Tarkin,

00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:16,837

his Xbox name.

00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:18,464

Sorry. Can't help you.

00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:21,842

I'd remember if a funny-looking fella

like that came in here.

00:13:21,842 --> 00:13:25,554

- Thanks for your time.

- I'm watching you, fiddle slut.

00:13:31,685 --> 00:13:33,854

McYumyulack, it's Seamus.

00:13:33,854 --> 00:13:38,025

Seems your Pa's finally come to town.

00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:41,612

Look, you know only one dirty-ass hoe

00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:44,865

{\an8}would need that much

X-Treme Sour Gooseberry Rockstars.

00:13:44,865 --> 00:13:46,242

That son of a bitch The Edge.

00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:48,160

Oh, my God. It's Yumyulack.

00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,287

Jesus, Terry. Get over it.

00:13:53,082 --> 00:13:55,793

This must be his place. Look at the name.

00:13:55,793 --> 00:13:57,962

[Terry] Classy. Hey, there he is!

00:13:58,796 --> 00:14:01,841

Oh, this is gonna be easy peasy,

Dan Cortese.

00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:03,634

I'm excited to see Yumyulack,

00:14:03,634 --> 00:14:05,761

even if it is a low-rent Irish version.

00:14:05,761 --> 00:14:08,472

Don't bring emotion into this.

He's just Pupa food.

00:14:08,472 --> 00:14:11,100

Ah, stupid wire.

Someone could trip on this.

00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:13,894

I'm gonna kick it in three, a-two, and...

00:14:13,894 --> 00:14:16,355

- Terry, don't!

- [explosion booms]

00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:21,193

[Irish accent] You arseholes

aren't taking me back. Get fucked!

00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:22,862

That Yumyulack's not sweet or tender.

00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,655

And he talks all Irishy now?

00:14:24,655 --> 00:14:26,991

He played me, calling me Papa.

00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:29,618

We gotta take this bitch down now.

00:14:30,327 --> 00:14:31,662

Oh, hell, yeah. Another wire.

00:14:31,662 --> 00:14:32,997

[Korvo] Terry, would you just leave it?

00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:34,248

Fine.

00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:37,918

Yumyulack?

00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:41,589

We just came to say hi

and see how things are going.

00:14:41,589 --> 00:14:44,967

Bull shite! And I go by McYumyulack now.

00:14:44,967 --> 00:14:46,760

That's me Irish name.

00:14:46,760 --> 00:14:48,053

I really like that for him.

00:14:48,053 --> 00:14:50,431

For years, I've waited

and planned for this day.

00:14:50,431 --> 00:14:53,392

Booby-trapped the whole house,

so don't come any closer

00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:55,477

or I'll blow yas to hell.

00:14:55,477 --> 00:14:57,479

I know we hate on the guy

for being such a dick,

00:14:57,479 --> 00:14:59,899

but he's really made

a life for himself here.

00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:03,068

Yeah. Maybe we should peace out

and just let him be Irish in peace. Peace!

00:15:03,068 --> 00:15:06,196

No! We need to get him to the house,

chop him up, and feed him to the Pupa

00:15:06,196 --> 00:15:08,908

or there won't be a planet

for Ireland to be the crown jewel of.

00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:10,576

I heard that!

00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:12,161

[explosions boom]

00:15:13,078 --> 00:15:16,290

Leave our lad alone or we'll burn you up

and bury you in the peat!

00:15:16,290 --> 00:15:19,335

Damn it. All our sci-fi weapons

got confiscated at the airport.

00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:21,629

Aer Lingus, more like ass dingus.

00:15:21,629 --> 00:15:23,380

Don't take Aer Lingus' name in vain.

00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:25,007

It's the sexiest airline.

00:15:25,007 --> 00:15:27,885

We gotta grab McYum Nuts

and get the "fook" out of here.

00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:30,095

Alright, you bog-brained Murphies,

00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:32,514

I shit all over your shamrocks.

00:15:32,514 --> 00:15:35,017

And Cillian Murphy can lick my balls!

00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:38,270

Oh! Ow!

00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:40,397

[♪ dramatic music playing]

00:15:43,484 --> 00:15:44,818

Ah!

00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:47,279

Oh! Ah!

00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:49,531

[McYumyulack panting]

00:15:51,992 --> 00:15:52,993

Ah!

00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:58,332

Ooh-wee!

00:16:01,585 --> 00:16:04,797

[both grunting]

00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:09,510

- You're good.

- Aye. I had a good teacher.

00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:11,679

- Oh, was it me?

- No, you fucking idiot!

00:16:11,679 --> 00:16:14,765

It was Sensei Sean

at the O'Punchies Karate dojo!

00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:18,102

[both grunting]

00:16:19,061 --> 00:16:21,438

Finish him, Korvo! Finish him!

00:16:22,022 --> 00:16:23,607

Papa? Please don't make me go.

00:16:23,607 --> 00:16:26,902

I have no choice. I'm not your papa.

I'm the team leader.

00:16:26,902 --> 00:16:28,779

And you have nutrients the Pupa needs.

00:16:28,779 --> 00:16:30,072

It's my duty and yours.

00:16:30,072 --> 00:16:34,660

You taught me a long time ago

to only care about meself.

00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,704

- So that's what I'm gonna do.

- [ice cracks]

00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:38,789

- [splashing]

- Ah, no!

00:16:40,457 --> 00:16:43,127

Oh, my God.

They fell in the ice! Where are they?

00:16:43,752 --> 00:16:46,088

RIP, Korvo and Yumyulack.

00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:48,882

So what should two fun single gals do

00:16:48,882 --> 00:16:51,218

in a town full of repressed

drunk European men?

00:16:51,218 --> 00:16:53,387

Ah! I got him! I...

00:16:53,387 --> 00:16:54,763

Wait, were you guys just gonna leave?

00:16:54,763 --> 00:16:56,098

You both went in the ice!

00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:59,018

In the movies, that means you're dead.

Do your own research.

00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,811

[Korvo]

You didn't even wait five seconds.

00:17:00,811 --> 00:17:02,730

Well, it's cold out here. I'm sorry.

00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:08,861

[people screaming]

00:17:15,784 --> 00:17:17,745

[liquid splatters]

00:17:17,745 --> 00:17:20,372

So, yeah, The Edge was just

sitting there in the Dublin Airport.

00:17:20,372 --> 00:17:23,083

He was such a nice guy.

He even gave me one of his beanies.

00:17:23,083 --> 00:17:25,544

He said we could be Beanie Boys together

so we don't have to compete.

00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:28,505

Yep. No more competish,

so my whole thing's resolved.

00:17:28,505 --> 00:17:30,716

We should get this over with

before the Pupa gets any worse.

00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:32,384

[normal voice]

This isn't over yet.

00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:33,761

Hey, what happened to your accent?

00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:36,305

It goes away if I don't watch

a Colin Farrell movie every day.

00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:38,223

McYumyulack, I just want to say I'm sorry.

00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:39,641

I didn't want it to be this way.

00:17:39,641 --> 00:17:40,809

If I could change the rules,

00:17:40,809 --> 00:17:42,770

I never would've murdered you

over and over again

00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:45,189

and fed you to the Pupa

like you were applesauce.

00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:46,774

Yeah, right. You're a narc!

00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:49,276

I'll pull your memories out

in case we ever repair the printer.

00:17:49,276 --> 00:17:52,488

How about you just admit

you're an asshole and let me go?

00:17:52,488 --> 00:17:54,782

Sorry. Timing just isn't right.

00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:55,866

Ah.

00:17:55,866 --> 00:17:57,326

- Stop!

- Ah! What?

00:17:57,326 --> 00:17:59,286

- Timing wasn't right.

- Get outta the way!

00:17:59,286 --> 00:18:00,871

When you let this McYum go,

00:18:00,871 --> 00:18:02,664

did you print out another one right away?

00:18:02,664 --> 00:18:05,084

- Yes, of course.

- And did you feed him to the Pupa?

00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:07,586

No. The nutrients don't come in

for a couple of weeks.

00:18:07,586 --> 00:18:08,670

But when you were waiting,

00:18:08,670 --> 00:18:12,007

the Pupa didn't shart

any terraforming goo.

00:18:12,007 --> 00:18:14,218

[gasps] Wait. You're right. He didn't.

00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:16,178

A-ha! So what does that mean?

00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:19,306

It means he must have gotten his nutrients

from something else.

00:18:19,306 --> 00:18:22,434

Maybe the Pupa got fed

something to stay alive.

00:18:22,434 --> 00:18:25,104

That's impossible. We haven't been feeding

the Pupa any Earth food.

00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:26,897

You guys told me you were being good.

00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:28,440

Oopsies.

00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,150

You two fed him something, didn't you?

What was it?

00:18:30,150 --> 00:18:31,819

We totally ignored your rule.

00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:33,237

We fed him all sorts of stuff.

00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:34,738

We knew he was gonna get

all of his vitamins

00:18:34,738 --> 00:18:36,240

and minerals

from Yumyulack anyway,

00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,700

so it shouldn't even really matter

if we gave him a little extra.

00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:40,869

I explicitly said no human food.

00:18:40,869 --> 00:18:42,996

It was last year right before

we went to that other planet.

00:18:42,996 --> 00:18:45,332

- What did you feed him?

- It could have been McDonald's?

00:18:45,332 --> 00:18:46,792

Great. Let's go get some McDonald's.

00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:48,460

- Or Burger King?

- Okay.

00:18:48,460 --> 00:18:51,547

I don't like how much you ignored my rule,

but let's get that too.

00:18:51,547 --> 00:18:53,715

And Wendy's, Taco Bell,

Pizza Hut, Domino's...

00:18:53,715 --> 00:18:56,260

Wingstop, Papa John's,

KFC, Panda Express...

00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:58,637

But never any Long John Silvers!

00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:01,056

Yeah. We drew the line

at Long John Silvers.

00:19:01,056 --> 00:19:02,349

We're not monsters.

00:19:02,349 --> 00:19:03,892

We don't have time

to narrow all that down.

00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:05,310

The Pupa is dying.

00:19:05,310 --> 00:19:07,271

We need to feed him this Yumyulack

and then we'll figure it out.

00:19:07,271 --> 00:19:08,772

Well, I vote we narrow it down.

00:19:08,772 --> 00:19:10,357

Sorry, this is the only way.

00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:12,442

- [crystal slurping]

- [Yumyulack groaning]

00:19:12,442 --> 00:19:13,944

[Pupa] Cha Pupa.

00:19:13,944 --> 00:19:15,404

Wait. Did you hear that?

00:19:15,404 --> 00:19:16,613

Stop fucking stalling.

00:19:16,613 --> 00:19:18,073

I'm not! The Pupa speaks!

00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:20,284

Cha Pupa.

00:19:20,284 --> 00:19:22,744

So? He's been saying "cha Pupa" a bunch.

00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:24,204

It's super cute, but that won't help.

00:19:24,204 --> 00:19:26,915

What if he's trying to say "chalupa"?

00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:29,126

[Terry/Korvo/Jesse]

Oh!

00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,005

[Terry] Can you believe it?

00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,214

The little guy was just trying to tell us

00:19:34,214 --> 00:19:35,674

what he needed the whole time.

00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:37,050

Classic Solar.

00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:38,927

Mm, yummy cha Pupa!

00:19:38,927 --> 00:19:40,846

Now that we can feed the Pupa chalupas,

00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,431

can we stop killing me every 90 days?

00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:45,601

Well, I hate changing my routine,

but in this case, I'll make an exception.

00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:49,271

Who knew chalupas would provide

the same vitamins as alien meat?

00:19:49,271 --> 00:19:51,899

Pupa is so full of nutrients.

He's evolving!

00:19:51,899 --> 00:19:55,068

Cha Pupa!

00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:57,237

Whoa! Will you look at that?

00:19:57,237 --> 00:20:00,782

He even turned a new color

just in time for the end of the season.

00:20:00,782 --> 00:20:02,201

And by that, I mean autumn.

00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:04,995

I'm just happy we ended the day

without any huge change.

00:20:04,995 --> 00:20:07,748

Unlike last year, when we had

to leave the planet

00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:08,916

and all that nonsense.

00:20:08,916 --> 00:20:10,500

That's right. We saved the Pupa,

00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:12,211

Yumyulack doesn't have to get harvested,

00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:13,879

and nothing bad came from it.

00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:16,173

A big win for the Solar Opposites!

00:20:16,173 --> 00:20:18,008

Terry, ring the bell!

00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:21,845

- [bell ringing]

- [all cheering]

00:20:22,554 --> 00:20:26,141

I can live! Chalupa, chalupa, chalupa!

00:20:26,141 --> 00:20:28,810

[♪ ominous music playing]

00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:38,445

Yes, I am one step closer

to regaining control of the mission.

00:20:38,820 --> 00:20:42,074

Soon enough. Soon enough.

00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:44,910

[maniacal laughter]

00:20:48,538 --> 00:20:50,582

Goddammit. How the fuck

am I gonna get down there?

00:20:50,582 --> 00:20:53,669

[♪ dramatic theme playing]

00:21:35,043 --> 00:21:36,545

[mimicking laser fire]