Охота за коричневым октябрём

00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:18,180

В «Люксовых елях» есть всё: спа с солёной водой,

чай по 15 долларов и гольф обычного размера.

00:00:18,190 --> 00:00:20,250

Не знал, что они бывают без мельниц.

00:00:20,260 --> 00:00:22,730

Это просто поле травы. У нас такое дома есть.

00:00:22,740 --> 00:00:25,900

Костный мозг из крана и устричный бар?

00:00:25,910 --> 00:00:28,570

В «Люксовых Елях» хоть чего-то нет?

00:00:28,580 --> 00:00:30,190

Разнообразия жанров.

00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:33,490

Поэтому я возглавляю

комитет сай-фай-разнообразия.

00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:37,570

У нас куча богатых людей

и всего парочка богатых пришельцев.

00:00:37,580 --> 00:00:39,820

Ваша семья отлично здесь впишется.

00:00:39,830 --> 00:00:43,560

Стоп, я согласен быть коллекционным пришельцем

только на концерте Phish.

00:00:43,570 --> 00:00:47,460

О, всё вовсе не так.

У нас уже есть несколько сай-фай членов.

00:00:47,470 --> 00:00:50,390

Они как раз обедают в люкс-лаунж-зоне.

00:00:50,860 --> 00:00:54,720

Даже не знаю, впишемся ли мы в место, где...

Святые портянки!

00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:58,980

Это же чужой из фильма «Чужой и генерал Чанг»

из «Стар Трека 4»!

00:00:59,690 --> 00:01:01,290

Стоп, они ж вроде злодеи.

00:01:01,300 --> 00:01:02,600

Только на экране.

00:01:02,610 --> 00:01:04,310

В жизни они партнёры-продюсеры.

00:01:04,320 --> 00:01:07,260

Чанг, процитируй Шекспира на клингонском!

00:01:07,270 --> 00:01:09,590

Он не любит, когда об этом просят.

00:01:09,780 --> 00:01:13,490

И где нужно подписать?

Полагаю, нас ждёт церемония вступления?

00:01:13,500 --> 00:01:16,990

Нужно будет ходить в трусах,

много пить, возможно, будут пытки?

00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:19,160

И я смогу носить свои теннисные юбки!

00:01:19,170 --> 00:01:21,660

Надоели жалобы со скалолазания.

00:01:21,670 --> 00:01:23,750

Ну и что, что вам всё видно? В этом и смысл.

00:01:23,760 --> 00:01:27,620

Я был за на слове «эксклюзивный».

Не то, что детский клуб Бургер Кинга.

00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:29,289

И это просто идеальное место,

00:01:29,300 --> 00:01:33,100

чтобы завести роман

с инструктором по танцам по ту сторону закона.

00:01:33,110 --> 00:01:37,340

Прежде всего, нужно найти время

для встречи с советом, чтобы вас одобрили.

00:01:37,350 --> 00:01:40,550

Я считаю, вы супер, но они не многих сюда допускают.

00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:42,720

Правда? Блин, тогда нам кабзда.

00:01:42,730 --> 00:01:45,140

Надо ответить. Это парень по ювелирке.

00:01:45,150 --> 00:01:49,440

Но у вас есть все шансы. Совету лишь нужно

убедиться, что вы не стрёмные чудики.

00:01:49,450 --> 00:01:51,049

Нет, мы нормальные.

00:01:52,410 --> 00:01:54,510

Эй, Корво, у тебя глаз выпал.

00:01:54,520 --> 00:01:56,570

Что? Они решат, что это стрёмно!

00:01:56,580 --> 00:01:57,650

Спрячь его, спрячь!

00:01:57,660 --> 00:02:00,450

Ну вот,

комиссия готова встретиться с вами завтра.

00:02:00,460 --> 00:02:02,620

Почему так? Завтра же Хэллоуин.

00:02:02,630 --> 00:02:04,870

Они не будут отмечать, как все остальные?

00:02:04,880 --> 00:02:10,568

Здесь в «Люксовых Елях» не отмечают

туполобые праздники наподобие Хэллоуина.

00:02:10,580 --> 00:02:12,070

А что, вы завтра не можете?

00:02:12,100 --> 00:02:15,170

Нет, нет, мы ненавидим Хэллоуин.

У нас и лбов-то почти нет.

00:02:15,180 --> 00:02:15,780

Мы придём.

00:02:15,790 --> 00:02:17,720

Хорошо. Я уверен, что вас возьмут.

00:02:17,730 --> 00:02:18,743

До завтра.

00:02:20,450 --> 00:02:23,373

Солнечные противоположности

вступают в загородный клуб!

00:02:23,380 --> 00:02:26,270

А мы сделаем вид, что ты сейчас не блеванул мышью?

00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:27,779

Потому что ты не был рад,

00:02:27,790 --> 00:02:32,550

когда из меня вышел хэллоуинский

спецэпизод «Солнечных противоположностей»!

00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:35,510

Планета Шлорп была просто идеальной тыквой,

00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:37,678

пока не грохнулась клоунская башка.

00:02:37,790 --> 00:02:42,120

Сотне взрослых особей и их репликантам

выдали по пупе и отправили в космос,

00:02:42,130 --> 00:02:44,102

где была куча паутины и конфет.

00:02:44,110 --> 00:02:48,500

Мы рухнули на Землю в ведьмовской шляпе,

планету, кишащую людьми.

00:02:48,510 --> 00:02:53,540

Да, да, это мой призрак.

Я держу Пупу, меня зовут Корво. Это мой спецвыпуск.

00:02:53,550 --> 00:02:55,321

Вот чёрт, я уронил Пупу.

00:02:55,330 --> 00:02:56,510

Как же нелепо.

00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:58,670

Ненавижу Хэллоуин, тупой праздник.

00:02:58,680 --> 00:03:02,010

Неужели мы снова это делаем?

Гляньте на фиолетового кота.

00:03:02,020 --> 00:03:05,320

СОЛНЕЧНЫЕ ПРОТИВОПОЛОЖНОСТИ

ХЭЛЛОУИНСКИЙ СПЕЦВЫПУСК 2

00:03:08,310 --> 00:03:11,060

Блин, так тупо, что они не отмечают Хэллоуин.

00:03:11,070 --> 00:03:13,770

Почему в «Люксовых Елях» не уважают ДР Дракулы?

00:03:13,780 --> 00:03:15,360

За что они дальше возьмутся?

00:03:15,370 --> 00:03:17,830

О, а может тогда устроим спецвыпуск про школу?

00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:21,610

Можно будет всем подсесть

на наркоту и играть с оголёнными проводами.

00:03:21,620 --> 00:03:22,820

Хэллоуин — отстой.

00:03:22,830 --> 00:03:25,490

В моём списке праздников он даже ниже Песаха.

00:03:25,500 --> 00:03:27,540

А Dia de los Mentos наверху.

00:03:27,550 --> 00:03:29,500

Про День свежести нужно помнить.

00:03:29,510 --> 00:03:30,440

Украшения?

00:03:30,450 --> 00:03:34,330

Что во фразе

«Мы не празднуем Хэллоуин» вам было непонятно?

00:03:34,340 --> 00:03:36,880

Ты всё ещё считаешь его слишком жутким?

00:03:36,890 --> 00:03:40,010

Нет, я просто хочу стать членом «Люксовых Елей».

00:03:40,020 --> 00:03:43,202

Хэллоуин на выход,

роскошная элегантная жизнь — сюда.

00:03:44,860 --> 00:03:48,680

Корво, я говорю со всем уважением,

но какого хрена у тебя с глазами?

00:03:48,690 --> 00:03:49,890

Не знаю, и мне срать.

00:03:49,900 --> 00:03:54,560

Ну просто с этими глазами

и летучей мышью ты выглядишь довольно жутко.

00:03:54,570 --> 00:03:56,270

Я скажу тебе, что не жутко.

00:03:56,280 --> 00:03:58,176

Лазурная теннисная юбка от Ало-Йога.

00:03:58,330 --> 00:03:59,802

О, дай сюда!

00:04:00,620 --> 00:04:02,450

Эй, с тобой всё нормально?

00:04:02,460 --> 00:04:04,320

Да, займёмся насущным вопросом.

00:04:04,330 --> 00:04:05,950

А ничего, что у тебя зубы выпали?

00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:08,020

Просить улыбнуться — не по-феминистски.

00:04:08,030 --> 00:04:09,450

Ты как стрёмная тыква.

00:04:09,460 --> 00:04:12,231

Вообще нет! Я обыкновенный лысый пришелец.

00:04:16,010 --> 00:04:18,090

Привет, мои милашки.

00:04:18,100 --> 00:04:22,920

Я — Первая ведьма,

один из легендарных призраков Хэллоуина.

00:04:22,940 --> 00:04:27,390

Я несу хэллоуинское веселье

и хаос всем, кто его отмечает.

00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:28,640

Ого, господи!

00:04:28,650 --> 00:04:30,833

Привет. С Хэллоуином, Первая ведьма.

00:04:30,860 --> 00:04:35,700

Перестань. В этой семье верят в науку.

И днём мы перестали отмечать Хэллоуин.

00:04:37,030 --> 00:04:39,730

Перестали отмечать Хэллоуин?

00:04:39,740 --> 00:04:45,710

О нет, моя милашка. Думаю,

скоро ты поймёшь, что ты и есть Хэллоуин.

00:04:46,410 --> 00:04:47,980

Хватит звать меня милашкой.

00:04:47,990 --> 00:04:51,160

Я максимум симпатичный,

а с Хэллоуином я вообще не связан.

00:04:51,170 --> 00:04:54,290

С тех пор,

как ты убил Великую тыкву на прошлый Хэллоуин,

00:04:54,300 --> 00:04:57,380

дух этого праздника вселился в тебя, моя милашка.

00:04:57,470 --> 00:04:59,380

Так, секундочку. Чего?!

00:04:59,390 --> 00:05:01,800

Корво — новая Великая тыква.

00:05:01,810 --> 00:05:05,460

Завали тыкворезку!

Я новый член загородного клуба!

00:05:05,470 --> 00:05:08,510

Ты не сможешь противиться великому духу.

00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:11,666

Если попробуешь, он проявится вокруг тебя.

00:05:12,620 --> 00:05:14,418

Это не остановить.

00:05:14,430 --> 00:05:16,921

Ведь ты — это Великая тыква!

00:05:16,930 --> 00:05:19,382

Да? А тыква стала бы делать так?

00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:24,490

Корво, нет. Хватить палить

в волшебных существ прямо в гостиной.

00:05:24,500 --> 00:05:26,410

Я только эльфа от ковра отскрёб.

00:05:26,420 --> 00:05:28,450

Твою же мать, она оживает!

00:05:28,460 --> 00:05:31,620

Сай-фай штуки

на магических существ не действуют.

00:05:31,630 --> 00:05:32,740

Да, это же все знают.

00:05:32,750 --> 00:05:34,730

Пупа, Джей-Кей Севенс!

00:05:34,970 --> 00:05:37,416

Если придумаете, как убить ведьмовёнка,

00:05:37,430 --> 00:05:41,000

я куплю вам эту длинную липкую руку,

которая вам нравится.

00:05:41,010 --> 00:05:42,920

Но сай-фай штуки не работают.

00:05:42,930 --> 00:05:46,800

Я напоминаю, потому что

вы не разговариваете, а забывать об этом нельзя.

00:05:46,810 --> 00:05:48,077

Хорошо.

00:05:48,670 --> 00:05:52,060

Минуточку.

Ты же сказал, что Великая тыква была в порядке.

00:05:52,070 --> 00:05:54,730

Ну, я не помню, чтобы говорил именно так.

00:05:54,740 --> 00:05:58,270

А я помню. Тут происходит что-то странное, Корво.

00:05:58,280 --> 00:06:02,520

Да, Хэллоуин — это тупо, а Великая тыква —

огромная задница, но ты правда это говорил.

00:06:02,530 --> 00:06:03,801

Я был в затруднении.

00:06:03,810 --> 00:06:07,141

Наш сосед Рендалл слишком

увлёкся своим домом с привидениями,

00:06:07,150 --> 00:06:09,360

он хотел убить меня и хранителя гробницы.

00:06:09,370 --> 00:06:11,517

Мне пришлось порезать Тыкву ради спасения.

00:06:11,530 --> 00:06:15,140

Откуда я знал,

что её силы передаются, как у Санта Клауса?

00:06:15,150 --> 00:06:17,481

Какое-то дебильное смешение жанров, как по мне.

00:06:17,490 --> 00:06:19,210

Звучит как-то натянуто.

00:06:19,220 --> 00:06:23,460

Даю вам слово, когда вступим в клуб,

сразу же разберёмся с этой тыквенной хренью.

00:06:23,470 --> 00:06:25,281

Хорошо, но я хочу это запомнить,

00:06:25,290 --> 00:06:28,130

а не как со всем остальным,

что мы обещаем запомнить.

00:06:28,140 --> 00:06:30,890

На день станем богачами, а потом займёмся тыквой.

00:06:30,900 --> 00:06:32,470

Ура, Хэллоуин!

00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:34,832

Да мать твою, помогите зубы собрать.

00:06:35,110 --> 00:06:37,100

ТЦ «ГРЕТХЕН-ДАРТ-МОЛЛОУИН»

00:06:37,110 --> 00:06:38,800

«ГУЛЬЧЧИ»

00:06:39,830 --> 00:06:41,672

Вам облегающий крой?

00:06:41,680 --> 00:06:43,660

Если такой носят зазнайки из клуба.

00:06:43,690 --> 00:06:45,468

Почти все носят облегающий.

00:06:47,620 --> 00:06:48,820

О господи...

00:06:48,830 --> 00:06:50,973

Я, видимо, забыл сегодня принять Оземпик.

00:06:50,980 --> 00:06:52,099

Перемерьте.

00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:56,687

Il fantasma!

00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:03,285

Корво, ведьма сказала, что, если будешь отрицать

свою хэллоуинность, начнутся странности.

00:07:03,300 --> 00:07:05,460

И вот теперь ты тыква, а Терри — привидение!

00:07:05,470 --> 00:07:06,710

Ты отлично выглядишь.

00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:09,158

Конечно, отлично. Я ж красавчик, дорогуша.

00:07:09,170 --> 00:07:12,495

Но я не хочу быть призраком.

На мне футболки не держатся.

00:07:14,020 --> 00:07:16,749

И как скрыть

на собеседовании то, что Терри — призрак?

00:07:16,810 --> 00:07:22,980

Если мы не можем поразить их своими нарядами,

можно сделать это с помощью дорогой тачки.

00:07:22,990 --> 00:07:24,060

Да, отличная мысль.

00:07:24,070 --> 00:07:26,650

Я всегда сужу людей на цене их машины.

00:07:26,660 --> 00:07:29,929

Дурацкий хвост сперматозоида,

я как выпердыш Каспера.

00:07:34,630 --> 00:07:36,830

Мои милашки!

00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:38,145

Пока-пока.

00:07:49,190 --> 00:07:49,760

БУ-МВ! ОЖУТИТЕЛЬНЫЕ СКИДКИ!

00:07:49,770 --> 00:07:54,050

Вас интересуют скидки,

от которых волосы встают дыбом или трещат кости?

00:07:54,060 --> 00:07:58,320

Хватит каламбуров,

нам нужна самая загородно-клубная тачка!

00:08:00,700 --> 00:08:01,710

Какого хрена?

00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:04,350

Даже не начинай. Ведьма об этом предупреждала.

00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:07,597

Простите, но если люди увидят

таких чудаков в нашей машине,

00:08:07,610 --> 00:08:09,570

весь бренд будет выглядеть стрёмно.

00:08:09,580 --> 00:08:10,900

Такое уже случалось.

00:08:10,910 --> 00:08:12,221

С Tesla.

00:08:12,830 --> 00:08:15,808

Может, нам хватит идеального этикета?

00:08:15,820 --> 00:08:19,200

Тут сказано,

что надо начинать с краю и двигаться внутрь.

00:08:19,210 --> 00:08:22,481

Этот нож ничем не поможет,

если я захочу кого-то пырнуть.

00:08:22,490 --> 00:08:24,750

Слишком тупой. Ай, я порезался!

00:08:24,760 --> 00:08:26,000

Бо-бо, ай!

00:08:26,010 --> 00:08:28,654

Прекрати, цыц.

Богатые люди заморачиваются по этой фигне.

00:08:28,660 --> 00:08:30,630

Надо сделать вид, что мы тоже.

00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,010

Ладно, хорошо, сделаем.

00:08:32,020 --> 00:08:33,301

Хорошо, я в вас верю.

00:08:33,310 --> 00:08:36,890

Плюс, я подвёл к столу ток,

так что отвечайте правильно.

00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:38,956

Нельзя подвести ток к скатерти.

00:08:40,310 --> 00:08:42,360

Это моя пырятельная рука!

00:08:42,370 --> 00:08:45,700

Корво, кажется,

ты всё-таки победил хэллоуинскую жуть.

00:08:47,200 --> 00:08:52,780

Мяу! Похоже, я теперь стал секси-кошечкой,

в которых все наряжаются на Хэллоуин.

00:08:52,790 --> 00:08:56,000

Вот блин, так нечестно. Я хотел был секси-кошечкой.

00:08:58,210 --> 00:08:59,620

О нет, это Рэнч!

00:08:59,630 --> 00:09:01,830

Ведите себя так, будто мы не превратились.

00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:04,620

Приветик, Рэнч. Какой приятный сюрприз.

00:09:04,630 --> 00:09:05,830

Ну всё, пока-пока.

00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:09,520

Я лишь хотел убедиться,

что мои любимые пришельцы готовы.

00:09:09,530 --> 00:09:13,550

Боже мой, вы все такие жуткие,

хотя были просто сай-файными.

00:09:13,560 --> 00:09:14,680

Тебе кажется.

00:09:14,690 --> 00:09:16,202

Ничего мне не кажется.

00:09:16,210 --> 00:09:20,640

Я вижу, что ты превращаешься в тыкву

и заражаешь всех вокруг хэллоуинской магией.

00:09:20,650 --> 00:09:23,375

Блин, а он хорош. Ну, хотя бы я всё ещё пришелец.

00:09:24,500 --> 00:09:25,770

Ауф-тяф!

00:09:25,780 --> 00:09:31,030

Я превратилась в оборотня

и хочу сожрать все ваши конфеты!

00:09:31,910 --> 00:09:34,060

Что за хрень у вас тут происходит?

00:09:34,070 --> 00:09:36,081

Сложно объяснить, но ставлю миллион,

00:09:36,090 --> 00:09:38,900

что до завтра

этого хэлллоуинского хаоса не будет.

00:09:39,630 --> 00:09:40,518

Да!

00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:44,104

Если что, ставка была риторической.

00:09:47,480 --> 00:09:51,670

В таком виде вас

в «Люксовые ели» не примут. Совет — консерваторы.

00:09:51,680 --> 00:09:54,050

Они курят в доме и не пристёгиваются.

00:09:54,060 --> 00:09:55,830

Может, перенесём собеседование?

00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:59,050

Они как раз смягчат свои взгляды

после нового Аватара.

00:09:59,060 --> 00:10:01,180

Нет, завтра последний день приёма.

00:10:01,190 --> 00:10:02,922

Но раз на кону моё доброе имя,

00:10:02,930 --> 00:10:06,440

я помогу вам найти способ

избавиться от это хэллоуинности.

00:10:06,450 --> 00:10:07,438

Мы на всё готовы.

00:10:07,450 --> 00:10:09,570

И мы умеем скрывать, что мы мерзкие.

00:10:10,990 --> 00:10:15,020

Фу, ириски, гадость. Хотя конфеты есть конфеты.

00:10:15,030 --> 00:10:16,136

Да блин.

00:10:16,630 --> 00:10:17,610

Да блин.

00:10:17,620 --> 00:10:19,410

Он не будет так делать при совете?

00:10:19,420 --> 00:10:19,890

О нет.

00:10:19,900 --> 00:10:20,890

- Да блин.

- Нет.

00:10:20,900 --> 00:10:25,810

Продолжать есть конфеты нет никакого смысла,

но я всё равно продолжу.

00:10:26,090 --> 00:10:30,000

Думаешь, покрасив меня в дорогой цвет,

мы сможем обмануть богачей?

00:10:30,010 --> 00:10:32,960

Именно этой краской выкрашены

статуэтки премии Webby.

00:10:32,970 --> 00:10:34,420

Эксклюзивное дерьмо.

00:10:34,430 --> 00:10:36,500

Это же ей отравился Железный дровосек?

00:10:36,510 --> 00:10:38,826

Да, пришлось брать на AliExpress.

00:10:39,650 --> 00:10:41,078

Да чтоб тебя!

00:10:42,010 --> 00:10:46,458

Из хэллоуинской мохнатки в секси-красотку.

00:10:47,750 --> 00:10:49,253

Вот блин.

00:10:50,410 --> 00:10:54,170

Ну что? Не похож я на призрака? Секусуальненько?

00:10:54,180 --> 00:10:56,860

Нет, ты просто похож на более дешёвого призрака.

00:10:56,870 --> 00:10:58,470

А если в ультрафиолете?

00:10:59,580 --> 00:11:00,820

На пятна не смотри.

00:11:00,830 --> 00:11:03,660

Это только моча, дерьмо, кровь и суп.

00:11:03,670 --> 00:11:04,685

И сперма.

00:11:04,850 --> 00:11:08,120

Соберись, ты не в сестринство собрался вступать.

00:11:08,130 --> 00:11:09,370

Повторяй за мной.

00:11:09,380 --> 00:11:12,360

Корабли лавировали,

лавировали да не вылавировали.

00:11:12,370 --> 00:11:16,630

Мяу, может хватит уже этой фигни

и поедем в город тусить?

00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:20,240

Корабли лавировали,

лавировали да не вылавировали.

00:11:20,250 --> 00:11:23,050

Подержим друг другу волосы, пока будем блевать?

00:11:23,060 --> 00:11:24,470

Корабли лавировали, лави...

00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:26,390

Джеки переспала с Дэнисом?

00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,270

Она знала, что мы переписываемся.

00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:30,419

Помоги мне её уничтожить!

00:11:30,820 --> 00:11:32,270

Это невозможно.

00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:34,440

Слишком много хэллоуинского хаоса.

00:11:34,450 --> 00:11:38,820

И, если честно, то вы довольно мерзкие,

и у вас какое-то клиническое СДВГ.

00:11:38,830 --> 00:11:40,570

И я всё ещё похож на тыкву.

00:11:40,580 --> 00:11:42,362

Но я хочу носить теннисную юбку,

00:11:42,370 --> 00:11:45,330

пить содовую

и сплетничать с другими жёнами богачей.

00:11:45,340 --> 00:11:46,870

Это моя мечта, чтоб вас!

00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:51,960

Можно попробовать одно средство,

но оно довольно радикальное.

00:11:51,970 --> 00:11:54,250

Я и сам когда-то обожал Хэллоуин.

00:11:54,260 --> 00:11:55,920

На втором курсе Гарварда.

00:11:55,930 --> 00:11:59,630

Мне нравилось бухать, делать вид,

что фарш — это мозги Франкенштейна,

00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:03,680

и целый месяц смотреть

по кругу «Восставшего из ада 2».

00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:06,930

Но увлечение моей юности позорили семью.

00:12:06,940 --> 00:12:08,020

И как тебе помогли?

00:12:08,030 --> 00:12:11,440

У них была книга тёмной магии из Старого Света.

00:12:11,450 --> 00:12:13,810

Они создали эликсир, который исцелил меня.

00:12:13,820 --> 00:12:15,060

Обожаю эликсиры.

00:12:15,070 --> 00:12:17,549

Это же как Нэсти из мира магии.

00:12:17,560 --> 00:12:19,551

А почему ты не сразу дал нам эликсир?

00:12:20,190 --> 00:12:23,780

Я не хотел предлагать,

ведь он вызывает ужасные перемены.

00:12:23,790 --> 00:12:25,700

Вы даже сами себя не узнаете.

00:12:25,710 --> 00:12:26,830

Так это нам и нужно.

00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:30,700

Крутая тачка, это одно.

Но ты уверен, что стоит лезть в тёмную магию?

00:12:30,710 --> 00:12:31,830

Нам придётся.

00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:34,750

Боже, я бы сейчас убил за Космополитен.

00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:38,840

Не знаю, может, мы просто дикая семья,

которой не место в «Люксовых Елях»?

00:12:38,850 --> 00:12:42,970

Мы можем быть дикарями у себя дома,

но при этом всё равно тусить с богачами.

00:12:42,980 --> 00:12:44,110

Лучшее из двух миров!

00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:44,840

Согласна.

00:12:44,850 --> 00:12:48,470

И не только потому,

что ты процитировал песню из «Ханны Монтаны».

00:12:48,480 --> 00:12:51,310

Нам лишь нужен огромный котёл и источник огня.

00:12:51,320 --> 00:12:54,600

Класс,

повод достать нам многофункциональный котёл.

00:12:54,610 --> 00:12:57,360

А ты говорил, что второй раз не пригодится.

00:12:58,030 --> 00:12:58,480

КНИГА РЕЦЕПТОВ МЁРТВЫХ

00:12:58,490 --> 00:13:02,690

Эта книга —

семейная реликвия, привезённая на Мейфлауэре.

00:13:02,700 --> 00:13:05,110

Боже, воняет, как хрен дохлой собаки.

00:13:05,210 --> 00:13:06,700

Уж я-то разбираюсь.

00:13:06,710 --> 00:13:08,280

Она древняя и сделана из кожи.

00:13:08,290 --> 00:13:10,490

А пахнет она из-за потопа в подвале.

00:13:10,500 --> 00:13:14,670

Нужно бросить в котёл всё,

что вызывает хэллоуинский хаос.

00:13:14,680 --> 00:13:18,590

Пустую миску для конфет,

на дне которой сказано жертвовать в ЮНИСЕФ.

00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:20,946

Костюм Наполеона Динамита.

00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:22,760

Прощай, мой милый принц.

00:13:22,770 --> 00:13:26,410

Мешок монет, который дала тебе старуха.

00:13:26,990 --> 00:13:28,100

Жадная тварь.

00:13:28,110 --> 00:13:33,940

Пару яиц, туалетную бумагу и так далее!

00:13:35,050 --> 00:13:36,270

Эликсир готов.

00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:40,120

Теперь искупайтесь в нём,

чтобы смыть праздничный хаос.

00:13:42,370 --> 00:13:44,280

О господи! Как же жжёт!

00:13:44,290 --> 00:13:47,240

Так себя чувствует язык

в каждом выпуске Hot Ones!

00:13:47,250 --> 00:13:49,700

Он работает!

00:14:00,970 --> 00:14:02,060

Получилось?

00:14:02,070 --> 00:14:02,980

Да!

00:14:03,690 --> 00:14:05,010

Я же вроде кричал.

00:14:05,020 --> 00:14:06,617

Я из котла не слышал.

00:14:06,630 --> 00:14:08,470

Ну да. В общем, сработало.

00:14:15,110 --> 00:14:17,230

Да! Ура!

00:14:32,110 --> 00:14:33,936

Вы очень нас удивили.

00:14:33,950 --> 00:14:37,410

Обычно совет находит пришельцев

слишком забавными,

00:14:37,420 --> 00:14:39,420

с этими вашими вечными лучами.

00:14:39,430 --> 00:14:40,710

Нет, мы не такие.

00:14:40,720 --> 00:14:43,460

Нам нравится быть богатыми и не высовываться.

00:14:43,470 --> 00:14:46,340

Я вас понимаю. Но у меня ещё один вопрос.

00:14:46,350 --> 00:14:49,770

Какой ваш любимый вид кубков?

00:14:50,850 --> 00:14:52,121

С камнями?

00:14:52,950 --> 00:14:56,180

Нас поразило ваше спокойное, размеренное,

00:14:56,190 --> 00:14:58,480

почти бесхарактерное отношение.

00:14:58,490 --> 00:15:02,810

Поэтому ваша заявка в «Люксовые Ели» одобрена.

00:15:02,820 --> 00:15:04,216

Ура.

00:15:04,250 --> 00:15:06,593

Лучший момент в нашей жизни.

00:15:07,110 --> 00:15:10,860

Именно так устало и отвечают в «Люксовых Елях».

00:15:11,270 --> 00:15:13,830

Мы смогли, мы теперь члены, как и вы.

00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:15,910

Покажете свой маленький рот во рту?

00:15:15,920 --> 00:15:19,000

Будь у меня такой, я бы отсасывал всё, что движется.

00:15:19,010 --> 00:15:20,250

Вы что это делаете?

00:15:20,260 --> 00:15:22,920

Это зал только для элитный членов клуба.

00:15:22,930 --> 00:15:25,070

Мы прошли тест богачей, мы члены.

00:15:26,190 --> 00:15:28,050

Вы идиоты, а не члены.

00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:30,130

Но мы пожали руку старику.

00:15:30,140 --> 00:15:35,220

Оглядитесь и скажите,

носит ли здесь кто-то ещё такие ужасные пиджаки.

00:15:35,230 --> 00:15:36,520

Господи-боже.

00:15:36,530 --> 00:15:38,140

Если это не членские пиджаки...

00:15:38,150 --> 00:15:40,252

Вас наняли, как парковщиков.

00:15:44,050 --> 00:15:46,020

Ведёшь себя, как полная сучара.

00:15:46,030 --> 00:15:47,676

Пришельцы должны объединяться.

00:15:47,690 --> 00:15:50,780

Мы настоящие пришельцы,

а не какие-то тупые растения.

00:15:50,790 --> 00:15:53,200

Поэтому и стали звёздами кино-франшиз.

00:15:53,210 --> 00:15:55,870

Подгони мой Rivian, одуванчик тупой.

00:15:55,880 --> 00:15:59,040

Чтобы вы знали, мы хороший друзья Рэнча Уайта.

00:15:59,050 --> 00:16:01,750

Когда он об этом узнает, вам конец.

00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:02,880

Что за Рэнч Уайт?

00:16:02,890 --> 00:16:06,050

Самое очевидно выдуманное имя

для богача, что я слышал.

00:16:08,770 --> 00:16:10,970

Первое впечатление было не очень,

00:16:10,980 --> 00:16:14,260

но, может, завтра,

когда припаркуем пару машин, будет повеселее.

00:16:14,270 --> 00:16:16,390

Этот клуб — сборище богатых козлов,

00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:18,970

а эти пришельцы — самые паршивые из всех.

00:16:18,980 --> 00:16:20,770

Надо было это предвидеть.

00:16:20,780 --> 00:16:24,060

Кому мы вообще нужны

в месте под названием «Люксовые Ели»?

00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:25,560

Мы же даже не хвойные.

00:16:25,570 --> 00:16:28,230

И почему они делали вид, будто не знают Рэнча?

00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:32,070

А самое худшее,

что мы свалили всё хэллоуинское веселье в котёл.

00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:33,240

А мы любим Хэллоуин.

00:16:33,250 --> 00:16:34,686

Тридцать первое октября.

00:16:34,700 --> 00:16:37,870

Мы ещё успеем забрать

из котла свой хэллоуинский хаос.

00:16:39,260 --> 00:16:42,620

Нет, вся наша хэллоуинская жижа из котла пропала!

00:16:42,630 --> 00:16:43,790

Не может быть.

00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:46,210

Может, это не наш корабль с котлом?

00:16:46,220 --> 00:16:47,281

Где твои ключи?

00:16:47,290 --> 00:16:50,180

Пикни, чтобы проверить, точно ли это наш.

00:16:54,230 --> 00:16:56,720

Рэнч, почему у тебя глаза светятся?

00:16:56,730 --> 00:16:59,520

Это ты выпил нашу хэллоуинскую жижу?

00:16:59,530 --> 00:17:01,833

Кудах-кудах, уроды.

00:17:23,150 --> 00:17:24,830

Кудах, кудах!

00:17:24,840 --> 00:17:26,210

Это он ржёт так?

00:17:26,220 --> 00:17:28,380

Да, но никто не кудахчет на Хэллоуин.

00:17:28,390 --> 00:17:31,460

Ты налажал, Рэнч!

Нас собеседовали как парковщиков!

00:17:31,470 --> 00:17:32,780

Я вас подставил!

00:17:32,790 --> 00:17:34,050

Правда? Зачем?

00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:37,720

Я вовсе не Рэнч Уайт,

крутой тип из загородного клуба.

00:17:37,730 --> 00:17:44,940

На самом деле, я праздничный дух

Дня благодарения, Великий коричневый подливыч!

00:17:45,710 --> 00:17:46,520

Чего-чего?

00:17:46,530 --> 00:17:47,690

Вы обо мне слышали.

00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:50,070

Я как Великая тыква, но от Дня благодарения.

00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:52,640

Ясно, видно, ты не самый популярный дух.

00:17:52,650 --> 00:18:00,330

Когда Великую тыкву зарезали, я затаился

и составил план, как похитить её силы у Корво.

00:18:00,340 --> 00:18:02,200

Но День благодарения другой.

00:18:02,210 --> 00:18:06,330

Именно поэтому

я и должен навсегда уничтожить Хэллоуин!

00:18:06,340 --> 00:18:07,524

Нет!

00:18:08,010 --> 00:18:10,420

Эй, убери свои подливные руки от моего мужика!

00:18:10,430 --> 00:18:15,800

День благодарения всегда на втором плане,

никто не ждёт его ради сухой индюшки.

00:18:15,810 --> 00:18:17,380

Оставь Хэллоуин в покое.

00:18:17,390 --> 00:18:19,050

У тебя есть свой праздник.

00:18:19,060 --> 00:18:24,890

Скоро люди и вовсе забудут о Дне благодарения,

как о плуговом понедельнике.

00:18:24,900 --> 00:18:29,440

Может, Дню благодарения пора умереть.

Люди могут ужинать вместе просто так.

00:18:29,450 --> 00:18:34,150

О, только не с моими удвоенными силами

праздничного духа!

00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:39,360

Я украду всё, что есть у Хэллоуина

и применю это ко Дню благодарения.

00:18:39,460 --> 00:18:42,950

Нездоровое количество алкоголя,

бахчевые культуры,

00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:46,910

дети, ходящие по домам

и собирающие клюквенный соус!

00:18:46,920 --> 00:18:50,080

Это будет просто замечательно!

00:18:50,090 --> 00:18:52,319

Нет, если мы надерём тебе зад!

00:18:53,060 --> 00:18:56,340

Сай-файные устройства не действуют на духов.

00:18:56,350 --> 00:19:00,160

Победить меня можно было

лишь с помощью хэллоуинского барахла,

00:19:00,170 --> 00:19:05,600

а вы, тупицы, выбросили всё своё в котёл.

00:19:07,490 --> 00:19:09,850

Внизу ещё есть конфеты и украшения.

00:19:09,860 --> 00:19:12,450

Надерём булки этому жидкому уроду.

00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:21,370

Давайте подумаем перед дракой,

за что мы больше всего благодарны.

00:19:21,380 --> 00:19:22,891

Нет, в жопу иди!

00:19:24,550 --> 00:19:25,685

Получай!

00:19:26,050 --> 00:19:29,960

Блин, он превращает хэллоуинские штуки

в барахло плугового понедельника!

00:19:29,970 --> 00:19:32,359

Дня благодарения, придурок!

00:19:33,970 --> 00:19:36,720

Чёрт! Взять их, мои аппетитные воины!

00:19:41,810 --> 00:19:43,050

Все на задний двор!

00:19:43,060 --> 00:19:48,350

Вы можете бежать,

но праздники всё равно вас догонят.

00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:53,110

Какого хрена?

Где все пластиковые пауки и надувные динозавры?

00:19:53,120 --> 00:19:56,240

Я искал юбку вместо того, чтобы украшать двор!

00:19:57,500 --> 00:20:01,096

Только не клюквенный соус! Нам капец!

00:20:01,190 --> 00:20:05,740

Пупа, умоляю, скажи,

что вы не смогли убить ведьмовёнка.

00:20:05,750 --> 00:20:07,660

О боже, они убили её!

00:20:07,670 --> 00:20:09,020

За что?!

00:20:09,490 --> 00:20:12,120

Оторвали ей голову! Вот срань!

00:20:12,810 --> 00:20:14,526

Теперь Хэллоуину конец.

00:20:14,540 --> 00:20:18,720

И Дом с привидениями в Диснейленде

станет обычным домом.

00:20:23,730 --> 00:20:25,510

В чём ты хочешь признаться?

00:20:25,520 --> 00:20:27,260

Где вы взяли эти машинки?

00:20:27,270 --> 00:20:28,707

Ведьмовёнок!

00:20:29,260 --> 00:20:33,650

Она подкупила вас машинками,

а вы дали ей закуски и место, где жить?

00:20:33,660 --> 00:20:36,060

Плохой Пупа и плохой робот!

00:20:36,070 --> 00:20:38,440

Эй, это я переводить не буду.

00:20:38,450 --> 00:20:41,178

Повезло вам, что нам нужен этот ведьмовёнок.

00:20:43,370 --> 00:20:45,240

Пора ужинать!

00:20:45,250 --> 00:20:50,130

Ведьма, прости, что пытался убить тебя

и за остальную фигню. Помоги нам спасти Хэллоуин!

00:20:55,430 --> 00:20:57,840

Ладно, признаю. Я был неправ насчёт Хэллоуина.

00:20:57,850 --> 00:20:59,340

Это чудесный праздник.

00:20:59,350 --> 00:21:00,840

И для детей, и для взрослых.

00:21:00,850 --> 00:21:05,220

Костюмы, конфеты, яблоки —

всё это очень здорово. И я обожаю сезонное пиво.

00:21:05,230 --> 00:21:08,630

И можно заценить дом соседей,

когда они раздают конфеты.

00:21:08,640 --> 00:21:10,390

И Хэллоуин вовсе не жуткий.

00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:12,542

Хэллоуин рулит!

00:21:22,250 --> 00:21:23,470

Прыгай!

00:21:24,710 --> 00:21:27,490

Вы опоздали. Хэллоуин уже мёртв.

00:21:27,500 --> 00:21:31,620

Отныне люди будут

есть тыквы только в виде пирогов!

00:21:36,270 --> 00:21:37,380

Больно же!

00:21:37,390 --> 00:21:38,440

Но как?

00:21:38,450 --> 00:21:42,130

Хэллоуин лучший.

Вечеринки Хайди Клум. Парные костюмы.

00:21:42,140 --> 00:21:45,050

Чувак в костюме пингвина, который блюёт на улице.

00:21:45,060 --> 00:21:47,220

Дом, где раздают хорошие конфеты.

00:21:47,230 --> 00:21:48,300

Фильмы ужасов!

00:21:48,310 --> 00:21:53,605

Никому не нужно сидеть за столом и слушать,

как дядя-расист жалуется на пакистанцев,

00:21:53,620 --> 00:21:57,650

потому что из-за них обанкротилась

сеть кафе Boston Market!

00:22:06,330 --> 00:22:08,160

Ого, чуть не вляпались.

00:22:08,170 --> 00:22:11,040

Какой-то огрызок мне чуть горло не перерезал.

00:22:15,970 --> 00:22:18,710

Спасибо за то, что спас Хэллоуин, Корво.

00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:25,170

Твоя искренняя любовь к этому празднику

доказала, что ты достоин стать Великой тыквой.

00:22:25,180 --> 00:22:26,470

Ура, Корво!

00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:27,200

Ты это сделал!

00:22:27,210 --> 00:22:28,300

Молодец, Корво!

00:22:28,310 --> 00:22:29,470

Конфеты!

00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:31,746

Вообще-то, я это всё не всерьёз говорил.

00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:33,720

Я лишь повторял за Терри.

00:22:33,730 --> 00:22:35,680

Для меня Хэллоуин слишком жуткий.

00:22:35,690 --> 00:22:37,520

Даже ты меня до усрачки пугаешь.

00:22:37,530 --> 00:22:41,580

Но тогда у Хэллоуина

не будет новой Великой тыквы.

00:22:41,590 --> 00:22:43,440

Нет. Всё будет.

00:22:43,450 --> 00:22:45,885

Сама становись духом Хэллоуина.

00:22:56,590 --> 00:23:00,025

Ведьма, исполняющая роль Великой тыквы?

00:23:00,560 --> 00:23:03,028

Вы знали, что такого раньше не было?

00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:04,460

Нет. А откуда бы?

00:23:04,470 --> 00:23:05,840

Ох, Корво.

00:23:05,850 --> 00:23:10,753

Если бы я могла сказать той девочке, которой была

до того, как съела летучую мышь и стала ведьмой,

00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:13,350

что этот день настанет,

знаешь, что бы она ответила?

00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:15,915

То, что заканчивается на «моя милашка»?

00:23:15,930 --> 00:23:18,600

Вот именно, моя милашка!

00:23:18,700 --> 00:23:21,400

У меня ещё есть время посеять хэллоуинский хаос.

00:23:21,410 --> 00:23:25,360

Но сперва, я хочу

исполнить твоё хэллоуинское желание.

00:23:25,370 --> 00:23:28,540

Проси конфеты Altoids Sours.

Их больше не выпускают.

00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:31,264

Исполнено!

00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:35,450

Можете прекратить?

00:23:35,460 --> 00:23:37,290

Ай! Моя нога!

00:23:37,300 --> 00:23:41,010

Мы не можем припарковать машины,

пока вы не остановитесь!

00:23:43,140 --> 00:23:45,130

Теперь этот клуб огонь!

00:23:45,140 --> 00:23:47,322

Эй, крутое желание, Корво.

00:23:48,590 --> 00:23:50,300

Весёлого Хэллоуина, Терри.

00:23:50,310 --> 00:23:52,535

Ещё какого весёлого, мистер.

00:23:52,550 --> 00:23:57,580

Переведено студией HDrezka Studio.

00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:18,101

a saltwater spa, $15 iced teas,

and regular-sized golf.

00:00:18,101 --> 00:00:20,228

I didn't know you could putt-putt

without the windmill!

00:00:20,228 --> 00:00:22,647

It's just short grass.

We have that at home.

00:00:22,647 --> 00:00:25,817

Bone marrow on tap and an oyster bar?

00:00:25,817 --> 00:00:28,486

Is there anything fancy

Fancington doesn't have?

00:00:28,486 --> 00:00:30,113

Genre inclusivity.

00:00:30,113 --> 00:00:33,408

That's why I'm the chair

of the Sci-Fi Diversity Initiative.

00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:37,495

We have so many rich humans

and only a couple rich aliens.

00:00:37,495 --> 00:00:39,789

Your family would be

an excellent addition.

00:00:39,789 --> 00:00:43,418

Hold up, the only time I'm a token alien

is at a Phish concert, bruh.

00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:45,336

Oh, you're not token at all.

00:00:45,336 --> 00:00:47,380

We already have sci-fi members.

00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:50,091

They're dining in

the Luxe Lounge right now.

00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:54,637

I don't know if we're going

to fit in at a place like... Holy socks!

00:00:54,637 --> 00:00:56,139

Oh! That's the alien from Alien

00:00:56,139 --> 00:00:58,683

and General Chang from

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country.

00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:02,520

- Wait, aren't they bad guys?

- Only on screen.

00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:04,230

In real life, they're producing partners.

00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:06,441

Hey, Chang!

Quote some Klingon Shakespeare!

00:01:06,441 --> 00:01:09,194

He doesn't like it when people ask that.

00:01:09,778 --> 00:01:10,987

Where do we sign

the membership agreement?

00:01:10,987 --> 00:01:13,406

I assume there's some fraternity hazing

we have to endure?

00:01:13,406 --> 00:01:14,783

Walking around in our underwear,

00:01:14,783 --> 00:01:16,910

drinking to excess,

maybe some light torture?

00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:19,079

I'll finally have a place

to wear my tennis skirts!

00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,581

I'm so sick of all the written complaints

from the climbing gym.

00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:23,666

So what if they're getting a peep?

That's the point.

00:01:23,666 --> 00:01:25,835

I was in the moment

I heard it was exclusive,

00:01:25,835 --> 00:01:27,545

not like the Burger King Kids Club.

00:01:27,545 --> 00:01:28,797

This is the perfect place

00:01:28,797 --> 00:01:30,965

for a whirlwind romance

with a dance instructor

00:01:30,965 --> 00:01:32,884

who's from the wrong side of the tracks.

00:01:32,884 --> 00:01:34,302

Before any of that,

00:01:34,302 --> 00:01:36,054

we need to find a time

for you to meet with the board

00:01:36,054 --> 00:01:37,263

to be evaluated.

00:01:37,263 --> 00:01:40,475

I think you're great,

but they don't let many new families in.

00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:42,644

They don't?

Oh, man, we're boned!

00:01:42,644 --> 00:01:43,937

Ugh, I gotta take this.

00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:45,063

It's my uncut gem guy.

00:01:45,063 --> 00:01:46,773

You guys have a real chance.

00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:49,359

They just wanna make sure

you aren't freaky weirdos.

00:01:49,359 --> 00:01:50,735

We're very normal.

00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:54,572

Uh, Korv? Your eye just fell out!

00:01:54,572 --> 00:01:56,491

What, ew!

He's gonna think we're weird.

00:01:56,491 --> 00:01:57,575

Hide it, hide it!

00:01:57,575 --> 00:02:00,370

Alright, I think I can get you in

with the admissions board tomorrow.

00:02:00,370 --> 00:02:02,539

Well, that can't be right.

Tomorrow's Halloween!

00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:04,791

Won't they be busy Monster Mashing

like everyone else?

00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:07,752

We don't celebrate

a lowbrow nitwit holiday

00:02:07,752 --> 00:02:10,672

like Halloween here at Fancington Pines.

00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:12,006

Will tomorrow be a problem?

00:02:12,006 --> 00:02:13,258

No, no!

00:02:13,258 --> 00:02:15,093

We hate Halloween,

and we don't even have brows.

00:02:15,093 --> 00:02:17,637

- We'll be there.

- Great, I'll make sure you're confirmed!

00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:19,848

See you tomorrow.

00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:23,560

The Solar Opposites

are joining a country club!

00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:26,187

Sorry, are we just gonna ignore the fact

that you barfed up a bat?

00:02:26,187 --> 00:02:28,648

Because you got real upset

when I barfed up

00:02:28,648 --> 00:02:32,277

The Solar Opposites

Halloween Special 2!

00:02:32,735 --> 00:02:35,530

Planet Shlorp was

a perfect Jack-O-Lantern

00:02:35,530 --> 00:02:37,740

until the clown head hit.

00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:40,326

A hundred adults and their replicants

were issued a Pupa

00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:42,036

and shot into the... space

00:02:42,036 --> 00:02:44,247

which was full

of cobwebs and candy.

00:02:44,247 --> 00:02:46,499

We crashed on Earth

wearing a big witch hat,

00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:48,418

stranding us on

an already decorated planet.

00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:50,628

Yes, that's right,

I've been haunting this whole time.

00:02:50,628 --> 00:02:51,713

I'm the one holding the Pupa.

00:02:51,713 --> 00:02:53,464

My name's Korvo.

This is my special.

00:02:53,464 --> 00:02:55,216

Oh, bollocks,

I just dropped the Pupa.

00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:56,509

Oh, this is ridiculous.

00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:58,595

I hate Halloween.

It's a horrible holiday.

00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:00,471

Oh, I can't believe

we're doing this again.

00:03:00,471 --> 00:03:01,931

Look at that big purple cat!

00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:10,982

{\an8}Man, I'm so dang peeved

that we aren't really doing Halloween.

00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:13,693

{\an8}How can Fancington Pines

not respect Dracula's birthday?

00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:15,278

{\an8}God, what'll the libs ruin next?

00:03:15,278 --> 00:03:18,198

{\an8}Oh, maybe we should do

an afterschool special instead!

00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:21,534

{\an8}We can all get addicted to drugs

and play with a downed power line.

00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:22,744

{\an8}Halloween sucks!

00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:25,413

{\an8}It's below Passover

in my top ten list of holidays.

00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:27,457

{\an8}Dia de los Mentos is at the top!

00:03:27,457 --> 00:03:29,417

{\an8}You gotta celebrate the Freshmaker!

00:03:29,417 --> 00:03:31,085

{\an8}Decorations?

00:03:31,085 --> 00:03:34,255

{\an8}What part of, "We aren't doing Halloween"

do you two not understand?

00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:36,799

{\an8}Wait, is this because you still think

Halloween is too spooky?

00:03:36,799 --> 00:03:39,928

{\an8}No, the only thing I'm scared of

is not getting into Fancington Pines.

00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:43,264

{\an8}Halloween is out,

being classy and non-nitwitty is in.

00:03:43,264 --> 00:03:44,766

{\an8}

00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:46,684

{\an8}Korvo, I wanna be respectful here,

00:03:46,684 --> 00:03:48,603

{\an8}but what the fuck is happening

with your eyes?

00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:49,812

{\an8}I don't know, who gives a shit?

00:03:49,812 --> 00:03:52,899

{\an8}It's just, the eye thing

combined with the bat barfing,

00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:54,484

{\an8}you're seeming kinda spooky.

00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:56,194

{\an8}I'll tell you what's not spooky.

00:03:56,194 --> 00:03:58,238

{\an8}This Cerulean Alo Yoga tennis skirt.

00:03:58,238 --> 00:03:59,322

{\an8}Oh, gimme!

00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:00,531

{\an8}Ugh!

00:04:00,531 --> 00:04:02,367

{\an8}Uh, you okay, buddy?

00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:04,244

{\an8}Yes, let's focus on the task at hand.

00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:05,870

{\an8}You know your teeth just fell out.

00:04:05,870 --> 00:04:07,914

{\an8}It's not very feminist

to ask people to smile.

00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:09,374

{\an8}You look like a creepy pumpkin.

00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:11,793

{\an8}What, no, I don't!

I'm just a regular hairless alien!

00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:18,007

Hello, my pretties!

00:04:18,007 --> 00:04:20,260

I am the First Witch,

00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,845

one of the legendary spirits of Halloween.

00:04:22,845 --> 00:04:27,308

I spread Halloween fun

and chaos to all who celebrate.

00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:28,559

Wow, oh, my God!

00:04:28,559 --> 00:04:30,770

{\an8}Welcome!

Happy Halloween, The First Witch.

00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:32,939

{\an8}Piss off!

We are a family of science,

00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:35,108

{\an8}and we stopped celebrating

Halloween earlier today.

00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:39,654

Stopped celebrating Halloween?

00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:41,739

{\an8}Oh, no, my pretty,

00:04:41,739 --> 00:04:45,410

{\an8}I think you'll find

that you are Halloween!

00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:47,578

Stop calling me pretty.

00:04:47,578 --> 00:04:49,414

At most, I'm boyishly handsome,

00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:51,082

and I have nothing to do with Halloween.

00:04:51,082 --> 00:04:54,210

Since you killed the Great Pumpkin

last Halloween,

00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:57,380

his holiday spirit has transferred

to you, my pretty.

00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:59,299

Uh, needle scratch, what?

00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,718

Korvo is the new Great Pumpkin!

00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:02,802

Shut your witch ass up.

00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:04,887

I'm a great addition

to a country club, is what I am.

00:05:04,887 --> 00:05:08,433

Agh! There is no resisting

the Halloween spirit.

00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:11,227

If you try, it will manifest around you.

00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:14,397

There's no stopping this.

00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:17,066

You are the Great Pumpkin!

00:05:17,066 --> 00:05:18,901

Oh, yeah?

Would the Great Pumpkin do this?

00:05:21,029 --> 00:05:24,407

Korvo, no! You gotta stop zapping

holiday creatures in the living room.

00:05:24,407 --> 00:05:26,326

I just got that elf out of the carpet.

00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,369

Oh, bollocks, she's reforming!

00:05:28,369 --> 00:05:31,539

You can't destroy a magical witch

with sci-fi stuff, Korvo.

00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:32,665

Yeah, everyone knows that.

00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:34,042

Pupa, JK Sevens!

00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:36,836

If you can find a way

to kill this Witchlet,

00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:38,129

I will buy each one of you

00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:40,923

one of those sticky, slappy hand things

you love so much.

00:05:40,923 --> 00:05:42,842

Remember, sci-fi stuff won't work.

00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:44,969

I'm only bringing it up again

because neither of you really talk,

00:05:44,969 --> 00:05:46,721

so I wanna make sure

you don't forget it later.

00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:48,723

Alright!

00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:49,807

Wait a minute.

00:05:49,807 --> 00:05:51,976

You told us that the Great Pumpkin

was alive and well.

00:05:51,976 --> 00:05:54,645

I... I don't recall saying

those exact words.

00:05:54,645 --> 00:05:58,191

I do. Something fishy

is going on here, Korvo!

00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:01,152

Yeah, I think Halloween is stupid

and the Great Pumpkin is a bubble butt,

00:06:01,152 --> 00:06:02,445

but you did say that!

00:06:02,445 --> 00:06:04,030

I was in a tight spot.

00:06:04,405 --> 00:06:07,158

Our neighbor Randall, the one who was

way too into his haunted house,

00:06:07,158 --> 00:06:09,285

he was gonna kill me and the Crypt Keeper.

00:06:09,285 --> 00:06:11,329

I had to carve up

the Great Pumpkin to save us.

00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:13,081

How was I supposed to know his powers

00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:15,124

followed the same rules

as The Santa Clause?

00:06:15,124 --> 00:06:17,543

That's some bullshit genre mixing,

if you ask me.

00:06:17,543 --> 00:06:19,128

It does seem like a stretch.

00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:21,506

Look, I promise, after we get

into the country club,

00:06:21,506 --> 00:06:23,383

we'll deal with the Great Pumpkin stuff.

00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:26,511

Okay, but I don't wanna forget

like we do with everything else

00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:28,054

we say we aren't gonna forget.

00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:30,807

We have one day to get posh,

and then we'll do the pumpkin shit.

00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,103

Oh, dammit.

Help me pick up my teeth.

00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:39,941

Oh!

00:06:39,941 --> 00:06:41,734

You want-a da slim fit?

00:06:41,734 --> 00:06:43,528

Whatever your snootiest

club members wear.

00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:45,279

Most of them wear-a slim fit.

00:06:47,532 --> 00:06:48,741

Oh, Go... Oh!

00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:50,993

I, I must have forgotten

to take my Ozempic!

00:06:50,993 --> 00:06:53,413

Measure again.

00:06:54,789 --> 00:06:56,624

Il fantasma!

00:06:58,709 --> 00:07:00,545

Korvo, the Witch said

spooky stuff would happen

00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:02,046

if you resisted your Halloween-ness,

00:07:02,046 --> 00:07:03,548

and now you're clearly a pumpkin

00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:05,383

and Terry turned into a friggin' ghost!

00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:06,634

I still think you look great.

00:07:06,634 --> 00:07:09,137

Of course, I look great, honey.

I'm a dime piece.

00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:12,265

But I don't wanna be a ghost.

Now I can't wear any cool shirts, see?

00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:13,933

Ugh!

00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:16,602

How are we going to hide

Terry's ghost-ness at the interview?

00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:19,230

If we can't impress them

with fancy new outfits,

00:07:19,230 --> 00:07:22,900

maybe we can distract them

with fancy-ass cars.

00:07:22,900 --> 00:07:23,985

Yes, great idea.

00:07:23,985 --> 00:07:26,571

I always judge people

by the price of their car.

00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:27,989

Stupid sperm tail.

00:07:27,989 --> 00:07:30,116

I look like Casper the Friendly Fart!

00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:36,747

My pretties!

00:07:36,747 --> 00:07:38,040

Bye-bye.

00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:52,346

Can I interest you in any

of our hair-raising deals

00:07:52,346 --> 00:07:53,973

with bone-rattling low rates?

00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,391

You can cut the Halloween crap.

00:07:55,391 --> 00:07:58,019

Give us your fanciest,

most country-club-iest, car-iest car.

00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:02,732

- What the hell?

- Don't even start!

00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,275

That witch said this would happen.

00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:05,860

I'm sorry,

but if people saw someone

00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:07,445

as weird as you

in one of our vehicles,

00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,489

it could make the entire brand seem dorky.

00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:10,573

It's happened before.

00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:12,283

Tesla.

00:08:12,825 --> 00:08:15,870

Maybe all we need

is perfect table manners.

00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:17,955

{\an8}It says here, you're supposed

to start on the outside

00:08:17,955 --> 00:08:19,123

{\an8}and work your way in.

00:08:19,123 --> 00:08:21,501

This blade ain't gonna do the trick

if I need to fuck someone up.

00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,670

It's way too dull.

Ah, I cut myself!

00:08:24,670 --> 00:08:25,922

Owie, ow!

00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:27,006

Stop it, shut up!

00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:29,217

Fancy people care about

this stuff, so we have to.

00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:30,551

I need you to make an effort.

00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:31,928

Okay, fine, we will.

00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:33,387

Good, I trust you.

00:08:33,387 --> 00:08:34,972

Plus, I'm electrifying the table,

00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:36,807

so try hard to get the answers right.

00:08:36,807 --> 00:08:38,684

You can't electrify a tablecloth.

00:08:39,936 --> 00:08:42,021

Ow, you zapped my stabbin' hand!

00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:44,023

Hey, Korvo, I think

you finally figured out

00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:45,399

how to beat the Halloween spookiness.

00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:50,446

Meow. Looks like now

I'm one of those sexy cats

00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:52,698

everyone's always

dressing up as for Halloween.

00:08:52,698 --> 00:08:54,116

Aw, man, no fair!

00:08:54,116 --> 00:08:55,701

I wanna be a sexy cat.

00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:59,539

Oh, no, it's Ranch!

00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,832

Everyone act like

we aren't turning into shit.

00:09:01,832 --> 00:09:04,544

Hello there, Ranch.

What a pleasant surprise.

00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:05,753

'Kay, bye, now.

00:09:05,753 --> 00:09:07,672

I just wanted to check on

my favorite aliens

00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:08,839

before their big day.

00:09:08,839 --> 00:09:11,842

Oh, my God, you're all so spooky.

00:09:11,842 --> 00:09:13,469

You all used to be sci-fi.

00:09:13,469 --> 00:09:14,595

It's not what it looks like.

00:09:14,595 --> 00:09:16,264

I know exactly what it looks like,

00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:17,848

and it looks like

you're turning into a pumpkin

00:09:17,848 --> 00:09:20,560

and transforming those around you

with some sort of Halloween magic.

00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:21,644

Damn, he's good.

00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:23,104

Hey, at least I'm still an alien.

00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:25,690

Aoofta!

00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:30,736

Now I'm a werewolf,

and I'm hungry for candy corn!

00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:34,031

What the hell is going on around here?

00:09:34,031 --> 00:09:36,117

It's hard to explain,

but I'll bet you a billion dollars

00:09:36,117 --> 00:09:38,452

we can undo this Halloween chaos

before tomorrow.

00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:41,872

Yeah!

00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:44,250

Just to be clear,

that was a rhetorical bet.

00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:49,422

There's no chance

you'll get into Fancington

00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:50,506

looking like this.

00:09:50,506 --> 00:09:51,591

We have a conservative board.

00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,968

They all smoke indoors,

and none of them wear seat belts.

00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:56,137

Maybe we can push the interview,

do it later in the year

00:09:56,137 --> 00:09:57,638

where their right-wing views

will be softened

00:09:57,638 --> 00:09:58,973

by watching the Avatar movies.

00:09:58,973 --> 00:10:01,100

No, tomorrow's the last day

they're meeting people!

00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:02,643

But since my name's on the line,

00:10:02,643 --> 00:10:06,355

I'll help you find a way to hide

all this disgusting Halloweenie-ness.

00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:07,440

We'll do anything.

00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,275

We're good at hiding

how disgusting we are.

00:10:10,901 --> 00:10:12,945

Ew, Mary Janes, barf.

00:10:12,945 --> 00:10:14,363

Still, candy is candy.

00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:15,781

Oh, goddamn it.

00:10:16,115 --> 00:10:17,533

Mm, goddamn it.

00:10:17,533 --> 00:10:19,327

He's not gonna do this

in front of the board, right?

00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:20,620

- Oh, no, no.

- Goddamn it!

00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,497

It doesn't make any sense for me

to keep eating this candy,

00:10:23,497 --> 00:10:25,207

but I'm gonna do it.

00:10:26,083 --> 00:10:27,877

You really think

this is gonna trick the rich folk,

00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:29,920

covering up my orange

and making me look expensive?

00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:32,882

This is the exact shade of silver they use

on the Webby Award statues.

00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:34,383

Top-of-the-line shit.

00:10:34,383 --> 00:10:36,385

Is that the same paint

that poisoned the Tin Man?

00:10:36,385 --> 00:10:38,721

Yeah, that's why we had

to buy it through AliExpress.

00:10:38,721 --> 00:10:41,015

Oh, dammit!

00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:42,850

Ooh, la, la.

00:10:42,850 --> 00:10:46,187

I went from Halloween tragic

to sexy magic.

00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,273

Oh, geez.

00:10:50,399 --> 00:10:53,152

What do you think?

Not looking like a ghost now, huh?

00:10:53,152 --> 00:10:55,237

- Pretty hot, right?

- Mm, it's not working.

00:10:55,237 --> 00:10:56,781

You just look like an even cheaper ghost.

00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:58,240

How about with the blacklight?

00:10:59,575 --> 00:11:00,743

Don't worry about the stains.

00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:03,579

They're just piss and shit

and soup and blood.

00:11:03,579 --> 00:11:04,664

And cum.

00:11:05,039 --> 00:11:08,042

Focus, you're not a sorority girl,

and this isn't rush week.

00:11:08,042 --> 00:11:09,293

Now, repeat after me.

00:11:09,293 --> 00:11:12,171

"The quarrelsome queen

quaffed quickly and quietly."

00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:15,049

Meow! Why don't we quit

this silly nonsense

00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:16,550

and go out on the town?

00:11:16,550 --> 00:11:19,929

"The quarrelsome queen

quaffed quickly and quietly!"

00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:22,973

Wanna hold each other's hair

when we throw up?

00:11:22,973 --> 00:11:24,392

"The quarrelsome queen--"

00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:26,310

Jackie hooked up with Dennis?

00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:28,187

That bitch knows we've been texting.

00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:30,064

You have to help me destroy her!

00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:32,191

This is impossible.

00:11:32,191 --> 00:11:34,360

You all have too much

Halloween chaos energy.

00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,737

Plus, to be honest,

you're also kind of gross,

00:11:36,737 --> 00:11:38,739

and I think you have

clinical focus issues.

00:11:38,739 --> 00:11:40,491

And I still look like a pumpkin.

00:11:40,491 --> 00:11:42,993

But I wanna wear the tennis skirts

and drink seltzer water

00:11:42,993 --> 00:11:45,246

and be judgmental

with the other pro shop wives.

00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:46,789

It's my dream, dammit.

00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:49,709

There's one last thing we could try,

00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:51,877

but it's pretty drastic.

00:11:51,877 --> 00:11:54,171

I used to dabble in Halloween myself.

00:11:54,171 --> 00:11:55,840

My sophomore year at Harvard.

00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:57,133

I loved the drinking,

00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:59,552

the pretending that ground beef

was Frankenstein's brains,

00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,971

and watching Hellbound: Hellraiser II

over and over again

00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:03,597

for the entire month of October!

00:12:03,597 --> 00:12:06,851

But my youthful dalliances

brought great shame to my family.

00:12:06,851 --> 00:12:07,935

How did they heal you?

00:12:07,935 --> 00:12:09,603

They had a book from the Old World

00:12:09,603 --> 00:12:11,355

full of witchcraft and dark magic.

00:12:11,355 --> 00:12:13,733

They used it to create an elixir

which straightened me out.

00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:14,984

I love elixirs!

00:12:14,984 --> 00:12:17,403

They're like the Snapples

of the magic world.

00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:19,071

Why didn't we do the elixir thing

right off the bat?

00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:21,532

Whoa! I didn't wanna suggest it.

00:12:21,532 --> 00:12:23,701

The elixir causes a drastic change!

00:12:23,701 --> 00:12:25,619

You won't recognize yourselves.

00:12:25,619 --> 00:12:26,746

Yes, that's what we need!

00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,497

Trying to buy a fancy car is one thing,

00:12:28,497 --> 00:12:30,624

but are you sure you wanna mess

with dark magic?

00:12:30,624 --> 00:12:31,751

We have to.

00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:34,670

God, I would kill for a cosmo right now.

00:12:34,670 --> 00:12:36,922

I don't know, maybe we're just

a chaotic family

00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:38,758

and aren't cut out for Fancington Pines.

00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:41,260

We can be our chaotic selves

in the privacy of our own home

00:12:41,260 --> 00:12:42,887

and hobnob with the elites at the club.

00:12:42,887 --> 00:12:44,764

- Best of both worlds!

- Okay.

00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:48,392

And not just because you quoted

the Hannah Montana theme song.

00:12:48,392 --> 00:12:51,228

All we need is a big,

black pot with a heat source.

00:12:51,228 --> 00:12:54,523

Whoa, we get to use

the multipurpose holiday cauldron again.

00:12:54,523 --> 00:12:57,067

And you said we'd never use it

more than twice.

00:12:58,402 --> 00:13:01,071

This book is

an old family heirloom

00:13:01,071 --> 00:13:02,615

brought over on the Mayflower.

00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:05,117

Goddamn, this smells

like a dead dog's dick.

00:13:05,117 --> 00:13:06,619

And I would know.

00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:08,204

It's ancient and made from skin!

00:13:08,204 --> 00:13:10,414

But the smell is from when

my basement flooded last year.

00:13:10,414 --> 00:13:13,125

We must cast that

which makes Halloween chaotic

00:13:13,125 --> 00:13:14,585

into the cauldron!

00:13:14,585 --> 00:13:18,506

An empty candy bowl with a note

telling you to donate to UNICEF!

00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:20,925

A Napoleon Dynamite costume!

00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:22,676

Farewell, sweet prince.

00:13:22,676 --> 00:13:26,347

A sack of pennies handed out

by an elderly woman!

00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:28,015

Ugh, cheap bitch.

00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:33,646

Some eggs, some toilet paper,

and et cetera.

00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:36,190

The elixir is set.

00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:37,483

Oh, now you must bathe in it

00:13:37,483 --> 00:13:39,819

to remove the holiday chaos

from yourselves.

00:13:42,279 --> 00:13:44,198

Oh, God! Oh, it burns!

00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:47,159

This is what it must feel like

to be a tongue on Hot Ones!

00:13:47,159 --> 00:13:49,703

It's working!

00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:03,425

- Did it work?

- Yes!

00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:04,927

Didn't you hear me screaming?

00:14:04,927 --> 00:14:06,637

No, I was in a cauldron.

00:14:06,637 --> 00:14:08,472

Right. Well, yes, it worked.

00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:17,231

Yeah, woo-hoo!

00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:33,956

You've surprised us today.

00:14:33,956 --> 00:14:37,334

This board usually finds aliens

to be too whimsical,

00:14:37,334 --> 00:14:39,336

zapping things with rays and whatnot.

00:14:39,336 --> 00:14:40,629

Oh, that's not us.

00:14:40,629 --> 00:14:43,382

We just like to be rich

and hold as still as possible.

00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:46,260

I know it well.

I just have one final question.

00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:49,471

What is your favorite type of chalice?

00:14:49,471 --> 00:14:51,640

Uh, jeweled.

00:14:53,058 --> 00:14:56,103

We are most impressed

with your sedate, compliant,

00:14:56,103 --> 00:14:58,397

almost paper-white temperament.

00:14:58,397 --> 00:15:02,735

Your application

to Fancington Pines is accepted.

00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:04,361

[unenthusiastically] Yay.

00:15:04,361 --> 00:15:06,155

This is the high point of our lives.

00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:09,158

That's the unmistakable bored affect

00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:10,868

of a Fancington man.

00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:13,746

We did it.

We're members just like you.

00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,831

Can I see that little mouth

you got inside your mouth?

00:15:15,831 --> 00:15:18,918

Oh, man, if I had one of those,

I'd be fucking and sucking everything.

00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:20,169

What do you think you're doing?

00:15:20,169 --> 00:15:22,838

This is the private

members-only dining room.

00:15:22,838 --> 00:15:24,798

We just passed the rich guy test,

we're members.

00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:27,968

You fools aren't members!

00:15:27,968 --> 00:15:30,054

But we shook an old man's hand.

00:15:30,054 --> 00:15:34,683

Look around and tell me if anyone else

is wearing one of those hideous blazers.

00:15:35,225 --> 00:15:36,435

Oh, my God.

00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:38,062

If these aren't members' blazers...

00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:39,980

You just got hired as valets.

00:15:43,817 --> 00:15:45,986

You're being a real bitch right now.

00:15:45,986 --> 00:15:47,613

Us aliens have to stick together.

00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:50,783

We're real aliens,

not some low-rent plants.

00:15:50,783 --> 00:15:53,118

That's why we're the stars

of film franchises.

00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:55,788

Fetch my Rivian, you dandelion bitch.

00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:58,958

I'll have you know

we are personal friends with Ranch White.

00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,669

When he finds out about this,

heads will roll!

00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:02,795

Who's Ranch White?

00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:05,756

That's the most made-up

rich guy name I've ever heard.

00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,011

As first impressions go,

not great,

00:16:11,011 --> 00:16:14,181

but I say we go back tomorrow,

park a few cars, and see if it's fun.

00:16:14,181 --> 00:16:16,308

That club is full of nothing

but rich twunts,

00:16:16,308 --> 00:16:18,894

and those aliens were

the biggest shitbags of the bunch!

00:16:18,894 --> 00:16:20,688

We should have seen this coming!

00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:23,983

Why would a place called

Fancington Pines ever want us?

00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,484

We're not pines.

00:16:25,484 --> 00:16:28,153

And why did they act like

they didn't know who Ranch was?

00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:30,614

The worst part is, we gave away

all our fun Halloween chaos

00:16:30,614 --> 00:16:31,991

to get into that stupid club.

00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:33,158

We love Halloween.

00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:34,660

It's October 31st.

00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,787

We still have time

to get our Halloween chaos

00:16:36,787 --> 00:16:37,871

back from the cauldron.

00:16:37,871 --> 00:16:39,373

Oh!

00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:42,543

No, all our chaotic cauldron goo is gone!

00:16:42,543 --> 00:16:43,711

That can't be right.

00:16:43,711 --> 00:16:46,130

Did we go to the wrong alien spaceship

with a cauldron in it?

00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:47,297

Where, where are your keys?

00:16:47,297 --> 00:16:49,883

Just do the beep to see if we...

if this is the wrong one.

00:16:54,221 --> 00:16:56,640

Ranch, why are your eyes glowing?

00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,435

Did you drink the chaos goo?

00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:01,603

Gobble, gobble, motherfuckers.

00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:24,752

Gobble, gobble, gobble!

00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:26,128

Is he laugh-gobbling?

00:17:26,128 --> 00:17:28,297

Yeah, but nobody gobbles on Halloween.

00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:30,007

You really messed up, Ranch!

00:17:30,007 --> 00:17:31,383

That was an interview for valets!

00:17:31,383 --> 00:17:34,053

- I set you up!

- You did, why?

00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:37,639

I'm not Ranch White,

cool country club fuck boi.

00:17:37,639 --> 00:17:41,560

I'm actually the holiday spirit

of Thanksgiving,

00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:44,646

the Grand Brown Gravy!

00:17:44,646 --> 00:17:46,440

The what now?

00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,608

You've heard of me.

00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:49,985

I'm like the Great Pumpkin

but for Thanksgiving,

00:17:49,985 --> 00:17:52,112

Okay, must not be as popular of a spirit.

00:17:52,112 --> 00:17:55,199

Oh, once the Great Pumpkin was slain,

00:17:55,199 --> 00:17:56,533

I've been waiting,

00:17:56,533 --> 00:18:00,329

plotting to steal his powers from Korvo.

00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:02,122

But Thanksgiving is nothing

like Halloween!

00:18:02,122 --> 00:18:06,251

Which is why I have

to destroy Halloween forever!

00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:07,920

No!

00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:10,047

Hey, get your nasty-ass gravy

off my man.

00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:12,382

Thanksgiving is always an afterthought,

00:18:12,382 --> 00:18:15,719

a punchline nobody looks forward to

because of the dry turkey.

00:18:15,719 --> 00:18:17,304

Just leave Halloween alone!

00:18:17,304 --> 00:18:18,972

You already have a holiday!

00:18:18,972 --> 00:18:21,934

One day, people won't remember

Thanksgiving at all,

00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:24,812

just like Plough Monday!

00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:26,688

Maybe Thanksgiving deserves to die,

00:18:26,688 --> 00:18:29,358

and people can just get together

and have dinner.

00:18:29,358 --> 00:18:34,154

Oh, not with my new

double holiday spirit powers!

00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:39,368

I will steal everything about Halloween

and apply it to Thanksgiving!

00:18:39,368 --> 00:18:42,871

An irresponsible amount

of drinking, sexy gourds,

00:18:42,871 --> 00:18:46,834

and kids going door to door

to get slices of cranberry sauce!

00:18:46,834 --> 00:18:50,003

It's going to be beautiful!

00:18:50,003 --> 00:18:51,880

Not if we kick your ass first!

00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:56,260

Sci-fi stuff doesn't work

on holiday spirits.

00:18:56,260 --> 00:19:00,013

The only thing that could destroy me

would be Halloween stuff,

00:19:00,013 --> 00:19:05,602

and you dumbasses threw

all yours in a cauldron!

00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:09,773

We still have Halloween candy

and decorations downstairs.

00:19:09,773 --> 00:19:12,151

Let's use those to take

this butt nugget down!

00:19:15,028 --> 00:19:18,323

Let's take a moment before fighting

00:19:18,323 --> 00:19:21,285

to reflect on what

we're most thankful for.

00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:23,036

No, fuck you!

00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:25,539

Take that!

00:19:26,039 --> 00:19:29,793

Oh, crap, he turned our Halloween stuff

into Plough Monday shit.

00:19:29,793 --> 00:19:32,296

It's Thanksgiving shit, you bastard!

00:19:33,881 --> 00:19:36,425

Dammit, attack them, my food warriors.

00:19:41,805 --> 00:19:42,973

Let's get to the backyard!

00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:48,353

You can run, but the holidays

always creep up!

00:19:49,396 --> 00:19:51,481

What the hell?

Where are all the plastic spiders

00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:53,025

and inflatable pride dinosaurs?

00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:55,944

I spent too much of my decorating time

looking for tennis skirts!

00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:59,198

Not the cranberry sauce!

00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:00,532

We're so fucked!

00:20:00,532 --> 00:20:03,118

Pupa, please, please tell me

00:20:03,118 --> 00:20:04,786

you didn't manage to kill the Witchlet.

00:20:04,786 --> 00:20:07,581

Oh, God, they killed her!

00:20:07,581 --> 00:20:08,707

Why?

00:20:08,707 --> 00:20:10,584

They ripped her head off!

00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:12,920

It's so sick.

00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,338

Halloween is over forever!

00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:18,425

The Haunted Mansion at Disneyland

will just be a regular mansion now.

00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:25,432

What do you mean

you have a confession?

00:20:25,432 --> 00:20:27,184

Wait, where did you two

get these things?

00:20:27,184 --> 00:20:28,518

Witchlet!

00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:33,565

You let her bribe you with Power Wheels

then gave her snacks and a place to stay?

00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,984

Bad Pupa and bad robot!

00:20:35,984 --> 00:20:38,362

Whoa, I am not translating that.

00:20:38,362 --> 00:20:40,864

You're lucky we need this Witchlet,

or you'd be in big trouble.

00:20:43,283 --> 00:20:45,160

It's dinnertime!

00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:46,870

Please, little witch,

forgive me for trying

00:20:46,870 --> 00:20:48,080

to kill you and all the other stuff!

00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:49,831

Please help us save Halloween!

00:20:49,831 --> 00:20:50,916

Hmph.

00:20:55,337 --> 00:20:57,756

Okay, I'll admit it.

I was wrong about Halloween.

00:20:57,756 --> 00:20:59,258

Halloween is a fabulous holiday.

00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:00,759

It's fun for the kids and for adults.

00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:02,844

Dressing up, begging for candy,

bobbing for apples,

00:21:02,844 --> 00:21:05,138

it's all a delight.

I like the seasonal beer.

00:21:05,138 --> 00:21:06,723

I like how you get to check out

your neighbor's house

00:21:06,723 --> 00:21:08,642

when they open the door

for trick-or-treaters!

00:21:08,642 --> 00:21:10,310

Halloween is not too spooky.

00:21:10,310 --> 00:21:12,312

Halloween rules!

00:21:22,155 --> 00:21:24,074

Hop on!

- Oh!

00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:27,411

You're too late! Halloween's dead.

00:21:27,411 --> 00:21:31,623

From now on,

pumpkins will only be eaten in pie!

00:21:34,626 --> 00:21:37,296

Oh, that hurts!

00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:39,631

- But how?

- Halloween is the best.

00:21:39,631 --> 00:21:42,050

Heidi Klum's annual party.

Couples' costumes.

00:21:42,050 --> 00:21:44,970

Watching someone dressed

as a penguin vomit on the street.

00:21:44,970 --> 00:21:47,139

The house that gives out

full-size candy bars.

00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:48,223

"The Monster Mash"!

00:21:48,223 --> 00:21:51,268

Nobody has to sit at a table

and listen to a racist uncle

00:21:51,268 --> 00:21:53,687

talk about how

they don't like the Pakistanis

00:21:53,687 --> 00:21:57,357

that bought the Boston Market down on I-5!

00:22:06,241 --> 00:22:08,076

Whew, that was a close one.

00:22:08,076 --> 00:22:11,121

I almost got my throat cut

by some bitch-ass giblets.

00:22:15,959 --> 00:22:18,628

Thank you for saving Halloween, Korvo.

00:22:18,628 --> 00:22:20,589

Your honest love for the holiday

00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:25,093

proved that you truly deserve

to be the Great Pumpkin.

00:22:25,093 --> 00:22:26,386

- Yay, Korvo!

- Woo-hoo!

00:22:26,386 --> 00:22:28,221

- You did it!

- Good job, Korvo!

00:22:28,221 --> 00:22:29,389

Candy!

00:22:29,389 --> 00:22:32,267

Actually, all that stuff

I said back there, I didn't mean it.

00:22:32,267 --> 00:22:33,643

It was all stuff Terry has said.

00:22:33,643 --> 00:22:35,604

Halloween is still too spooky for me.

00:22:35,604 --> 00:22:37,439

I'm honestly scared shitless

of you right now.

00:22:37,439 --> 00:22:41,735

But then Halloween won't have

a Great Pumpkin.

00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:43,362

No, it does.

00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:45,030

You should be the spirit of Halloween.

00:22:56,583 --> 00:23:00,670

A witch as the Great Pumpkin?

00:23:00,670 --> 00:23:02,881

Did you know this has

never happened before?

00:23:02,881 --> 00:23:04,383

No, why would we?

00:23:04,383 --> 00:23:05,759

Oh, Korvo.

00:23:05,759 --> 00:23:07,594

If I could go back

and tell that little girl

00:23:07,594 --> 00:23:09,971

that I used to be before I ate that bat

and became a witch

00:23:09,971 --> 00:23:13,350

that this would happen one day,

you know what she would say?

00:23:13,350 --> 00:23:15,519

Uh, something that ends with, "My pretty"?

00:23:15,519 --> 00:23:18,605

Exactly, my pretty!

00:23:18,605 --> 00:23:21,316

I still have time

to spread Halloween chaos.

00:23:21,316 --> 00:23:25,278

But first, I want to grant you

a Halloween wish.

00:23:25,278 --> 00:23:28,073

Ask for some Altoids Sours.

They don't make 'em anymore.

00:23:29,908 --> 00:23:31,701

Granted.

00:23:33,870 --> 00:23:35,372

Would you quit it?

00:23:35,372 --> 00:23:37,207

Ow, my foot!

00:23:37,207 --> 00:23:40,710

We can't park them

if you don't stop driving.

00:23:40,710 --> 00:23:43,046

♪ Spooky, scary skeletons

speak with such a screech ♪

00:23:43,046 --> 00:23:44,798

This club rules now!

00:23:45,132 --> 00:23:46,967

Hey, hey, good wish, Korvo.

00:23:47,801 --> 00:23:50,220

Happy Halloween, Terry.

00:23:50,220 --> 00:23:52,222

Hell yes, it is, mister.

00:23:52,222 --> 00:23:54,099

♪ But I don't think we should ♪

00:23:54,099 --> 00:23:55,976

♪ 'Cause spooky, scary skeletons ♪

00:23:55,976 --> 00:23:57,853

♪ Shout startling, shrilly screams ♪

00:23:57,853 --> 00:23:59,855

♪ They'll sneak

from their sarcophagus ♪

00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:01,523

♪ And just won't let you be ♪

00:00:07,007 --> 00:00:10,010

{\an8}[♪ pleasant music playing]

00:00:11,594 --> 00:00:13,680

Fancington Pines has it all,

00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:18,101

a saltwater spa, $15 iced teas,

and regular-sized golf.

00:00:18,101 --> 00:00:20,228

I didn't know you could putt-putt

without the windmill!

00:00:20,228 --> 00:00:22,647

It's just short grass.

We have that at home.

00:00:22,647 --> 00:00:25,817

Bone marrow on tap and an oyster bar?

00:00:25,817 --> 00:00:28,486

Is there anything fancy

Fancington doesn't have?

00:00:28,486 --> 00:00:30,113

Genre inclusivity.

00:00:30,113 --> 00:00:33,408

That's why I'm the chair

of the Sci-Fi Diversity Initiative.

00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:37,495

We have so many rich humans

and only a couple rich aliens.

00:00:37,495 --> 00:00:39,789

Your family would be

an excellent addition.

00:00:39,789 --> 00:00:43,418

Hold up, the only time I'm a token alien

is at a Phish concert, bruh.

00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:45,336

Oh, you're not token at all.

00:00:45,336 --> 00:00:47,380

We already have sci-fi members.

00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:50,091

They're dining in

the Luxe Lounge right now.

00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:54,637

I don't know if we're going

to fit in at a place like... Holy socks!

00:00:54,637 --> 00:00:56,139

[Terry]

Oh! That's the alien from Alien

00:00:56,139 --> 00:00:58,683

and General Chang from

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country.

00:00:58,683 --> 00:01:00,018

[Solars exclaiming]

00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:02,520

- Wait, aren't they bad guys?

- Only on screen.

00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:04,230

In real life, they're producing partners.

00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:06,441

Hey, Chang!

Quote some Klingon Shakespeare!

00:01:06,441 --> 00:01:09,194

- [screams]

- He doesn't like it when people ask that.

00:01:09,778 --> 00:01:10,987

Where do we sign

the membership agreement?

00:01:10,987 --> 00:01:13,406

I assume there's some fraternity hazing

we have to endure?

00:01:13,406 --> 00:01:14,783

Walking around in our underwear,

00:01:14,783 --> 00:01:16,910

drinking to excess,

maybe some light torture?

00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:19,079

I'll finally have a place

to wear my tennis skirts!

00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,581

I'm so sick of all the written complaints

from the climbing gym.

00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:23,666

So what if they're getting a peep?

That's the point.

00:01:23,666 --> 00:01:25,835

I was in the moment

I heard it was exclusive,

00:01:25,835 --> 00:01:27,545

not like the Burger King Kids Club.

00:01:27,545 --> 00:01:28,797

This is the perfect place

00:01:28,797 --> 00:01:30,965

for a whirlwind romance

with a dance instructor

00:01:30,965 --> 00:01:32,884

who's from the wrong side of the tracks.

00:01:32,884 --> 00:01:34,302

Before any of that,

00:01:34,302 --> 00:01:36,054

we need to find a time

for you to meet with the board

00:01:36,054 --> 00:01:37,263

to be evaluated.

00:01:37,263 --> 00:01:40,475

I think you're great,

but they don't let many new families in.

00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:42,644

They don't?

Oh, man, we're boned!

00:01:42,644 --> 00:01:43,937

- [phone ringing]

- Ugh, I gotta take this.

00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:45,063

It's my uncut gem guy.

00:01:45,063 --> 00:01:46,773

You guys have a real chance.

00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:49,359

They just wanna make sure

you aren't freaky weirdos.

00:01:49,359 --> 00:01:50,735

We're very normal.

00:01:51,194 --> 00:01:52,320

- [eyeball pops]

- [all yelp]

00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:54,572

Uh, Korv? Your eye just fell out!

00:01:54,572 --> 00:01:56,491

What, ew!

He's gonna think we're weird.

00:01:56,491 --> 00:01:57,575

[Yumyulack/Jesse] Hide it, hide it!

00:01:57,575 --> 00:02:00,370

Alright, I think I can get you in

with the admissions board tomorrow.

00:02:00,370 --> 00:02:02,539

Well, that can't be right.

Tomorrow's Halloween!

00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:04,791

Won't they be busy Monster Mashing

like everyone else?

00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:07,752

[laughs] We don't celebrate

a lowbrow nitwit holiday

00:02:07,752 --> 00:02:10,672

like Halloween here at Fancington Pines.

00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:12,006

Will tomorrow be a problem?

00:02:12,006 --> 00:02:13,258

No, no!

00:02:13,258 --> 00:02:15,093

We hate Halloween,

and we don't even have brows.

00:02:15,093 --> 00:02:17,637

- We'll be there.

- Great, I'll make sure you're confirmed!

00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:19,848

- See you tomorrow.

- [Korvo retching]

00:02:19,848 --> 00:02:20,932

[Solars gag]

00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:23,560

The Solar Opposites

are joining a country club!

00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:26,187

Sorry, are we just gonna ignore the fact

that you barfed up a bat?

00:02:26,187 --> 00:02:28,648

Because you got real upset

when I barfed up

00:02:28,648 --> 00:02:32,277

The Solar Opposites

Halloween Special 2!

00:02:32,735 --> 00:02:35,530

[Korvo] Planet Shlorp was

a perfect Jack-O-Lantern

00:02:35,530 --> 00:02:37,740

until the clown head hit.

00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:40,326

A hundred adults and their replicants

were issued a Pupa

00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:42,036

and shot into the... space

00:02:42,036 --> 00:02:44,247

which was full

of cobwebs and candy.

00:02:44,247 --> 00:02:46,499

We crashed on Earth

wearing a big witch hat,

00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:48,418

stranding us on

an already decorated planet.

00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:50,628

Yes, that's right,

I've been haunting this whole time.

00:02:50,628 --> 00:02:51,713

I'm the one holding the Pupa.

00:02:51,713 --> 00:02:53,464

My name's Korvo.

This is my special.

00:02:53,464 --> 00:02:55,216

Oh, bollocks,

I just dropped the Pupa.

00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:56,509

Oh, this is ridiculous.

00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:58,595

I hate Halloween.

It's a horrible holiday.

00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:00,471

Oh, I can't believe

we're doing this again.

00:03:00,471 --> 00:03:01,931

Look at that big purple cat!

00:03:01,931 --> 00:03:05,143

{\an8}[♪ dramatic music playing]

00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:10,982

{\an8}Man, I'm so dang peeved

that we aren't really doing Halloween.

00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:13,693

{\an8}How can Fancington Pines

not respect Dracula's birthday?

00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:15,278

{\an8}God, what'll the libs ruin next?

00:03:15,278 --> 00:03:18,198

{\an8}Oh, maybe we should do

an afterschool special instead!

00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:21,534

{\an8}We can all get addicted to drugs

and play with a downed power line.

00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:22,744

{\an8}Halloween sucks!

00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:25,413

{\an8}It's below Passover

in my top ten list of holidays.

00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:27,457

{\an8}Dia de los Mentos is at the top!

00:03:27,457 --> 00:03:29,417

{\an8}You gotta celebrate the Freshmaker!

00:03:29,417 --> 00:03:31,085

{\an8}Decorations?

00:03:31,085 --> 00:03:34,255

{\an8}What part of, "We aren't doing Halloween"

do you two not understand?

00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:36,799

{\an8}Wait, is this because you still think

Halloween is too spooky?

00:03:36,799 --> 00:03:39,928

{\an8}No, the only thing I'm scared of

is not getting into Fancington Pines.

00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:43,264

{\an8}Halloween is out,

being classy and non-nitwitty is in.

00:03:43,264 --> 00:03:44,766

{\an8}- [eyeball pops]

- [all yell]

00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:46,684

{\an8}Korvo, I wanna be respectful here,

00:03:46,684 --> 00:03:48,603

{\an8}but what the fuck is happening

with your eyes?

00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:49,812

{\an8}I don't know, who gives a shit?

00:03:49,812 --> 00:03:52,899

{\an8}It's just, the eye thing

combined with the bat barfing,

00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:54,484

{\an8}you're seeming kinda spooky.

00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:56,194

{\an8}I'll tell you what's not spooky.

00:03:56,194 --> 00:03:58,238

{\an8}This Cerulean Alo Yoga tennis skirt.

00:03:58,238 --> 00:03:59,322

{\an8}Oh, gimme!

00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:00,531

{\an8}- [teeth clattering]

- Ugh!

00:04:00,531 --> 00:04:02,367

{\an8}Uh, you okay, buddy?

00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:04,244

{\an8}Yes, let's focus on the task at hand.

00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:05,870

{\an8}You know your teeth just fell out.

00:04:05,870 --> 00:04:07,914

{\an8}It's not very feminist

to ask people to smile.

00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:09,374

{\an8}You look like a creepy pumpkin.

00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:11,793

{\an8}What, no, I don't!

I'm just a regular hairless alien!

00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:12,961

[all gasp]

00:04:13,711 --> 00:04:15,922

- [thunder crashes]

- [witch cackling]

00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:18,007

Hello, my pretties!

00:04:18,007 --> 00:04:20,260

I am the First Witch,

00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,845

one of the legendary spirits of Halloween.

00:04:22,845 --> 00:04:27,308

I spread Halloween fun

and chaos to all who celebrate.

00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:28,559

Wow, oh, my God!

00:04:28,559 --> 00:04:30,770

{\an8}Welcome!

Happy Halloween, The First Witch.

00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:32,939

{\an8}Piss off!

We are a family of science,

00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:35,108

{\an8}and we stopped celebrating

Halloween earlier today.

00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:36,734

[cackling]

00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:39,654

Stopped celebrating Halloween?

00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:41,739

{\an8}Oh, no, my pretty,

00:04:41,739 --> 00:04:45,410

{\an8}I think you'll find

that you are Halloween!

00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:47,578

- [thunder crashes]

- Stop calling me pretty.

00:04:47,578 --> 00:04:49,414

At most, I'm boyishly handsome,

00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:51,082

and I have nothing to do with Halloween.

00:04:51,082 --> 00:04:54,210

Since you killed the Great Pumpkin

last Halloween,

00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:57,380

his holiday spirit has transferred

to you, my pretty.

00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:59,299

Uh, needle scratch, what?

00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,718

Korvo is the new Great Pumpkin!

00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:02,802

Shut your witch ass up.

00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:04,887

I'm a great addition

to a country club, is what I am.

00:05:04,887 --> 00:05:08,433

Agh! There is no resisting

the Halloween spirit.

00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:11,227

If you try, it will manifest around you.

00:05:11,227 --> 00:05:12,729

[thunder crashes]

00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:14,397

There's no stopping this.

00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:17,066

You are the Great Pumpkin!

00:05:17,066 --> 00:05:18,901

Oh, yeah?

Would the Great Pumpkin do this?

00:05:18,901 --> 00:05:21,029

- [laser fires]

- [First Witch screaming]

00:05:21,029 --> 00:05:24,407

Korvo, no! You gotta stop zapping

holiday creatures in the living room.

00:05:24,407 --> 00:05:26,326

I just got that elf out of the carpet.

00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,369

Oh, bollocks, she's reforming!

00:05:28,369 --> 00:05:31,539

You can't destroy a magical witch

with sci-fi stuff, Korvo.

00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:32,665

Yeah, everyone knows that.

00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:34,042

Pupa, JK Sevens!

00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:36,836

If you can find a way

to kill this Witchlet,

00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:38,129

I will buy each one of you

00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:40,923

one of those sticky, slappy hand things

you love so much.

00:05:40,923 --> 00:05:42,842

Remember, sci-fi stuff won't work.

00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:44,969

I'm only bringing it up again

because neither of you really talk,

00:05:44,969 --> 00:05:46,721

so I wanna make sure

you don't forget it later.

00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:48,723

- Alright!

- [JK beeping]

00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:49,807

Wait a minute.

00:05:49,807 --> 00:05:51,976

You told us that the Great Pumpkin

was alive and well.

00:05:51,976 --> 00:05:54,645

I... I don't recall saying

those exact words.

00:05:54,645 --> 00:05:58,191

I do. Something fishy

is going on here, Korvo!

00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:01,152

Yeah, I think Halloween is stupid

and the Great Pumpkin is a bubble butt,

00:06:01,152 --> 00:06:02,445

but you did say that!

00:06:02,445 --> 00:06:04,030

I was in a tight spot.

00:06:04,405 --> 00:06:07,158

Our neighbor Randall, the one who was

way too into his haunted house,

00:06:07,158 --> 00:06:09,285

he was gonna kill me and the Crypt Keeper.

00:06:09,285 --> 00:06:11,329

I had to carve up

the Great Pumpkin to save us.

00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:13,081

How was I supposed to know his powers

00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:15,124

followed the same rules

as The Santa Clause?

00:06:15,124 --> 00:06:17,543

That's some bullshit genre mixing,

if you ask me.

00:06:17,543 --> 00:06:19,128

It does seem like a stretch.

00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:21,506

Look, I promise, after we get

into the country club,

00:06:21,506 --> 00:06:23,383

we'll deal with the Great Pumpkin stuff.

00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:26,511

Okay, but I don't wanna forget

like we do with everything else

00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:28,054

we say we aren't gonna forget.

00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:30,807

We have one day to get posh,

and then we'll do the pumpkin shit.

00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,392

- [all cheering]

- [teeth clattering]

00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,103

Oh, dammit.

Help me pick up my teeth.

00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:39,941

- [tailor humming]

- Oh!

00:06:39,941 --> 00:06:41,734

You want-a da slim fit?

00:06:41,734 --> 00:06:43,528

Whatever your snootiest

club members wear.

00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:45,279

Most of them wear-a slim fit.

00:06:45,279 --> 00:06:47,532

- [explosion booms]

- [all gasp]

00:06:47,532 --> 00:06:48,741

Oh, Go... Oh!

00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:50,993

I, I must have forgotten

to take my Ozempic!

00:06:50,993 --> 00:06:53,413

- Measure again.

- [explosion booms]

00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:54,789

[tailor stammering]

00:06:54,789 --> 00:06:56,624

Il fantasma!

00:06:56,624 --> 00:06:58,209

[screaming]

00:06:58,709 --> 00:07:00,545

Korvo, the Witch said

spooky stuff would happen

00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:02,046

if you resisted your Halloween-ness,

00:07:02,046 --> 00:07:03,548

and now you're clearly a pumpkin

00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:05,383

and Terry turned into a friggin' ghost!

00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:06,634

I still think you look great.

00:07:06,634 --> 00:07:09,137

Of course, I look great, honey.

I'm a dime piece.

00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:12,265

But I don't wanna be a ghost.

Now I can't wear any cool shirts, see?

00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:13,933

[grunting] Ugh!

00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:16,602

How are we going to hide

Terry's ghost-ness at the interview?

00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:19,230

If we can't impress them

with fancy new outfits,

00:07:19,230 --> 00:07:22,900

maybe we can distract them

with fancy-ass cars.

00:07:22,900 --> 00:07:23,985

Yes, great idea.

00:07:23,985 --> 00:07:26,571

I always judge people

by the price of their car.

00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:27,989

Stupid sperm tail.

00:07:27,989 --> 00:07:30,116

I look like Casper the Friendly Fart!

00:07:32,493 --> 00:07:33,494

[JK Sevens beeping]

00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:36,747

My pretties!

00:07:36,747 --> 00:07:38,040

Bye-bye.

00:07:38,541 --> 00:07:40,168

[Witchlet squelching]

00:07:40,835 --> 00:07:43,171

[Witchlet raving]

00:07:47,049 --> 00:07:48,342

[Pupa grunts]

00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:52,346

Can I interest you in any

of our hair-raising deals

00:07:52,346 --> 00:07:53,973

with bone-rattling low rates?

00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,391

You can cut the Halloween crap.

00:07:55,391 --> 00:07:58,019

Give us your fanciest,

most country-club-iest, car-iest car.

00:07:58,019 --> 00:07:59,103

- [explosions boom]

- [Jesse/Terry gasp]

00:07:59,103 --> 00:08:00,813

[explosions booming]

00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:02,732

- What the hell?

- Don't even start!

00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,275

That witch said this would happen.

00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:05,860

I'm sorry,

but if people saw someone

00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:07,445

as weird as you

in one of our vehicles,

00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,489

it could make the entire brand seem dorky.

00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:10,573

It's happened before.

00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:12,283

[whispers] Tesla.

00:08:12,825 --> 00:08:15,870

[Korvo] Maybe all we need

is perfect table manners.

00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:17,955

{\an8}It says here, you're supposed

to start on the outside

00:08:17,955 --> 00:08:19,123

{\an8}and work your way in.

00:08:19,123 --> 00:08:21,501

This blade ain't gonna do the trick

if I need to fuck someone up.

00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,670

It's way too dull.

Ah, I cut myself!

00:08:24,670 --> 00:08:25,922

Owie, ow!

00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:27,006

Stop it, shut up!

00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:29,217

Fancy people care about

this stuff, so we have to.

00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:30,551

I need you to make an effort.

00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:31,928

Okay, fine, we will.

00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:33,387

Good, I trust you.

00:08:33,387 --> 00:08:34,972

Plus, I'm electrifying the table,

00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:36,807

so try hard to get the answers right.

00:08:36,807 --> 00:08:38,684

You can't electrify a tablecloth.

00:08:38,684 --> 00:08:39,936

- [electricity crackling]

- [Yumyulack yelping]

00:08:39,936 --> 00:08:42,021

Ow, you zapped my stabbin' hand!

00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:44,023

Hey, Korvo, I think

you finally figured out

00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:45,399

how to beat the Halloween spookiness.

00:08:45,399 --> 00:08:46,484

- [explosion booming]

- [all scream]

00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:50,446

Meow. Looks like now

I'm one of those sexy cats

00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:52,698

everyone's always

dressing up as for Halloween.

00:08:52,698 --> 00:08:54,116

Aw, man, no fair!

00:08:54,116 --> 00:08:55,701

I wanna be a sexy cat.

00:08:55,701 --> 00:08:56,953

[doorbell rings]

00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,120

[♪ suspenseful music playing]

00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:59,539

Oh, no, it's Ranch!

00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,832

Everyone act like

we aren't turning into shit.

00:09:01,832 --> 00:09:04,544

Hello there, Ranch.

What a pleasant surprise.

00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:05,753

'Kay, bye, now.

00:09:05,753 --> 00:09:07,672

I just wanted to check on

my favorite aliens

00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:08,839

before their big day.

00:09:08,839 --> 00:09:11,842

[gasps] Oh, my God, you're all so spooky.

00:09:11,842 --> 00:09:13,469

You all used to be sci-fi.

00:09:13,469 --> 00:09:14,595

It's not what it looks like.

00:09:14,595 --> 00:09:16,264

I know exactly what it looks like,

00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:17,848

and it looks like

you're turning into a pumpkin

00:09:17,848 --> 00:09:20,560

and transforming those around you

with some sort of Halloween magic.

00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:21,644

Damn, he's good.

00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:23,104

Hey, at least I'm still an alien.

00:09:23,104 --> 00:09:24,355

[explosion booms]

00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:25,690

Aoofta!

00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:30,736

Now I'm a werewolf,

and I'm hungry for candy corn!

00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:31,821

[howling]

00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:34,031

What the hell is going on around here?

00:09:34,031 --> 00:09:36,117

It's hard to explain,

but I'll bet you a billion dollars

00:09:36,117 --> 00:09:38,452

we can undo this Halloween chaos

before tomorrow.

00:09:38,452 --> 00:09:39,537

[explosion booms]

00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:41,872

- Yeah!

- [♪ upbeat spooky music playing]

00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:44,250

Just to be clear,

that was a rhetorical bet.

00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:49,422

[Ranch] There's no chance

you'll get into Fancington

00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:50,506

looking like this.

00:09:50,506 --> 00:09:51,591

We have a conservative board.

00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,968

They all smoke indoors,

and none of them wear seat belts.

00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:56,137

Maybe we can push the interview,

do it later in the year

00:09:56,137 --> 00:09:57,638

where their right-wing views

will be softened

00:09:57,638 --> 00:09:58,973

by watching the Avatar movies.

00:09:58,973 --> 00:10:01,100

No, tomorrow's the last day

they're meeting people!

00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:02,643

But since my name's on the line,

00:10:02,643 --> 00:10:06,355

I'll help you find a way to hide

all this disgusting Halloweenie-ness.

00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:07,440

We'll do anything.

00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,275

We're good at hiding

how disgusting we are.

00:10:09,275 --> 00:10:10,901

- [retches]

- [candy rattling]

00:10:10,901 --> 00:10:12,945

Ew, Mary Janes, barf.

00:10:12,945 --> 00:10:14,363

Still, candy is candy.

00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:15,781

Oh, goddamn it.

00:10:16,115 --> 00:10:17,533

Mm, goddamn it.

00:10:17,533 --> 00:10:19,327

He's not gonna do this

in front of the board, right?

00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:20,620

- Oh, no, no.

- Goddamn it!

00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,497

It doesn't make any sense for me

to keep eating this candy,

00:10:23,497 --> 00:10:25,207

but I'm gonna do it.

00:10:26,083 --> 00:10:27,877

[Korvo] You really think

this is gonna trick the rich folk,

00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:29,920

covering up my orange

and making me look expensive?

00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:32,882

This is the exact shade of silver they use

on the Webby Award statues.

00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:34,383

Top-of-the-line shit.

00:10:34,383 --> 00:10:36,385

Is that the same paint

that poisoned the Tin Man?

00:10:36,385 --> 00:10:38,721

Yeah, that's why we had

to buy it through AliExpress.

00:10:38,721 --> 00:10:41,015

- [explosion booms]

- Oh, dammit!

00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:42,850

- [razor buzzing]

- Ooh, la, la.

00:10:42,850 --> 00:10:46,187

I went from Halloween tragic

to sexy magic.

00:10:46,187 --> 00:10:47,313

- [explosion booms]

- [Jesse screams]

00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,273

- [thud]

- Oh, geez.

00:10:50,399 --> 00:10:53,152

[Terry] What do you think?

Not looking like a ghost now, huh?

00:10:53,152 --> 00:10:55,237

- Pretty hot, right?

- Mm, it's not working.

00:10:55,237 --> 00:10:56,781

You just look like an even cheaper ghost.

00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:58,240

[Terry] How about with the blacklight?

00:10:59,575 --> 00:11:00,743

Don't worry about the stains.

00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:03,579

They're just piss and shit

and soup and blood.

00:11:03,579 --> 00:11:04,664

And cum.

00:11:05,039 --> 00:11:08,042

Focus, you're not a sorority girl,

and this isn't rush week.

00:11:08,042 --> 00:11:09,293

Now, repeat after me.

00:11:09,293 --> 00:11:12,171

"The quarrelsome queen

quaffed quickly and quietly."

00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:15,049

Meow! Why don't we quit

this silly nonsense

00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:16,550

and go out on the town?

00:11:16,550 --> 00:11:19,929

"The quarrelsome queen

quaffed quickly and quietly!"

00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:22,973

[purrs] Wanna hold each other's hair

when we throw up?

00:11:22,973 --> 00:11:24,392

"The quarrelsome queen--"

00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:26,310

[gasps] Jackie hooked up with Dennis?

00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:28,187

That bitch knows we've been texting.

00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:30,064

You have to help me destroy her!

00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:32,191

[groans] This is impossible.

00:11:32,191 --> 00:11:34,360

You all have too much

Halloween chaos energy.

00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,737

Plus, to be honest,

you're also kind of gross,

00:11:36,737 --> 00:11:38,739

and I think you have

clinical focus issues.

00:11:38,739 --> 00:11:40,491

And I still look like a pumpkin.

00:11:40,491 --> 00:11:42,993

But I wanna wear the tennis skirts

and drink seltzer water

00:11:42,993 --> 00:11:45,246

and be judgmental

with the other pro shop wives.

00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:46,789

It's my dream, dammit.

00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:49,709

There's one last thing we could try,

00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:51,877

but it's pretty drastic.

00:11:51,877 --> 00:11:54,171

I used to dabble in Halloween myself.

00:11:54,171 --> 00:11:55,840

My sophomore year at Harvard.

00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:57,133

I loved the drinking,

00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:59,552

the pretending that ground beef

was Frankenstein's brains,

00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,971

and watching Hellbound: Hellraiser II

over and over again

00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:03,597

for the entire month of October!

00:12:03,597 --> 00:12:06,851

But my youthful dalliances

brought great shame to my family.

00:12:06,851 --> 00:12:07,935

How did they heal you?

00:12:07,935 --> 00:12:09,603

They had a book from the Old World

00:12:09,603 --> 00:12:11,355

full of witchcraft and dark magic.

00:12:11,355 --> 00:12:13,733

They used it to create an elixir

which straightened me out.

00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:14,984

I love elixirs!

00:12:14,984 --> 00:12:17,403

They're like the Snapples

of the magic world.

00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:19,071

Why didn't we do the elixir thing

right off the bat?

00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:21,532

- [bat screeches]

- Whoa! I didn't wanna suggest it.

00:12:21,532 --> 00:12:23,701

The elixir causes a drastic change!

00:12:23,701 --> 00:12:25,619

You won't recognize yourselves.

00:12:25,619 --> 00:12:26,746

Yes, that's what we need!

00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,497

Trying to buy a fancy car is one thing,

00:12:28,497 --> 00:12:30,624

but are you sure you wanna mess

with dark magic?

00:12:30,624 --> 00:12:31,751

We have to.

00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:34,670

God, I would kill for a cosmo right now.

00:12:34,670 --> 00:12:36,922

I don't know, maybe we're just

a chaotic family

00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:38,758

and aren't cut out for Fancington Pines.

00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:41,260

We can be our chaotic selves

in the privacy of our own home

00:12:41,260 --> 00:12:42,887

and hobnob with the elites at the club.

00:12:42,887 --> 00:12:44,764

- Best of both worlds!

- Okay.

00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:48,392

And not just because you quoted

the Hannah Montana theme song.

00:12:48,392 --> 00:12:51,228

All we need is a big,

black pot with a heat source.

00:12:51,228 --> 00:12:54,523

Whoa, we get to use

the multipurpose holiday cauldron again.

00:12:54,523 --> 00:12:57,067

And you said we'd never use it

more than twice.

00:12:57,067 --> 00:12:58,402

[thunder crashes]

00:12:58,402 --> 00:13:01,071

[Ranch] This book is

an old family heirloom

00:13:01,071 --> 00:13:02,615

brought over on the Mayflower.

00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:05,117

Goddamn, this smells

like a dead dog's dick.

00:13:05,117 --> 00:13:06,619

And I would know. [laughs]

00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:08,204

It's ancient and made from skin!

00:13:08,204 --> 00:13:10,414

But the smell is from when

my basement flooded last year.

00:13:10,414 --> 00:13:13,125

We must cast that

which makes Halloween chaotic

00:13:13,125 --> 00:13:14,585

into the cauldron!

00:13:14,585 --> 00:13:18,506

An empty candy bowl with a note

telling you to donate to UNICEF!

00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:20,925

A Napoleon Dynamite costume!

00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:22,676

Farewell, sweet prince.

00:13:22,676 --> 00:13:26,347

A sack of pennies handed out

by an elderly woman!

00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:28,015

Ugh, cheap bitch.

00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:33,646

Some eggs, some toilet paper,

and et cetera.

00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:34,897

[potion bubbling]

00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:36,190

The elixir is set.

00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:37,483

Oh, now you must bathe in it

00:13:37,483 --> 00:13:39,819

to remove the holiday chaos

from yourselves.

00:13:40,402 --> 00:13:42,279

[Solars screaming]

00:13:42,279 --> 00:13:44,198

Oh, God! Oh, it burns!

00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:47,159

This is what it must feel like

to be a tongue on Hot Ones!

00:13:47,159 --> 00:13:49,703

It's working!

00:13:49,703 --> 00:13:51,455

- [♪ sinister music playing]

- [potion bubbling]

00:13:56,043 --> 00:13:58,087

[explosion booms]

00:13:58,087 --> 00:14:00,506

[pedestal whirring]

00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:03,425

- Did it work?

- Yes!

00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:04,927

Didn't you hear me screaming?

00:14:04,927 --> 00:14:06,637

No, I was in a cauldron.

00:14:06,637 --> 00:14:08,472

Right. Well, yes, it worked.

00:14:08,472 --> 00:14:09,974

[JK Sevens beeping]

00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:12,101

[train rumbling]

00:14:12,893 --> 00:14:14,061

[Witchlet squelches]

00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:17,231

- Yeah, woo-hoo!

- [happy beeping]

00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:19,149

[♪ sinister music playing]

00:14:19,149 --> 00:14:21,735

[Witchlet cackling]

00:14:21,735 --> 00:14:23,070

[train rumbling]

00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:27,533

[Pupa sighs]

00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:28,868

[Witchlet squelches]

00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:33,956

[board member] You've surprised us today.

00:14:33,956 --> 00:14:37,334

This board usually finds aliens

to be too whimsical,

00:14:37,334 --> 00:14:39,336

zapping things with rays and whatnot.

00:14:39,336 --> 00:14:40,629

Oh, that's not us.

00:14:40,629 --> 00:14:43,382

We just like to be rich

and hold as still as possible.

00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:46,260

I know it well.

I just have one final question.

00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:49,471

What is your favorite type of chalice?

00:14:49,471 --> 00:14:51,640

Uh, jeweled.

00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:53,058

[board murmuring]

00:14:53,058 --> 00:14:56,103

We are most impressed

with your sedate, compliant,

00:14:56,103 --> 00:14:58,397

almost paper-white temperament.

00:14:58,397 --> 00:15:02,735

Your application

to Fancington Pines is accepted.

00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:04,361

[Solars] [unenthusiastically] Yay.

00:15:04,361 --> 00:15:06,155

This is the high point of our lives.

00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:09,158

[laughs]

That's the unmistakable bored affect

00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:10,868

of a Fancington man.

00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:13,746

We did it.

We're members just like you.

00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,831

Can I see that little mouth

you got inside your mouth?

00:15:15,831 --> 00:15:18,918

Oh, man, if I had one of those,

I'd be fucking and sucking everything.

00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:20,169

[General Chang]

What do you think you're doing?

00:15:20,169 --> 00:15:22,838

This is the private

members-only dining room.

00:15:22,838 --> 00:15:24,798

We just passed the rich guy test,

we're members.

00:15:24,798 --> 00:15:26,300

[both laughing]

00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:27,968

You fools aren't members!

00:15:27,968 --> 00:15:30,054

But we shook an old man's hand.

00:15:30,054 --> 00:15:34,683

Look around and tell me if anyone else

is wearing one of those hideous blazers.

00:15:35,225 --> 00:15:36,435

[Korvo] Oh, my God.

00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:38,062

If these aren't members' blazers...

00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:39,980

You just got hired as valets.

00:15:39,980 --> 00:15:42,107

[both laughing]

00:15:42,107 --> 00:15:43,817

[club members laughing]

00:15:43,817 --> 00:15:45,986

You're being a real bitch right now.

00:15:45,986 --> 00:15:47,613

Us aliens have to stick together.

00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:50,783

We're real aliens,

not some low-rent plants.

00:15:50,783 --> 00:15:53,118

That's why we're the stars

of film franchises.

00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:55,788

Fetch my Rivian, you dandelion bitch.

00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:58,958

I'll have you know

we are personal friends with Ranch White.

00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,669

When he finds out about this,

heads will roll!

00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:02,795

Who's Ranch White?

00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:05,756

That's the most made-up

rich guy name I've ever heard.

00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:08,592

[club members laughing]

00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,011

[Terry] As first impressions go,

not great,

00:16:11,011 --> 00:16:14,181

but I say we go back tomorrow,

park a few cars, and see if it's fun.

00:16:14,181 --> 00:16:16,308

That club is full of nothing

but rich twunts,

00:16:16,308 --> 00:16:18,894

and those aliens were

the biggest shitbags of the bunch!

00:16:18,894 --> 00:16:20,688

We should have seen this coming!

00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:23,983

Why would a place called

Fancington Pines ever want us?

00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,484

We're not pines.

00:16:25,484 --> 00:16:28,153

And why did they act like

they didn't know who Ranch was?

00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:30,614

The worst part is, we gave away

all our fun Halloween chaos

00:16:30,614 --> 00:16:31,991

to get into that stupid club.

00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:33,158

We love Halloween.

00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:34,660

It's October 31st.

00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,787

We still have time

to get our Halloween chaos

00:16:36,787 --> 00:16:37,871

back from the cauldron.

00:16:37,871 --> 00:16:39,373

- Oh!

- [♪ sinister music playing]

00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:42,543

No, all our chaotic cauldron goo is gone!

00:16:42,543 --> 00:16:43,711

That can't be right.

00:16:43,711 --> 00:16:46,130

Did we go to the wrong alien spaceship

with a cauldron in it?

00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:47,297

Where, where are your keys?

00:16:47,297 --> 00:16:49,883

Just do the beep to see if we...

if this is the wrong one.

00:16:49,883 --> 00:16:51,802

[sinister laughter]

00:16:54,221 --> 00:16:56,640

Ranch, why are your eyes glowing?

00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,435

Did you drink the chaos goo?

00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:01,603

Gobble, gobble, motherfuckers.

00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:02,896

[all scream]

00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:09,570

[arm whirring]

00:17:09,570 --> 00:17:11,864

[gasoline sloshing]

00:17:14,158 --> 00:17:15,200

[explosion booms]

00:17:17,745 --> 00:17:20,414

- [Pupa grunts]

- [Witchlet screeching]

00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:24,752

- [thunder crashing]

- Gobble, gobble, gobble!

00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:26,128

Is he laugh-gobbling?

00:17:26,128 --> 00:17:28,297

Yeah, but nobody gobbles on Halloween.

00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:30,007

You really messed up, Ranch!

00:17:30,007 --> 00:17:31,383

That was an interview for valets!

00:17:31,383 --> 00:17:34,053

- I set you up!

- You did, why?

00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:37,639

I'm not Ranch White,

cool country club fuck boi.

00:17:37,639 --> 00:17:41,560

I'm actually the holiday spirit

of Thanksgiving,

00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:44,646

the Grand Brown Gravy!

00:17:44,646 --> 00:17:46,440

- [Solars gasp]

- The what now?

00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,608

You've heard of me.

00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:49,985

I'm like the Great Pumpkin

but for Thanksgiving,

00:17:49,985 --> 00:17:52,112

Okay, must not be as popular of a spirit.

00:17:52,112 --> 00:17:55,199

Oh, once the Great Pumpkin was slain,

00:17:55,199 --> 00:17:56,533

I've been waiting,

00:17:56,533 --> 00:18:00,329

plotting to steal his powers from Korvo.

00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:02,122

But Thanksgiving is nothing

like Halloween!

00:18:02,122 --> 00:18:06,251

Which is why I have

to destroy Halloween forever!

00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:07,920

- No!

- [gravy sloshing]

00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:10,047

Hey, get your nasty-ass gravy

off my man.

00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:12,382

Thanksgiving is always an afterthought,

00:18:12,382 --> 00:18:15,719

a punchline nobody looks forward to

because of the dry turkey.

00:18:15,719 --> 00:18:17,304

[Yumyulack] Just leave Halloween alone!

00:18:17,304 --> 00:18:18,972

You already have a holiday!

00:18:18,972 --> 00:18:21,934

One day, people won't remember

Thanksgiving at all,

00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:24,812

just like Plough Monday!

00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:26,688

Maybe Thanksgiving deserves to die,

00:18:26,688 --> 00:18:29,358

and people can just get together

and have dinner.

00:18:29,358 --> 00:18:34,154

Oh, not with my new

double holiday spirit powers!

00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:39,368

I will steal everything about Halloween

and apply it to Thanksgiving!

00:18:39,368 --> 00:18:42,871

An irresponsible amount

of drinking, sexy gourds,

00:18:42,871 --> 00:18:46,834

and kids going door to door

to get slices of cranberry sauce!

00:18:46,834 --> 00:18:50,003

It's going to be beautiful!

00:18:50,003 --> 00:18:51,880

Not if we kick your ass first!

00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:52,965

[laser fires]

00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:56,260

Sci-fi stuff doesn't work

on holiday spirits.

00:18:56,260 --> 00:19:00,013

The only thing that could destroy me

would be Halloween stuff,

00:19:00,013 --> 00:19:05,602

and you dumbasses threw

all yours in a cauldron!

00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:07,396

[sinister laughter]

00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:09,773

We still have Halloween candy

and decorations downstairs.

00:19:09,773 --> 00:19:12,151

Let's use those to take

this butt nugget down!

00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:15,028

[Grand Brown Gravy roaring]

00:19:15,028 --> 00:19:18,323

- [Solars panting]

- Let's take a moment before fighting

00:19:18,323 --> 00:19:21,285

to reflect on what

we're most thankful for.

00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:23,036

- No, fuck you!

- [Yumyulack grunts]

00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:25,539

Take that!

00:19:26,039 --> 00:19:29,793

Oh, crap, he turned our Halloween stuff

into Plough Monday shit.

00:19:29,793 --> 00:19:32,296

It's Thanksgiving shit, you bastard!

00:19:32,296 --> 00:19:33,881

[groans]

00:19:33,881 --> 00:19:36,425

Dammit, attack them, my food warriors.

00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:37,801

[Jesse screaming]

00:19:37,801 --> 00:19:40,596

- [Yumyulack grunting]

- [cork popping]

00:19:41,805 --> 00:19:42,973

[Korvo] Let's get to the backyard!

00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:48,353

You can run, but the holidays

always creep up!

00:19:49,396 --> 00:19:51,481

What the hell?

Where are all the plastic spiders

00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:53,025

and inflatable pride dinosaurs?

00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:55,944

I spent too much of my decorating time

looking for tennis skirts!

00:19:55,944 --> 00:19:57,613

- [thud]

- [both scream]

00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:59,198

Not the cranberry sauce!

00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:00,532

We're so fucked!

00:20:00,532 --> 00:20:03,118

- [horn toots]

- Pupa, please, please tell me

00:20:03,118 --> 00:20:04,786

you didn't manage to kill the Witchlet.

00:20:04,786 --> 00:20:07,581

- [sad beeping]

- Oh, God, they killed her!

00:20:07,581 --> 00:20:08,707

Why?

00:20:08,707 --> 00:20:10,584

- [JK Sevens beeps]

- They ripped her head off!

00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:12,920

It's so sick. [retches]

00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,338

Halloween is over forever!

00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:18,425

The Haunted Mansion at Disneyland

will just be a regular mansion now.

00:20:18,425 --> 00:20:19,885

[Solars sobbing]

00:20:19,885 --> 00:20:21,470

[glass cracks]

00:20:22,638 --> 00:20:23,639

[beeps]

00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:25,432

What do you mean

you have a confession?

00:20:25,432 --> 00:20:27,184

Wait, where did you two

get these things?

00:20:27,184 --> 00:20:28,518

Witchlet!

00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:33,565

You let her bribe you with Power Wheels

then gave her snacks and a place to stay?

00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,984

- Bad Pupa and bad robot!

- [JK Sevens beeping]

00:20:35,984 --> 00:20:38,362

Whoa, I am not translating that.

00:20:38,362 --> 00:20:40,864

You're lucky we need this Witchlet,

or you'd be in big trouble.

00:20:40,864 --> 00:20:42,032

[explosion booms]

00:20:42,032 --> 00:20:43,283

[Grand Brown Gravy laughing]

00:20:43,283 --> 00:20:45,160

It's dinnertime!

00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:46,870

Please, little witch,

forgive me for trying

00:20:46,870 --> 00:20:48,080

to kill you and all the other stuff!

00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:49,831

Please help us save Halloween!

00:20:49,831 --> 00:20:50,916

[Witchlet] Hmph.

00:20:50,916 --> 00:20:52,417

- [Grand Brown Gravy laughing]

- [monsters growling]

00:20:52,417 --> 00:20:55,337

[fists thudding]

00:20:55,337 --> 00:20:57,756

Okay, I'll admit it.

I was wrong about Halloween.

00:20:57,756 --> 00:20:59,258

Halloween is a fabulous holiday.

00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:00,759

It's fun for the kids and for adults.

00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:02,844

Dressing up, begging for candy,

bobbing for apples,

00:21:02,844 --> 00:21:05,138

it's all a delight.

I like the seasonal beer.

00:21:05,138 --> 00:21:06,723

I like how you get to check out

your neighbor's house

00:21:06,723 --> 00:21:08,642

when they open the door

for trick-or-treaters!

00:21:08,642 --> 00:21:10,310

Halloween is not too spooky.

00:21:10,310 --> 00:21:12,312

Halloween rules!

00:21:12,312 --> 00:21:15,148

[First Witch cackling]

00:21:15,148 --> 00:21:18,193

[Grand Brown Gravy roaring]

00:21:18,193 --> 00:21:19,903

[♪ sinister music playing]

00:21:20,654 --> 00:21:22,155

[explosion booms]

00:21:22,155 --> 00:21:24,074

- [First Witch] Hop on!

- Oh! [yelps]

00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:27,411

You're too late! Halloween's dead.

00:21:27,411 --> 00:21:31,623

From now on,

pumpkins will only be eaten in pie!

00:21:31,623 --> 00:21:33,625

[Grand Brown Gravy laughing]

00:21:34,626 --> 00:21:37,296

- [explosion booming]

- Oh, that hurts!

00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:39,631

- But how?

- Halloween is the best.

00:21:39,631 --> 00:21:42,050

Heidi Klum's annual party.

Couples' costumes.

00:21:42,050 --> 00:21:44,970

Watching someone dressed

as a penguin vomit on the street.

00:21:44,970 --> 00:21:47,139

The house that gives out

full-size candy bars.

00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:48,223

"The Monster Mash"!

00:21:48,223 --> 00:21:51,268

Nobody has to sit at a table

and listen to a racist uncle

00:21:51,268 --> 00:21:53,687

talk about how

they don't like the Pakistanis

00:21:53,687 --> 00:21:57,357

that bought the Boston Market down on I-5!

00:22:00,569 --> 00:22:02,738

- [explosion booms]

- [gravy splashing]

00:22:03,655 --> 00:22:06,241

[explosions popping]

00:22:06,241 --> 00:22:08,076

Whew, that was a close one.

00:22:08,076 --> 00:22:11,121

I almost got my throat cut

by some bitch-ass giblets.

00:22:11,955 --> 00:22:12,956

[Korvo groans]

00:22:15,959 --> 00:22:18,628

Thank you for saving Halloween, Korvo.

00:22:18,628 --> 00:22:20,589

Your honest love for the holiday

00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:25,093

proved that you truly deserve

to be the Great Pumpkin.

00:22:25,093 --> 00:22:26,386

- Yay, Korvo!

- Woo-hoo!

00:22:26,386 --> 00:22:28,221

- You did it!

- Good job, Korvo!

00:22:28,221 --> 00:22:29,389

Candy!

00:22:29,389 --> 00:22:32,267

Actually, all that stuff

I said back there, I didn't mean it.

00:22:32,267 --> 00:22:33,643

It was all stuff Terry has said.

00:22:33,643 --> 00:22:35,604

Halloween is still too spooky for me.

00:22:35,604 --> 00:22:37,439

I'm honestly scared shitless

of you right now.

00:22:37,439 --> 00:22:41,735

But then Halloween won't have

a Great Pumpkin.

00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:43,362

No, it does.

00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:45,030

You should be the spirit of Halloween.

00:22:45,030 --> 00:22:46,114

[gasps]

00:22:47,532 --> 00:22:50,285

[magic humming]

00:22:56,583 --> 00:23:00,670

A witch as the Great Pumpkin? [laughs]

00:23:00,670 --> 00:23:02,881

Did you know this has

never happened before?

00:23:02,881 --> 00:23:04,383

No, why would we?

00:23:04,383 --> 00:23:05,759

Oh, Korvo.

00:23:05,759 --> 00:23:07,594

If I could go back

and tell that little girl

00:23:07,594 --> 00:23:09,971

that I used to be before I ate that bat

and became a witch

00:23:09,971 --> 00:23:13,350

that this would happen one day,

you know what she would say?

00:23:13,350 --> 00:23:15,519

Uh, something that ends with, "My pretty"?

00:23:15,519 --> 00:23:18,605

[laughs] Exactly, my pretty!

00:23:18,605 --> 00:23:21,316

I still have time

to spread Halloween chaos.

00:23:21,316 --> 00:23:25,278

But first, I want to grant you

a Halloween wish.

00:23:25,278 --> 00:23:28,073

Ask for some Altoids Sours.

They don't make 'em anymore.

00:23:28,573 --> 00:23:29,908

[Korvo whispering]

00:23:29,908 --> 00:23:31,701

- Granted.

- [explosion booms]

00:23:31,701 --> 00:23:33,870

- [horn tooting]

[Pupa laughing]

00:23:33,870 --> 00:23:35,372

Would you quit it?

00:23:35,372 --> 00:23:37,207

Ow, my foot!

00:23:37,207 --> 00:23:40,710

We can't park them

if you don't stop driving.

00:23:40,710 --> 00:23:43,046

♪ Spooky, scary skeletons

speak with such a screech ♪

00:23:43,046 --> 00:23:44,798

This club rules now!

00:23:45,132 --> 00:23:46,967

Hey, hey, good wish, Korvo.

00:23:47,801 --> 00:23:50,220

- [lips smacking]

- Happy Halloween, Terry.

00:23:50,220 --> 00:23:52,222

Hell yes, it is, mister.

00:23:52,222 --> 00:23:54,099

♪ But I don't think we should ♪

00:23:54,099 --> 00:23:55,976

♪ 'Cause spooky, scary skeletons ♪

00:23:55,976 --> 00:23:57,853

♪ Shout startling, shrilly screams ♪

00:23:57,853 --> 00:23:59,855

♪ They'll sneak

from their sarcophagus ♪

00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:01,523

♪ And just won't let you be ♪

00:24:02,065 --> 00:24:04,568

[♪ dramatic theme playing]

00:24:05,068 --> 00:24:07,737

[wolf howling]

00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:14,077

[sinister laughter]

00:24:18,498 --> 00:24:21,418

[electronic warbling]

00:24:24,546 --> 00:24:27,174

[♪ dramatic theme continues]

00:24:31,178 --> 00:24:32,512

[bats squeak]

00:24:43,899 --> 00:24:45,609

[owl hoots]

00:24:46,443 --> 00:24:47,944

[mimicking laser fire]